Is fatphobia a real thing?

That's simply not true.

Smoking is reviled by society. It can't even be shown on TV before the watershed and is banned in most public places. Smoking carries a massive stigma. It's absolutely socially acceptable to say that smoking is disgusting and tell people to quit than it would be to say being fat is disgusting and fat people need to lose weight, even though quitting smoking is also very hard to do.

The same for alcoholism, alcoholics are mocked, insulted and looked down on by most of society. It's seen as a huge moral failing and not as a valid illness.

And bikers also get a lot of flack. I believe many A & E nurses refer to motorcyclists as "organ bags". Outside of health issues, bikers are widely associated by society with being scary, criminal and violent. See numerous jokes about Dads having aneurisms when their daughters meet boyfriends with motorbikes.

If you'd said "horse riders" and we were looking at types of risky behaviour associated with the upper classes, you might have something of a point...

But the problem with obesity isn't that it kills you early, necessarily. It's that it might result in you having a very poor quality of life for the final 10-20 years of your life, struggling along with joint pain, a bad back, sleep apnoea, breathing difficulties, diabetes and so on. I'm witnessing it with my inlaws unfortunately.

As someone who was fat from the beginning - infant school onwards - I never felt it was a case of letting myself go and allowing this to happen, it was how I was. I always wanted a fat jab. Now there is one. It’s not what I’d prefer - one shot and you are miraculously slim - you have to still work at it and of course pay for it. Even with the jab it’s not been a sudden dramatic change for me, I was working at it for a couple of years beforehand. But it’s an improvement for sure.

To despise is to hold in contempt, which doesn't imply outright hatred to me, and I agree that would be a bit much.

It's not connected to my ideas of beauty and attractiveness.

I have respect and admiration for obese people who are actually making efforts to sort themseleves out, and they should be freely given as much help as they need.

I think it's more nuanced than people imply.

Obesity is a public health crisis and health professionals, politicians and others should be able to talk about that and the reasons or it without fear of being seen as "fatphobic".

Fat activists have been telling us for years that excess fat can be healthy (which it can't, obesity in itself is a health risk), we're wrong if we don't find overweight attractive and fat bodies are beautiful. But then the jabs became available and it turns out most of them didn't think they were beautiful enough to keep.

It's also true that we live in a society where not being overweight is a difficult choice that the vast majority of us have to work really hard at and for some it's harder than others. It's not all about individual choices to be fat.

It should be OK to discuss the risks of obesity, it's OK to worry about a family member carrying a lot of overweight (in the same way as we worry about family members who smoke or drink too much) but it's NOT OK to make fun of people's bodies. Bullying and using rude language is never OK. Someone's body shape or size is completely irrelevant to the police unless it's in descriptive terms to locate or identify someone. They shouldn't be commenting.

I should add let he/she who is without sin cast the first stone!

Being alive is the main cause of death - 100% effective. We all only have so long on the planet.

Obesity is one of the leading causes of death and illness, and is a selfish use of food and medical resources. Being underweight isn't.

Anyone allowing this to happen to themselves and inflicting it on others because they can't/won't control their appetite is not deserving of indulgence.

I’ve certainly sensed that feeling of being despised before by a trimmer workmate. Horrible. This was also someone who, when someone died, liked to point out whatever he felt the person had done in terms of lifestyle to cause their own death. I think it was a form of self-preservation. A lot of people do it. But he was particularly smug.

@StripyShirt not that I want to pile on, but surely "despise" is a bit strong? You can judge a lack of action or against your personal standards of beauty/attractiveness etc. Contempt is one thing but hatred is quite another.

@StripyShirt can I ask why you actually despise obese people? As in, what form does that take internally for you? Do you think that's a reasonable position to hold? Do you think you are successful at hiding your views when you are forced to interact with someone who is obese? I think that despising someone might be quite hard to cover up.

Thankfully, I am now just a bit overweight, so I guess you might just dislike me a bit, rather than despise me, as you would have done previously when I was morbidly obese.

Exactly, hypothyroidism is very easy to treat. It's harder to diagnose but treatment is generally just oral medication. In hyperthyroidism they actually will sometimes damage the thyroid because it's easy to meditate.

Do you despise people who are underweight? I mean it's not difficult...take some responsibility and eat more...

But why "despise" them?

In answer to @TattooStan, I believe drunks are judged harshly because their drunken behaviour often - usually in fact - impacts others round them, either because they become violent, or abusive or irresponsible.

What would make you despise someone for a reason like that? There are lots of superficial things I don't like about people because they aren't to my taste, but despise them for it is so strange. In fact, I'd say that kind of attitude is actually more despicable than physical appearances could ever be.

To be brutally honest, I despise obese people. Hopefully, this would never show, however, as everyone deserves to be treated with respect, dignity, and kindness.

Yes, there are some conditions that cause or contribute to this condition that are nobody's fault, but the majority simply eat too much and refuse to take personal responsibility.

We don't see many obese people in areas hit by famine, do we?

Really? I think a boozer who endlessly props up the bar at their local can probably interact sensibly most of the time, but they're still harshly judged for being a boozer.

And no, my username is a reference to something else entirely - an old xfm radio show! 😅 I'm not called Stan either!

Yes but the distinction is between simply not liking the look of something and thinking it is a justifiable basis for rude and derogatory comments, or for treating someone as somehow lesser.

Yes of course it's a thing.

How's your voting supposed to work?

Well yes that’s the point isn’t it! The oh I don’t judge threads are rubbish. It’s an evolutionary imperative, it’s why we have survived. It’s why I need to know if the person I am alone with is male or female

He isn't fat phobic he is a horrible misogynist. Who incidentally is also overweight.

Also do I infer from your username you have tattoos?

We can all be judgmental about appearances ...

Wow.

A pissed person is judged harshly because they cannot interact sensibly, not because their face is ruddy.

I think heavy drinkers, smokers and motorcyclists DO get the same level of vitriol.
Noone minds someone 1 stone overweight, in the same way noone minds someone who drinks half a bottle of wine at the weekend, or likes the odd pint. But, I guess if we're using this analogy, an obese person is like an alcoholic - pissed up, damaged liver, ruddy face - and they ARE harshly judged.

I had a former MD tell me she wouldn’t employ a fat person. And that member of staff who was overweight surprised her and actually works hard and isn’t lazy

Made me feel awful as a person whose weight has fluctuated up and down and if I’d applied for work there at the ‘wrong’ time I would have been rejected

I think there's also an innate sense of revulsion when we perceive others to have taken more than their fair share of resources. We're animals, and for many thousands of years life hasn't been this cushy. We used to live in tribes hunting and gathering food, obtaining food was the bulk of our work and if we didn't make sure what we had went around everyone some people would starve. So when we see really overweight people (not just a bit overweight, obese) I do think there's this subconscious revulsion/anger as if that person has deprived others of food by hoarding and scoffing the lot.

Obviously most of us don't have to live like that now thankfully, someone eating triple their needed calories doesn't mean I can't get enough calories. But I don't think evolution can change our psychology that quickly.