Boss told me to get off my personal phone in a meeting

Your boss was wrong. All these people saying you are in the wrong either dont have children or are shit parents. Must be the same type of people who also can't wait to tell their 6 year old thay Santa isn't real.

I think it depends on what the meeting was, and how serious it was. I have several meetings where it wouldn’t be appropriate but also several where there are lulls or bits I’m not needed for 100% and a quick check of who has messaged is fine . Only really you will know if it’s appropriate or not.

Not in a meeting op. I turn my phone over so it doesn’t distract me if something flashes. In the event of an emergency the numbers marked as emergency contacts would flash through.

That’s a bit overkill, it takes seconds to read a message. Declaring it like that is more disruptive!

@Onetwobuckeroo I don’t have kids but if I did, I’d have it nearby always and check any messages from the school as they appeared in a general work meeting. I wouldn’t however in a more critical stakeholder or eg disciplinary staff and take the chance nothing urgent comes in from the school. So that would be my compromise.

I however, not having kids, never check my phone during meetings but would if I’m expecting say a telephone consultation with GP or anything else medical related. If it was a critical meeting I’d be upfront about it and apologise and warn in advance that I’ll need to potentially answer the phone so at least the boss would know of my circs upfront.

In my workplace it would be completely fine but other workplaces are run by dinosaurs and it sounds like yours is.

I always find the complete deference with which people speak about bosses and managers on here massively surprising because it doesn't track a bit with what I've ever experienced in any professional environment. They might be in a senior role but you're still colleagues. Quickly checking a message on your phone that you think could be urgent isn't scrolling social media, surely most people would understand that someone who's otherwise on the ball in meetings can afford to look away for a couple of seconds and give other people that same allowance.

In my organisation that would be ok in a team meeting, not in a more formal one, unless it was a particularly sensitive part of the team meeting (dealing with a personal / personnel issue). I think you know your organisation and what the general rules of behaviour are.

"Their outburst"

You "pulled your boss up"

You should be embarrassed. That was inappropriate behaviour at a work meeting and to try to call your boss on your poor work behaviour, wow. You might be getting way too comfortable if you've been there a long time and your boss is giving you a heads up about that.

@HollieBolly I think your boss was in the wrong to do this. We're not living in Dickens times, work has to fit around people's needs

Are you serious? I’m genuinely interested: how old are you?

You’ve been there too long and got way too comfortable.

@Onetwobuckeroo (They don’t have kids).

That point is irrelevant.

I think I would work on the basis that messages aren't urgent but phone calls may be. Would never have a problem with people answering the phone because e.g. with GP appointments etc now they seem to ring at any time of day and I would want people to allow me the same courtesy.

I sometimes sneakily check my phone for messages in online meetings but wouldn't in in person ones or ones where I am actively participating.

I would be grumpy about being called out for it because I think as long as you aren't taking the piss it comes under the "take" section of give and take. But I wouldn't have had an argument about it because it's definitely something that's up for debate so if I'd been told off I would have sucked it up.

Yes of course you were wrong OP. Your boss is paying you for your time, therefore when you are at work you concentrate on work. Can you imagine: we didn’t have phones attached to us once upon a time? My 24 year old DD messages messages me very regularly when I’m working with ‘very important’ stuff (non emergency) and she persists in being baffled as to why I don’t respond until my working day has ended. The entitled generation - it’s getting ‘soooo old’, as she’d undoubtedly say.

Sorry op but you were been unreasonable. I’ve been brought up on this by my boss before, we’re so used to checking our phones all the time I don’t think we realise how rude it is. I needed the wake up call and hopefully this will be one for you.

Depends on the message I think. If it was “we’ve gone into lockdown due to reports of a man with a gun in the vicinity” (I actually received this from DD1’s nursery on my second day back at work after maternity leave) then I think YANBU.

If it was “reminder that class 3 are having a bake sale after school tomorrow to raise funds for the PTA” then I think YABU.

Would you? I bet you bloody wouldn’t for a personal message if you were speaking. You clearly have no concept of professional courtesy.

Was just going to post the same, very refreshing.

I completely agree with this. It’s perfectly normal in the professional environment I work in.

The suggestion to announce you are leaving the room to check a message is far more disruptive than quickly glancing at the screen while the meeting continues. People would think you’d gone crazy if you did that in my world.

I think it's bad manners. I don't see what's so important it can't wait til a break if it's a long meeting or until the end of the meeting.

It annoys the hell out of me when my managers call meetings and then proceed to wander in and out and generally prat around on their phones.

quite

I think you were rude - looking at your phone whilst others are speaking is rude.

If any of my colleagues did this in a meeting I would think they had lost the plot. This is far more disruptive than the OP just quietly reading a message on her phone.

No. Workers fit around work that’s the point. The transaction is you give up your time in return for a salary. Expectation is work isn’t interrupted by your external life

Can't remember the last time I saw an OP respond in such a reflective and positive way, just taking in what people said and thinking about it without getting defensive.

I’m on my phone pretty much permanently through meetings. both my work and personal phone.

if I couldn’t multi task my boss would need to extend my budget/headcount to allow for the resources it would take to do things one at a time.

fortunately my boss is not an arsehole and would never call me out in the manner the OP was called out. Nor would I call out any of my team like this. If I witnessed one of my directs behave in this way to their teams I would be horrified. In short no one I know would be so rude as to publicly try and shame a member of their team.