Boss told me to get off my personal phone in a meeting

I'm 50 and have spent a lot of wasted time in meetings with no real purpose!

It does depend on expectations. This would not be an issue for me. At my workplace (uni), most meetings are quite informal with people occasionally looking at their phones, nipping to the loo, and so on, while still being engaged.

There’s a difference between having them in the office and taking them into meetings and oggling at them instead of paying attention!

Being unprofessional in meetings isn’t family friendly.

I'm shocked at the amount of people who have their personal phones with them during actual meetings.

II wonder how many have worked in places where you aren't allowed them in the office ?

Being in a phone or screen in a meeting is bad enough in itself. Your personal phone is inexcusable and the cheek to blame your boss… I’d have words with you if you were reporting into me.

Sure. I’m 52.

I’m the boss and lead a culture that is family friendly.

I wouldn't ignore it.

ignore this op.

@Onetwobuckeroo

I can't believe you even have to ask. Of course YABU. Why on earth were you on your phone in a work meeting? Absolutely ridiculous to think you're not in the wrong here. Put your phone on DND at work!

Honestly, no way would anyone have got away with this kind of shit when I started work some 40 years ago, nor for many years after that. You'd get your phone taken off you, and get a bloody warning! I get that teenagers and children can't stay off their phones, but adults, and in the workplace?! That's terrible. Put your phone away!

And don't anyone give me 'what if the school or childminder needs you/if there's an emergency?' How the hell do you think people coped before mobile phones? They know where you are, they can ring your employer!

You claim to go above and beyond, (at work) but you can't be doing that if you're glancing at your phone half the time!

God I hate people on phones in meetings, have a tone set on your phone on the do not disturb so you 100% know when it’s “school” or “kids”

Ignoring the school who are messaging or calling about your child is shit parenting. Its the school, not a friend or some random person. Messaging and calls from them shoukd always be answered.

Not very professional at all. I'm sure you boss will be having words with HR. Restructure incoming.

@AgnesMcDoo In my workplace it would be completely fine but other workplaces are run by dinosaurs and it sounds like yours is.

Do you mind me asking how old you are? The change in attitude around the boss/employee relationship is absolutely fascinating to me.

The majority on thread will be parents. I am. I’m also a responsible worker who doesn’t take calls at work. You’ll see op has conceded she’s in the wrong

Correct

@Greenmouldycheese Your boss was wrong. All these people saying you are in the wrong either dont have children or are shit parents. Must be the same type of people who also can't wait to tell their 6 year old thay Santa isn't real.

What on earth are you talking about? How is doing your job well (and so keeping it) equal being a bad parent? Job security equals financial security which surely you’d agree can only be a positive?

This. @Onetwobuckeroo YABU. If there was the potential for a call/message (eg you were waiting for a call back/message about something important), you should ask at the beginning of the meeting if it’s ok to take it/read it. Otherwise phones should not be getting looked at. It’s something creeping into the workplace more and more and it’s not a good thing.

I have my child’s school set up on a filter. I get about 40 messages a day through the default system. Those go to a standard mailbox and I read them at my leisure.

if my phone actually pings from the school, I know the message came directly to me or was done through the emergency broadcast channel they use. It doesn’t matter where I am or what I am doing, I pick it up. If I am driving, I pull over as soon as I am safe and pick it up. I have a medically fragile SN child. Most of the time, it’s not an actual medical emergency, but it may have been.

So I’m of the opinion that I am an adult, I’ve already screened out the updates about bake sales, and if I need to check my phone quickly, I’m going to pick up my phone.

if I am in a rare super critical meeting where that would not be appropriate, then I have already discussed with DH that he is on point during that window and he knows that no matter what he picks up his phone, even if he is in a meeting.

I sometimes wonder what kind of prisons these people are working in

Isn't this why schools have more than 1 emergency contact for pupils. If contact 1 is unavailable then try contact 2

I guess it depends on the nature of the meeting but my immediate thought was it’s not a big deal to quickly check your phone! Clearly in the minority 😂

PS @Onetwobuckeroo Having kids does not give you priority. How do you know others in the meeting aren’t dealing with a parent with dementia? A close friend who’s seriously ill? Health problems nobody knows about? If you’ve chosen to work you should delegate childcare and any other responsibilities until your working day is over (apart from in an emergency, which would be a phone call surely?).

This

I think pulling you up on it afterwards rather than in front of everyone is more what I would expect if you have been there years.

I think it's industry-specific. In financial services we were all glancing down at lender alertsand emails from clients as sometimes you'd need to shoot out and call someone immediately.