To feel I’m not doing enough to help my reception child?

I’m reading that you’re more concerned about your role in supporting her than in your DDs reading development?

I’m also a secondary teacher and felt out of my depth when my own kids were at primary. I followed people like fiveminutemun (who has been mentioned already) and playhooray, who are both very experienced in the classroom and knowledgeable of the eyfs curriculum and have very sensible and practical suggestions for supporting your child. Lots of little games and activities that don’t cost anything and take a few minutes.

5 mins reading every day is all you need to do with a reception age child. Honestly.

Four and five year olds are part of EYFS in England. (Wales it goes up to 7 I think, not sure about Scotland).

My child’s private school didn’t like parents helping with phonics. They said leaving a child to their own devices was the best thing to do. And they got them reading to a year level ahead within 3 months. So I’d just trust the teachers.

Bear in mind that the teacher is under pressure for 'results'. As a teacher myself I really don't think this is in the best interests of the child. When I started teaching in the 80s there wasn't this kind of pressure for immediate, measurable results at such a young age and people now in their 40s passed exams and went to university/got jobs etc. In other countries children aren't even in school at this age and they manage to achieve academically later on.

Don’t worry - she will be fine. Have you got a parents’ evening this term? You will probably be reassured that she is on track.

I'm not arguing?? I think I said you were doing your best and I gave a potted example from my own family.

I'm sorry I'm not an expert in this field.

Their development isn’t always proportionate or linear- it can happen in fits and starts. My son was a high achiever in maths and primary and it ended up where we were worried whether or not he’d scrape a 4 at GCSE. I was in the intervention group for maths at primary I was so bad and ended up getting easily getting a B. I know this is two anecdotal examples but the most counterproductive thing you can do is worry excessively about this - it won’t be productive for either of you.

You sound like a great mum and she’s still so young. Don’t put pressure on yourself or her.

I agree with @birling16 and I used to be a Reception teacher. The advice from other posters about counting during your day and looking at numbers and letters you see around you is good. Read loads of stories purely for the love of it until they can recite The Gruffalo, Little Rabbit Foo Foo or whatever just because it's fun. They are at school all day, encourage their curiosity but let them relax and play. There is no advantage in rushing things. She will learn to read anyway.

I think that’s a bit unfair on @birling16 op. She’s telling you to unclench. The school will be aware and will be bringing your dd in line over the course of the academic year. She’s only little. Learning happens over a lifetime. The more you stress, the more she’ll lose the joy of learning because it’ll be wrapped up your anxiety. You’re not a teacher - leave it to them.

Reading at home is the main way she’ll learn vocab, grammar, sentence construction, comprehension and lots more like empathy, story telling, imagination. Just do that.

Have the school said she is struggling or falling behind?

It's October, she's been in school weeks. I have a horrible feeling that the more you worry, the worse it will get.

My son could not and would not read. On arrival at Secondary school they called me in. His scores were amongst the highest they had ever seen.

Letters on the bath? The odd word game in the car....light touch.

https://frodingham-infantschool.co.uk/parental_information/little_wandle/little_wandle.html.

We're also little wandle and I'm borrowing these homework sheets from this kind school who upload a lot of resources! We dont have any homework at such at our school so this gives me a weekly guide to recapping with DD.

We play around with the flashcards too, swatting or jumping on them when I say the sound gets them more engaged that just "what sound is this"

Are you worried she is actually falling behind already? Because from what you say she doesn't sound as though she is.
Has she had any books with words in them yet? My DD at this stage had those awful books that are like ' a pan. A pin. Tap tap. A din!'
Anyway she's in year 2 and is reading chapter books now.
We listened to her read before bed every night. We are also time poor - two kids, full time work, long commutes , kids at after school club every day. They get a lot of phonics input at school and you'll be surprised how quickly it develops.

I thought it was SATPIN rather than PEN, but all the same I'd stick to CVC words that can be created from those letters, rather than "mouse" which is way ahead from where she's at. I would also focus a little on helping her know her name, so if you can buy those colourful magnetic letters, you could both work together on making her name from them. Otherwise just stick with the SATPIN sounds and see if she can make words like PAT, TIN, SAP, etc. Make it a light-hearted game. She's already doing a long day in school, even if it is mostly play based learning she's doesn't really need much more. Reading to her at bedtime is lovely and if you can hold the book so she can see the words and pictures, it'll help I'm sure.

I wouldn't worry about her falling behind until the teachers are concerned, there's tons of variation in how quickly children pick up this stuff and there's a long way to go. You've also got holidays to do a bit more reading practice with her, if you make it part of your routine so you're consistent with it and keep it light, she's more likely to carry on with it and keep improving.

Most reception kids would do far better if when they came home just played outside, cuddled up reading books with an adult, and did lots of drawing and imaginative play. They don’t need screens and they don’t need extra phonics. Caring adults, safe home, good food and space to explore the world is enough at that age (outside of the classroom).

You don't need to sit down with a child that age and do planned activities to help them. Sing number songs whilst getting ready, point out numbers words and letters you see in the environment as you go about your day- shops, car licence plates, road/street signs etc. Say what letter something begins with, eg giving an apple for a snack say a a a a for apple. Talk about addition and subtraction when doing snack- cut up the apple and count how many are left when one piece is gone, share the pieces and see what each person has. There is so much you can do to help without actually taking any time out if your day.

This. Avoid putting too much pressure on her. Let her enjoy being 5.