To want my child to have cosmetic surgery?

If she’s not bothered by them then I would leave it for now. When and if she does get bothered by them that’s when I would look at options.

But the fact that the daughter has brought it up and used "elf ears" when she hasnt before, suggests that this may now be an issue if some little shit at school has started pointing out her ears.

I had mine done privately as an adult two years ago. It was easy and a pain free recovery but I hear that is rare. I wish I’d had it done as a child, I was a very insecure teen and young adult.

My parents had mine done in the 90s when I was at primary and I'm glad they did because I had a visible difference. I don't remember it being sore but I do remember the hideous bandages round my head lol x

But OP doesn't think they are having a big impact- she's trying to preempt this?

My childhood friend’s sister had prominent ears and had her ears pinned back (no idea on how it was done), that was in early 90s. Sometimes these things need to be done if they’re having a big impact. Do whatever’s right for your DD and ignore strong views from very opinionated outsiders if they come up.

I had a squint that my parents wouldnt allow me to have surgery for "in case it went wrong". My dad was squeamish about eyes, that was why.

So I was bullied mercilessly for years. Needless to say DS got his op as soon as he could.

Kids are shits and will pick on anything. I agree that doing it now before senior school would be best, the bullies at that age are a feral pack of animals if they smell any insecurity, and if a kid isnt insecure about their perceived "difference" bullies will make sure that they soon are.

There are several children in my extended family with ears that stick out. They’re siblings. All equally noticeable. But only one of them has ever been remotely bothered by it. She was super self-conscious and got picked on, and she had hers pinned back when she was about 15. None of her siblings disliked their identical ears, though - one of them jokes about his but he doesn’t dislike them and would be quite hurt if it was suggested he ought to have anything done about them. They’re all adults or older teens now and totally happy.

For that reason, I’d say don’t suggest it to her unless she makes it clear that it’s really bothering her. Just because she said she’s got ‘elf ears’ doesn’t mean she hates her ears or feels there’s something wrong with them.

You are highly, highly unlikely to get this done on the NHS.

You obviously do think there’s something wrong or you wouldn’t even consider entertaining the idea of surgically altering your young child for the purposes of aesthetics. Would you also tell her to have a boob job if you considered people were making fun of her too flat chest, or tell her she needs a BBL or a nose job?

Cant even believe people are encouraging this. If she’s insecure it’ll be because you haven’t taught her the true beauty in who she is - big prominent ears included.

I had mine done about 40 years ago. I was having kids be unkind to me and hated going to school, I came home in tears a lot.
Glad I had it done.

How is it a "flaw" :/. I'm honestly shocked by the attitudes on this thread.

I'm absolutely, 100% against any kind of optional surgery for children...), but this I would do without hesitation

eh? This is an optional surgery for a child ..

My son has a squint and we have put his name down for the surgery purely for the bullying reason. He should get it as a toddler/before school. We’ve already had 5-7year olds say to us/him “why is he cock eyed”.

Used to be a very common surgery on the NHS in the early 90s. Remember lists of 'bilateral repair of bat ears' on small children. It's horrible that anyone makes mean comments so I'd speak to your GP for advice to see what options might be available.

Yes, do it.
DH had his done as a child (under 10ish). I've seen the 'before' photos and they really were pretty bad.
It shouldn't matter. But it does.

A friends DD had very "elfish" ears.
Had them pinned back as a child-maybe around 10?
She was just noticing and they were very prominent.
100% would do it.

Mine were very 'bat' and the NHS pinned them back in 1969, when I was 7, so I must have been one of the first! I was very self conscious of them and my Mum (love her foresight) pushed for it. Go for it.

I don’t know about now, but remember knowing several people at school or as a child getting their ears pinned back. I think it’s recommended to have the procedure done when younger actually.

Mine were very 'bat', and the NHS pinned them back in 1969, when I was 7, so I must have been one of the first! I was very, very self conscious of them, and my mum (love her foresight) pushed for it.

I would wait at least until she hits puberty as she may grow into them - or by then you may realise it's not a big deal and elf ears are part of her look. 8 is too young. Also this is so rare, but a boy in my brother's class at school sadly died from a reaction to the anaesthetic when he was having his ears pinned back. I know this is so unlikely to happen, but I would never let one of my kids have a general anaesthetic for a unnecessary cosmetic procedure, especially one as young as yours. This was in the early 90s though so maybe it's not done under general anaesthetic anymore.

My son had his done when he was 8. Other people had started making comments but he hadn’t noticed yet, I wanted to nip it in the bud before he got insecure or any proper teasing began. He’s 16 now and he’s very grateful he got it done. We didn’t get it on the NHS, had to pay privately

It's all down to western beauty standards and that fact that people can't keep their mouths shut. Why not teach her body confidence?

In Korea people are actually having procedures to make their ears stick out!

My nan said DD had pixie ears, it was a term of endearment and I love her slightly pointy ears, although admittedly they don't stick out.
So elf ears doesn't sound bad to me, it sounds cute, but context and tone is everything.
Is she self conscious and upset by them?
I would ne nervous putting my child through an operation that wasn't technically necessary but if they were very distressed by their ears I would certainly consider it. I think ear pinning used to be more common for my parents generation don't really hear of it now.

I’m not familiar with the criteria so don’t know how realistic it is but if it is possible to have it done I would do it. It’s easy to talk about body confidence and positivity but let’s be honest nobody would really want to have protruding sticky out ears so if it’s relatively minor and minimal risk associated I would 100% do it before high school, as we know kids can be awful and if I could prevent bullying before it happened I would. I’m sure people who shame you for doing something for vanity or making you feel bad about wanting to change your daughters appearance will happily get their child braces (obviously I know there’s slightly more risk associated with surgery but ultimately the goal is the same… it’s cosmetic)

My best friend at school had his done when we were about 10. Everyone liked him, but they did make fun of him and he felt so much better once they were done. I’d just get it done asap with minimal fuss.