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Original poster

Colleague sent me message by mistake

688 replies

Islandhopper10 · 03/10/2025 17:15

Our team work remotely but we get together quarterly in person. Yesterday was a meeting in the office in the morning followed by a social so it was casual dress.

I was messaging a colleague earlier back and forth about work matters and he sent something really random and then instantly deleted it but I saw it pop up as a notification so read it.

It said ‘she knew what she was doing in those leggings’ with a sweat emoji.

Now I was the only one wearing leggings yesterday so it was definitely about me. This was at about 3.30 today and I finished at 4 so nothing more was said and I expect my colleague thinks he deleted it before I saw it.

Would you say something if you were me or pretend/forget I ever saw it?

OP posts:
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BloodyBoilingInHere · 03/10/2025 17:38

You cant actually be sure he was talking about you though. Him and whoever he intended to message could've earlier been talking about someone else entirely in person and then continued the chat (inappropriately) over teams.

Likelihood is it was about you, but you cant be sure. I'd probably ignore it either way tbh.

Untailored · 03/10/2025 17:38

Euw. I’d hate to think male colleagues were discussing me like that. Some men are just gross.

I’d just ignore it though, it’s not really harassment so you can’t take it anywhere.

Naws · 03/10/2025 17:37

GooseAndSandals · 03/10/2025 17:35

Sorry to be crude but from a pervy male perspective maybe it depends on how tight the leggings are and how short the top is. 🐫

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All leggings are tight because they're leggings.

I can't imagine anyone would allow their arse to show in them in a professional setting though?

Let alone wear a cropped top.

Ponoka7 · 03/10/2025 17:35

Did you wear leggings with a short top?
People are allowed private conversations. Are you single? Could he have wanted to start a conversation about him fancying you?

randomgeneratedusername1 · 03/10/2025 17:35

To be fair I would take it as a compliment and forget about it if I actually looked hot in leggings . It’s highly possible he could’ve been responding to a video or meme he’d been sent . Misunderstandings happen .

GooseAndSandals · 03/10/2025 17:35

Naws · 03/10/2025 17:32

This is what's confusing me.

It does sound like that, but leggings??

No-one looks hot or not in leggings - they're just a wardrobe staple and worn correctly, all anyone else can see is material covered legs 🤷‍♂️

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Sorry to be crude but from a pervy male perspective maybe it depends on how tight the leggings are and how short the top is. 🐫

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 03/10/2025 17:34

Was the message on a work device?

gorlomi · 03/10/2025 17:34

AnyoneWhoHasAHeart · 03/10/2025 17:22

Has no-one on here ever looked at a bloke and said to a friend “OMG he’s hot/lush/<insert term of choice>”? Not ever?

Honestly the way in which people get worked up about these things,

The fact that we now have messaging etc means that what you say can potentially be seen by the person you’ve said it about, but anyone who says they’ve never made a comment about someone they’ve found attractive is lying.

Apparently not in the soulless, humourless land of the chronically po-faced.

i wonder how these women's husbands ever made a move without being reported for doing so.

gorlomi · 03/10/2025 17:32

123ZYX · 03/10/2025 17:24

Of course it’s sexist - it’s objectifying her. He wouldn’t have said the same about a man.

And I agree with reporting it and expecting chat logs to be reviewed. It’s not acceptable and employers are required to take reasonable steps to prevent sexual harassment.

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You're being ridiculous.

Balloonhearts · 03/10/2025 17:32

Islandhopper10 · 03/10/2025 17:31

What on earth does that mean?!

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It's a joke from legally blonde

Naws · 03/10/2025 17:32

GooseAndSandals · 03/10/2025 17:27

Sounds like you are humble-bragging OP.

This is what's confusing me.

It does sound like that, but leggings??

No-one looks hot or not in leggings - they're just a wardrobe staple and worn correctly, all anyone else can see is material covered legs 🤷‍♂️

gorlomi · 03/10/2025 17:32

PinkFrogss · 03/10/2025 17:23

That’s gross OP. I’m assuming it’s from a male colleague? I’d discuss with your line manager and ask that the chat logs are viewed. That kind of discussion is completely inappropriate for a workplace.

Absolutely ridiculous over reaction!

GooseAndSandals · 03/10/2025 17:31

Islandhopper10 · 03/10/2025 17:31

What on earth does that mean?!

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Legally blonde

Original poster
Islandhopper10 · 03/10/2025 17:31

Balloonhearts · 03/10/2025 17:28

Do the bend and snap. Then you'll know 🤣

What on earth does that mean?!

OP posts:
Diarygirlqueen · 03/10/2025 17:29

I would take it as a compliment and be secretly happy he thinks I look hot in my leggings, but then I'm in my forties with a saggy ass!
This wouldn't bother me, only you know yourself how you really feel.

Balloonhearts · 03/10/2025 17:28

Do the bend and snap. Then you'll know 🤣

GooseAndSandals · 03/10/2025 17:27

Sounds like you are humble-bragging OP.

123ZYX · 03/10/2025 17:24

gorlomi · 03/10/2025 17:18

It's a compliment about her looking hot in the leggings.

it's a turn of phrase. Not sexist what so ever

Show quote history

Of course it’s sexist - it’s objectifying her. He wouldn’t have said the same about a man.

And I agree with reporting it and expecting chat logs to be reviewed. It’s not acceptable and employers are required to take reasonable steps to prevent sexual harassment.

AnyoneWhoHasAHeart · 03/10/2025 17:23

WalkingtheWire · 03/10/2025 17:20

Whether the comment was a compliment or being derogatory, your male colleague is discussing your appearance with another (male?) colleague.

Thats not acceptable and personally I’d be approaching either him, his manager or HR.

Edited

And you of course have never said anything about anyone ever? Riiight.

TypeyMcTypeface · 03/10/2025 17:23

It's not appropriate for a work chat.

However, it might not have been about you - how do you know he was talking about yesterday's meeting with whoever it was - they could have been talking about some occasion outside work.

I say that to reassure you, not to detract from the inappropriateness of the comment.

PinkFrogss · 03/10/2025 17:23

That’s gross OP. I’m assuming it’s from a male colleague? I’d discuss with your line manager and ask that the chat logs are viewed. That kind of discussion is completely inappropriate for a workplace.

Marylou2 · 03/10/2025 17:23

I'd drop him a message just to say that you won't be wearing leggings again. That'll really make him sweat 😓 .

ThatLemonBear · 03/10/2025 17:23

It was meant to be a compliment, a bit sleazy but I’d be inclined to just ignore it TBH. Can any Teams user honestly say they haven’t sent a message that is a bit inappropriate (not about someone’s appearance, just generally) and would have been mortified if it had gone to the wrong person (which is easily done!)

AnyoneWhoHasAHeart · 03/10/2025 17:22

Has no-one on here ever looked at a bloke and said to a friend “OMG he’s hot/lush/<insert term of choice>”? Not ever?

Honestly the way in which people get worked up about these things,

The fact that we now have messaging etc means that what you say can potentially be seen by the person you’ve said it about, but anyone who says they’ve never made a comment about someone they’ve found attractive is lying.

gorlomi · 03/10/2025 17:21

HelloGreen · 03/10/2025 17:18

I’d report it and ask that IT look at their message logs.

CALM DOWN!!