To think most people offer a brew as soon as visitors arrive

When family arrive generally the first thing they’ll say is “put the kettle on!”. It always already is on.

Friends are offered a drink before they even sit down.

It’s the British way innit?

Of course! I always get the kettle on when visitors arrive. My mother (RIP) would disown me if I didn’t make the tea in the pot too, with a milk jug (not the carton) and naice cups. If they weren’t tea drinkers they’d be offered coffee, water, or anything else I could think of. I do let myself down sometimes not having any interesting soft drinks in, but in Summer I often have iced tea.
Always have a stash of biscuits hidden from the teens too, because a drinks too wet without one 😉
My friends are the same, and my favourite friends are ones who are properly brought up and arrive with cake!
I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I didn’t perform this ritual!
Ex MIL was excellent in this regard too- endless supply of tea and then gin and tonics after 5 pm!

This, kettle straight on.
Also i would worry about the quality of the work/price on the invoice from tradesmen if I didn’t provide infinite milky sugary tea and biccies.

Everyone knows if you make the tradespeople lots of tea, coffee and a bacon sandwich in the morning and slice of cake afternoon you get a good job done. Family friends always get offered tea and coffee. If I'm really busy I'll hand them a cup and point them to coffee machine.

Most of the visitors that myself and parents arrive, had a good hour's journey to get here. Always offer a drink. Got decaf in both tea and coffee plus sweeteners/sugar for those require these.

It's polite.

Similar to me ( I only have one cup of black coffee in the morning then drink water) but I do keep a small jar of coffee and a few tea bags for visitors but I have to remember to buy milk especially as I don’t usually have any in the house! If I’m expecting t visitors, my book club for instance, I do buy milk and also bake a cake.

My sister however just puts the kettle on as soon as she arrives to make a drink of tea but luckily she has it black so milk is not an issue. She usually provides me with a few tea bags to keep here so she’s not forced to drink stale ones!

"want a coffee" is used instead of "hello" in this house!

I don’t drink tea or coffee but I always offer them as soon as someone arrives. I’m always thirsty myself when I arrive somewhere so I wouldn’t want to leave a guest potentially thirsty. Plus the whole hospitality thing in general.

I usually offer a drink of some kind when people arrive, yes.

I can't vote though as I can't say the word "brew" or "brew up" without vomiting 😜

Offering a drink is the norm in our house and with mine and DH’s family too.

I’ve been in America for 15 years, and still
offer drinks within a few minutes of
someone coming. The difference here is that people rarely want tea (though I have it) and in summer everyone asks for cold drinks. I couldn’t imagine sitting around for an hour and no one even offering a cup of tea or glass of water.

100%. And if you’re not a tea drinker sure there’s always coffee, hot chocolate, coke, 7-up, mi wadi or god forbid a glass of water.

My MIL offers hot drinks in strict alternation approx every hour.

Within 5 mins of arrival/waking up - tea
Then coffee for a bit of caffeine
Then tea to rehydrate
Then coffee for a little pick me up
Then tea while you have a sit down and a rest
Then coffee, possibly made in a slightly different way this time or with different beans, for interest
Then tea because we might be getting into the lapsang souchong time of day by now
Etc

I love my MIL!!

I always offer, time of day, weather appropriate, drinks and snacks to anyone who comes to my house but this thread reminds of the joke/saying that you know someone really despises you in Ireland if they say, “you’ll have had your tea?”

This thread has reminded me of my lovely mum. She was in hospital for a long time, and we discovered that despite being very, very ill, she was hoarding biscuits/chocolates that visitors brought her so that she had something to offer the next visitor when they arrived 😭 💔

Its weird that you made it badly on purpose.

As for 'constantly' forgetting - it doesn't matter what you drink or don't drink, its just being polite. Are you inconsiderate in general?

I'm a tea addict and will always put the kettle on as soon as guests arrive. I offer guests a selection of hot and cold drinks, depending on what I have available, but whatever they choose I know I'm having a brew.

But hospitality rules varies. And England is by far the only place I've been where you would be offered a drink as soon as I get in, at all time of day, particularly a hot drink.

Ultimately experiences varies, which I think what that poster was trying to express. There is no 1 rule.

He’s your father in law, why the heck are you waiting to be asked? I’d reach for the kettle myself - he’s family!

I don’t drink hot drinks so I do genuinely forget to ask visitors if they want one!

But we are talking about someone just popping in for a quick chat? I am obviously offering people something if they are invited over for lunch or dinner or are spending hours at my house. I don’t actually own a kettle so I can’t put one on.

I don’t drink hot drinks and tbh rarely drink fizzy drinks. I just grab a water when walking by the fridge.

So no I don’t offer unless it’s a warm day / long visit and then it will be a can from the fridge.

I’ve talked about this with a friend before who’s the same and we figured it’s because we don’t but sitting down with having a cuppa so it’s not sit down have a cuppa and a natter. We just sit and natter.

It does seem to offended my mil hugely but she’s been told time and time again help herself. Though we don’t always have milk.

Strangely again if the children have friends round pop is always on offer. Hot drinks just don’t register.

I need tea at all times and would have to ask.

Hardly just British people.

I've been in people's homes in a variety of countries and hospitality is fairly international.
Generally in hotter countries I've been offered cold drinks first, but always offered a drink.

In France you don't. You would offer water if it's hot, although it wouldn't be uncommon to expect visitors to ask for water if they want some.

But after that it depends on the circumstances.

If your visitors are here for dinner or "apéro", you would generally offer them an alcoholic drink soon after they arrive.

You would offer tea or coffee to a family member or close friends if it's mid-afternoon (around 3-4pm), and it's person you usually do that with.

And generally you would offer a drink to someone when you're having one yourself.