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Original poster

Am I ungrateful because DP didn’t buy the calendar I wanted before it sold out?

657 replies

Gillinggold · 01/10/2025 17:28

I had a shit week last week and DP knew I was browsing beauty calendar’s. He asked which one I liked and I told him the name of the one I was going to buy.

He told me not to buy it and that he’d treat me to it as one of his Christmas presents to me. I was really grateful and said it sells out quick so to be aware of that.

Lo and behold, he’s gone to buy it and it’s sold out and not coming back in stock. I was annoyed, said I really had my eye on it and would have happily brought it myself as originally intended.

He says I’m being ungrateful and that it’s not his fault. Well, I told him he’d need to get a move on at the time and feel really annoyed now….

OP posts:
Cucy · 04/10/2025 18:32

It depends how long he waited.

If you told him there was only a couple left and he waited 2 weeks, then I’d be annoyed.

But I wouldn’t have thought an advent calendar would sell out in October.

If you knew that it sells out so soon, then I would have bought it and asked DH to just transfer me the money for it.

LT1982 · 04/10/2025 18:31

LoisGriffinskitchen · 01/10/2025 18:36

£260 on an advent calendar as “one” of your Xmas presents! 😮

I mean great if that’s your budget but dear god I live in another world.

Look, most of these advent calendars are not worth the amount you pay for them despite what the manufacturer says.

I got the M&S one for £50 last year which was lovely. Hell would freeze over before I paid more than that though.

I tend to buy what I want though anf tell people to donate to the hospice/elsewhere if they want to buy me gifts.

I must have missed the part where OP asked for judgy opinions on the price of a treat she wanted to buy herself

Justaspy · 04/10/2025 18:30

Give your head a wobble, it was just a beauty calendar.

SexRealist20 · 04/10/2025 18:29

Why date a man who drains you? A partner should add to your life not ruin it. You deserve better. These men deserve to be lonely.

SexRealist20 · 04/10/2025 18:26

Gillinggold · 01/10/2025 17:28

I had a shit week last week and DP knew I was browsing beauty calendar’s. He asked which one I liked and I told him the name of the one I was going to buy.

He told me not to buy it and that he’d treat me to it as one of his Christmas presents to me. I was really grateful and said it sells out quick so to be aware of that.

Lo and behold, he’s gone to buy it and it’s sold out and not coming back in stock. I was annoyed, said I really had my eye on it and would have happily brought it myself as originally intended.

He says I’m being ungrateful and that it’s not his fault. Well, I told him he’d need to get a move on at the time and feel really annoyed now….

Buy it for yourself & dump him.
You need someone who adds to your life, not makes it worse

LT1982 · 04/10/2025 18:25

YANBU. This was low effort in a) not putting any thought into your xmas gift and b) delaying the purchase meaning it sold out. Next time order it for yourself and use his card!

AhBiscuits · 04/10/2025 18:24

DeltaC · 04/10/2025 18:19

You are being ungrateful … it’s only a calendar. I am a man and if my wife was angry at me for such … I would never offer to do anything for her again…

I'm sure that would be a big relief for her, as then she might actually get what she wants.

nosleepforme · 04/10/2025 18:22

Ungrateful? Lol, it’s not like he got it and you couldn’t be bothered saying thanks!

EarthlyNightshade · 04/10/2025 18:21

DeltaC · 04/10/2025 18:19

You are being ungrateful … it’s only a calendar. I am a man and if my wife was angry at me for such … I would never offer to do anything for her again…

But..... in this case, the man didn't do anything for her
so what is your point?

cheekybtch · 04/10/2025 18:20

How are you being ungrateful if you didn't even get it? I don't understand why people are saying you're ungrateful. You would have happily bought it yourself and in good time, probably, but he offered to (which was nice in itself) but in the time he took to go and get it, it sold out. Being ungrateful if when you're given something and don't appreciate it. If you didn't even get what you wanted and would've got it if you could've just been allowed to buy it yourself, you're allowed to be pissed off. If I was your partner, I'd apologise for not being able to get it like I said rather than calling you ungrateful. It's not like he queued all night and bought some magical special edition version and you didn't like it!

DeltaC · 04/10/2025 18:19

You are being ungrateful … it’s only a calendar. I am a man and if my wife was angry at me for such … I would never offer to do anything for her again…

Griff1963 · 04/10/2025 18:06

Dont sweat the small stuff... And its ALL small stuff!!

alfonzi · 04/10/2025 12:41

Cherrytree86 · 04/10/2025 06:14

Because years ago I was scratched by one and got a bad infection. They are unpredictable animals. And I could never be doing with an indoor cat that used a litter tray 🤢

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I don’t hate them but I would never want to get one and I agree the whole litter tray thing would gross me out. And wouldn’t want them crapping in my neighbours garden etc either.

Hadn’t heard of a beauty calendar before this thread but from what I’ve heard of it I’d also prefer one to a cat and it would work out cheaper in the long run as it’s not cheap to be a (responsible) pet owner!

I find them unpredictable too - I was scratched on two desperate occasions by them in childhood/teen years and was bare legged on both occasions. Thankfully didn’t get an infection though.

I had a mate whose aunty tripped over theirs and hurt themselves badly- I think that’s not that uncommon as they creep around so quietly so you don’t always see them .

Even if I did like them , as someone slightly accident prone who has been known to trip on a few occasions 👀 I think I’d be asking for trouble to have one slinking around getting under my feet 😂

But the bottom line is Op or anyone else can spend her money as they see fit. It’s daft to say why don’t you spend your money on X or Y thing - because we are all different!

Some people like A,B and C while you may like X,Y,Z. It’s really not a hard concept to understand.

Sadworld23 · 04/10/2025 12:03

Grammarnut · 03/10/2025 22:03

It's only a calendar. Buy another one.

Hot Wheels Advent Calendar 2025 | Smyths Toys UK https://share.google/SCgEZTzoRPgNvt0UH

This one should be ok as a substitute

Sadworld23 · 04/10/2025 12:01

SewNotHappy · 01/10/2025 18:25

Ungrateful? He didn't buy it! Offer him a blow job to make up then don't give it to him, if he complains tell him he's being ungrateful.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Doubleraspberry · 04/10/2025 10:10

Theoturkeyflieseast · 03/10/2025 06:55

I'd love one of those calendars
But I'm vegan ,so would need it vegan and cruelty free .
Plusi expect I wouldn't know what to do with most of the stuff in it

There are quite a few vegan cruelty free calendars and many are not that expensive. Have a google and see what appeals to you.

Doubleraspberry · 04/10/2025 10:06

NessShaness · 03/10/2025 08:06

There has been a link posted, and lots of us have told her to check in store - my local one still has stock.

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The link that’s been posted more than once is just a blog affiliate link that takes you to SNK’s website, where it’s sold out. The waitlist on there is for the 2026 calendar, believe it or not!

Ebay resellers will be the only option with, obviously, a hefty premium.

@Gillinggold if there were specific products in it you chose it for, Vinted will have them, and depending on DP’s level of will (suspect low from his ‘ungrateful’ comment) he could buy them for you there. And you could then get one of the others you like a bit less for the advent calendar experience.

BTW I’ve bought my own anxious autistic DD her own beauty advent calendar. (She’s already got a cat.)

Cherrytree86 · 04/10/2025 06:16

Allthatshines1992 · 03/10/2025 20:44

It seems people aren't using it as an actual advent calendar. The OP mentioned it would count as one as of her Christmas presents and someone else mentioned using the contents for the next year. Sounds like more of a gift hamper than a calendar.

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@Allthatshines1992

no. It is a calendar. You open a box each day in December and use the product as and when you want. That’s part of the niceness - the seeing what’s for today element. It’s not a hamper.

Cherrytree86 · 04/10/2025 06:14

Allthatshines1992 · 03/10/2025 20:51

Why do you hate cats?

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Because years ago I was scratched by one and got a bad infection. They are unpredictable animals. And I could never be doing with an indoor cat that used a litter tray 🤢

Bloodylovecheese · 03/10/2025 22:55

Gillinggold · 01/10/2025 17:28

I had a shit week last week and DP knew I was browsing beauty calendar’s. He asked which one I liked and I told him the name of the one I was going to buy.

He told me not to buy it and that he’d treat me to it as one of his Christmas presents to me. I was really grateful and said it sells out quick so to be aware of that.

Lo and behold, he’s gone to buy it and it’s sold out and not coming back in stock. I was annoyed, said I really had my eye on it and would have happily brought it myself as originally intended.

He says I’m being ungrateful and that it’s not his fault. Well, I told him he’d need to get a move on at the time and feel really annoyed now….

There's a wait list

🤐😬

Am I ungrateful because DP didn’t buy the calendar I wanted before it sold out?
pinkyredrose · 03/10/2025 22:28

Allthatshines1992 · 02/10/2025 23:04

You asked a question but I'm not sure you wish to engage in more dialogue (there is a lot which could be said on this topic but don't want to derail the thread). You are correct that no-one asked to be born. But if someone voluntarily creates and births a new human being the new human being has to come first at all times. The lives of their parents are not as valuable (imo). The parents are no longer the main characters in their story and become redundant human beings whose purpose is to elevate the next generation they have created.

Edited
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Now i know why the laughing emoji was taken away.

pinkyredrose · 03/10/2025 22:17

Allthatshines1992 · 02/10/2025 19:55

Spend it on the mentally ill child

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Bloody hell. You really do have an axe to grind.

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 03/10/2025 22:04

Grammarnut · 03/10/2025 22:03

It's only a calendar. Buy another one.

Ah, not all calendars are made equal.

Grammarnut · 03/10/2025 22:03

It's only a calendar. Buy another one.

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 03/10/2025 22:02

Allthatshines1992 · 03/10/2025 20:44

It seems people aren't using it as an actual advent calendar. The OP mentioned it would count as one as of her Christmas presents and someone else mentioned using the contents for the next year. Sounds like more of a gift hamper than a calendar.

Show quote history

Huh? Of course people are using the contents for the next year…they aren’t going to use the whole product on the day they open the numbered box.
the only people I know who open the whole calendar in one go are ‘influencers’.
i’m assuming the OP meant part of her present, but to be given early.

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