Am I ungrateful because DP didn’t buy the calendar I wanted before it sold out?

Hear hear

I agree … but I was in a hurry and just picked the wrong one by mistake… have you never made a silly mistake in your life

🤣🤣 I am one of the unfortunate men who need a product or 2 to look slightly reasonable, but if my wife forgot to buy me my special face lotion … I would not send her to a Siberian gulag

Sorry but I feel like you're definitely being ungrateful and materialistic because you're focused SOLELY on what you didn't get and how that made you feel.

From your husband's point of view, it probably felt like he was trying to do something thoughtful and generous by offering to buy the beauty calendar for you. That gesture came from a place of love — wanting to treat you and take something off your plate. When it sold out, it likely frustrated him too, as he planned on getting it for you as a gift, and went to the store to do so. Hearing your disappointment probably felt like criticism of his effort.

From this angle, he may see your reaction as focusing more on the missed item than on the intention behind the gift. To him, being told "I would’ve bought it myself" could sound like you're disregarding the fact that he was trying to do something nice — even if the timing didn’t work out.

So when he says you’re being ungrateful, it isn't so much about the beauty calendar itself, but how he felt dismissed after trying to do something kind for you and the fact that your reaction was based on his inability to buy you a material object that, in the grand scheme of your relationship, is far less valuable than having a partner that wants to make you happy when life is going a bit rough.

@DeltaC

its not hard to pick out spaghetti in the supermarket…

L

In a self-centred world, yes it isn’t, couldn’t agree with you more

Sabotage! Thats a bit harsh, if I was about to buy something and my oh offered to buy it for me, I would say well get onto the web site now its......and get him to do it there and then. It's start of October, im sure when you said they sell out fast he probably thought he had more time. How long after him offering and him trying to buy?

Oui

No I get her what she wants but if I make a genuine as she does from time to time I expect a level of grace … just like I give her … this is a trivial matter … what will she do if he forgets to pick up the kids at nursery or school… now that’s big

20 pages of debate when the simple answer is if you don’t like what he’s done and you think it’s unacceptable, end the relationship. Stop talking about it on here, and do both of you a favour and end it. You clearly both have different values and priorities.

How many times have you seen something online and clicked and it’s gone … let me tell you where I am coming from … my wife doesn’t like pasta but she will have spaghetti and nothing else … apparently this is something stemming from one of her pregnancies…I worked 52 miles away from home … one day she was really unwell … normally she did the school run stuff and cooked tea because of my long commute … on this day I phoned her from work and said I will knock of earlish , please relax I will come and prepare tea etc. we agreed easiest thing was spaghetti but there was none in the house so I would pick up on my way home … in my haste I picked up linguine instead of spaghetti and only realised when I got home , apologised, but it was too late to go to shops again. She was really angry at me … and I’m like surely you would have to have such a negative view of me to have thought I did this deliberately when I know how you hate any other pasta … ungrateful

I agree with @NessShanessthis thread is batshit mental, and most posters seem incapable of reading! 🙄

Are you this dismissive towards your wife?

Make that two!

@DeltaC

what makes you think he does loads for her if he can’t even be bothered to click a few buttons on his phone to order a calander that he had said he would buy her?? Sounds lazy and complacent to me…

I bet there are loads of alternatives … she is just being petty

@DeltaC

its a nice calendar that looks nice and contains products that the OP likes. Hardly rocket science…🙄

Fuckall you say … I bet that husband does loads for her … and she is choosing to major on this minor … but

No I meant what’s so special about this one …does it have a small human actually applying the products on OP … befuddled

She was going to buy it herself but her partner said he was going to buy it.

@DeltaC

well how can she be ungrateful…to have been given fuck all by her husband.

They never said you should be grateful, they said you are being ungrateful….don’t sound same

Guaranteed this thread would have gone so differently if the OP had wanted tickets to an almost sold out exhibition or a first edition in that was in auction. God forbid she wanted to buy a frivolous lady product to treat herself.

Why didn’t she just buy it herself? With her own money that she earns herself?
An advent calendar isn’t a Christmas present … it’s bought weeks/months before Christmas.
Sorry, but if I wanted an Advent beauty calendar the I would buy it myself. DH would buy me a Christmas Present.