To think forgiveness is overrated and too often used to shut people up?

28 replies

SharpPlumUser · 04/10/2025 10:30

People say “forgive for your own peace” but let’s be honest, it mostly benefits the person who hurt you.

OP posts:

DrCoconut · 04/10/2025 10:51

Forgiveness is massively healing if you can do it. But it can be a journey rather than a destination and I get that in some cases it's not possible.

Deliveroo · 04/10/2025 10:49

Well unless you’re stalking them, blackmailing them, or threatening them with revenge, they’re probably not affected in the slightest by your feelings. But you are.

What people probably mean is that they don’t want to hear about it anymore. They’d like you to forgive for their peace of mind, as well as yours.

Forgiveness is hard though. Sometimes it takes a life time of practice.

Do you want to share what happened op?

IlovePhilMitchell · 04/10/2025 10:43

I don’t believe we have to forgive but if we don’t forgive then we need to move on for our own peace of mind.

It’s fine to not forgive someone and then cut them out or distance yourself from them but holding grudges to people who are in our lives often is unhealthy and not going to make for a peaceful non toxic life.

Example, someone cheats on us, cut them out and don’t forgive but do the self work to get over it.

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