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Original poster

Why do you allow your teen on Snapchat?

91 replies

KimGa · 02/10/2025 22:04

DS is about to turn 14. All his mates are on Snapchat, he’s coming to me daily upset that he’s left out because I won’t allow him to download it and that’s how they all communicate.

When he asked for it I read up on it and tried downloading it myself to see whether it would be ok. The Stories / discover page is absolutely full of soft core porn videos and loads of other crap. From what I have read it’s not possible to turn this feature off.

I’m shocked at all the other parents being ok with this app - do people not realise what it’s like or think it’s harmless?

I don’t want him to be left out but I don’t think I can say yes to this.

OP posts:
Original poster
KimGa · 03/10/2025 13:04

Thanks for everyone’s thoughts. When I say soft core porn on the discover page I mean girls in bikinis dancing about not actual sexual acts, it’s videos titled ‘she was cheated on with this hottie’ etc. All still pretty grim but I wonder if it would have been any different if I’d put my child’s age rather than my own when I set it up.

Unfortunately my son does have a tendency to watch lots of crappy short videos on YouTube if left alone with his laptop (teenagers playing practical jokes etc) so I’m not sure he’d have the self control not to watch this bit of the app if there’s no way to turn it off.

OP posts:
EarringsandLipstick · 02/10/2025 22:30

Honestly, the drama.

I have three teens. They also use Snapchat. That’s the only way they communicate with their friends. They have group chats for their sports, classes in school etc. They do nonsensical things (to me) mine have ‘streaks’ (uninterrupted days of quick ‘snaps’ (photos). It’s their world.

Do I have issues with their phone usage? Absolutely, yes.

My eldest (girl) was always fine. Easily self-regulated, needed very minimal supervision. Now 18. My 16 yo & 14 yo (boys) are nightmares with their phones, and so both still have limits, time restrictions etc.

However, that’s the wider issue of phone usage, not Snapchat. My DC got a phone only when going to secondary school (Ireland so that’s aged 12 or 13 here). I monitored their usage & messages initially. They didn’t see any porn or anything inappropriate on Snapchat, the fyp shows lots of stupid sports type stuff. It’s a time waste but not worrying in terms of content.

banning apps doesn’t help them regulate & learn. Much as I dislike Snapchat (the illiterate writing style mainly) I recognise it’s their world, and my job is to (try to) teach critical reasoning and self-regulation.

CrikeyMajikey · 02/10/2025 22:22

My teens and I have it. They turn off their location sharing. I’ve never seen any porn on it, may be that’s our wifi and family settings prohibiting access to it?
Kids use it to communicate.

Runningismyhappyplace50 · 02/10/2025 22:22

I have Snapchat (only use it to communicate with kids; all at secondary school) and I haven’t seen any thing like that on my feed.

Mine have it to communicate with friends they would be out of the loop if they didn’t have it.

Youngest had some issues but we discussed things and learnt from it.

StJulian2023 · 02/10/2025 22:15

Mine don’t have it. 14 and 16.

Mydadsbirthday · 02/10/2025 22:15

My teens have it and I also have it so I can message them on it - it’s the only thing they will reply to! I know of younger teens who have been bullied or cat fished on it so they weren’t allowed it until they were 14. They’re both in bed asleep now, they’re not allowed phones overnight.

TalkingToDogs · 02/10/2025 22:13

My son had it from 14 without any issues. My daughter is 16 and isn’t interested in using it.

I understand it causes issues with some kids but can only base it on your own children on how sensible they are etc. My son used it without any issues, he’s 21 now.

FattyMcFattyArse · 02/10/2025 22:13

Don't let them have it. It's truly awful. Feeling left out is a teen's best argument and you need to resist it. They will survive.

westcott · 02/10/2025 22:12

No no no.

OliviaBenson101 · 02/10/2025 22:11

I use it all the time, and have never seen anything like that. My older teens use it and have remained unscathed.

FabuIous · 02/10/2025 22:09

Just looked at my daugter’s and there’s nothing like that. She says they don’t look at that anyway. (She’s 17 now.)

She’s made friends through it, I don’t think it’s all negative.

AlphonsaAlpaca · 02/10/2025 22:08

My daughter doesn’t have it. She has a non-smart phone. Problem solved.

VikaOlson · 02/10/2025 22:08

My 15 year old isn't allowed snapchat or tiktok and it's just tough shit that everyone else's mum lets them.

Dinosweetpea · 02/10/2025 22:07

I don't allow my 13yo on Snapchat.
Completely unnecessary.

ExperiencedTeacher · 02/10/2025 22:06

My children will not have it. There are multiple issues with it. Location settings are default set to share your precise location at all times. Disappearing messages are clearly used for illicit purposes. I see no good from it at all and it’s a significant cause of problems at school

Rituelec · 02/10/2025 22:06

Having the same issue with 13yr old DD atm.