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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Do you or did you leave 1 year old alone in the lounge?

70 replies

andanotherproblem · 30/09/2025 21:26

My DD is 1.5 years old, she is a very busy girl, constantly walking around, climbing on and off the sofa or trying to climb on anything and everything, she will not sit for even a minute unless she’s in her high chair or pram, I’m sure like most 1 year olds, she’s a walking hazard, constantly falling over, head first into the wall/tv unit, off the sofa etc. I have never left her in the lounge by herself as she is a hazard when I’m there let alone when I’m not, my family have started commenting on this recently asking why I bring her to the toilet with me or in the kitchen etc, surely it’s normal to constantly have eyes on her, curious what others do/think

OP posts:
scaredfriend · 01/10/2025 18:53

Yes. By 15 months ish DD had free flow throughout our (small) downstairs area so would toddle between kitchen-diner and lounge. I’d cook in the kitchen whilst she was ‘reading’ in the living room, for example. The house was pretty baby-proof so the only way she’d have hurt herself would be to climb on the sofas and fall, but she’d never shown any interest in doing that so it wasn’t a concern really.

Blablibladirladada · 01/10/2025 18:52

1,5?
of course you can’t leave them alone…that is a weird comment to make…probably the same that will shame you if anything happens…

Sillysallysausage · 01/10/2025 18:52

Yes I did while I made a drink or went for a wee or something, and I have twins. But I had baby proofed the downstairs and we had a total of 5 baby stair gates in various places around the house so they didn't kill themselves 😂

ishimbob · 01/10/2025 18:50

autumneves · 01/10/2025 18:16

MN love playpens but I don’t know anyone with one! IME they just whinge to get out of them.

I tried the play pen thing and I never found the window

Mine went from very calm and placid as babies when it wasn't necessary to whirling dervishes who could climb out/unlock a play pen with ease basically overnight. I think it might have had a week of proper use with each!

ColdWaterDipper · 01/10/2025 18:47

Yes, I left both of mine- eldest by himself and youngest with his 3 year old brother. Just for short periods of time like popping into another room or upstairs, or nipping to the loo or into the garden. I wouldn’t have left them to go to the shops or anything! Neither of my children have been clingy and I think maybe because we never made a big deal about popping in and out of rooms and leaving them for short bits, really helped with that. We had a stair gate upstairs so they couldn’t fall down, but they had access to a few steps into the kitchen from the sitting room and going the other way into the playroom. We also had a wood burning stove in a big inglenook fireplace. Right from when they could crawl at 6 months old we were strict about not going anywhere near the fire (on or off) and going backwards down stairs, and they just seemed to have absorbed that information by the time they were walking at 11/12 months.

Mammabear23 · 01/10/2025 18:45

I left both my singleton and my twins alone for short periods. We had baby gates and there weren't many climbing opportunities. Although I did make the mistake of leaving a bag of sugar on the table once. Twin 1 climbed up and emptied it all over twin 2 sat on the floor 😐That was a learning curve!
They all survived 😊

Lollipop81 · 01/10/2025 18:34

I had a travel cot in the living room which I used until they could climb out. Then a baby proofed room. Obviously never for long periods.

autumneves · 01/10/2025 18:16

MN love playpens but I don’t know anyone with one! IME they just whinge to get out of them.

autumneves · 01/10/2025 18:15

Yes, with both, half the time they followed me anyway.

There isn’t anything dangerous there.

Whyamiherenow · 01/10/2025 18:12

I left ds alone if I needed to do something. Or I asked him to look through a book in the room I was in so I could do things like shower / cook etc. I was never worried about leaving him alone in a room in the house when I was also in the house although he did get up to some mischief it was expedient.

andanotherproblem · 30/09/2025 23:11

QuickPeachPoet · 30/09/2025 22:52

this.
I don't want to be surgically attached to my child all the time I am at home - going to the toilet, taking a shower, making a hot drink are all necessities. Make sure the kid is safe and crack on.

She isn’t surgically attached to me, I was giving examples. I don’t have a playpen as my lounge is so small, I do have a travel cot which I leave her in if I go for a shower or getting ready in the mornings, I do take her when I need a wee as it’s just quicker, she is very independent I just can’t leave her to wander

OP posts:
TheCurious0range · 30/09/2025 22:55

Chance would've been a fine thing, ds was like my shadow, we did have a playpen though but he wasn't a fan, then whenever he was in it the cat used to think it was a game and climb in too or try and get the toys from the outside, which wasn't ideal

pumpkinscake · 30/09/2025 22:54

I had a play pen for short things like going to the loo, making a cup of tea etc. Would never leave a1 year old unsupervised otherwise.

Eenameenadeeka · 30/09/2025 22:53

I think it depends on the child, one of mine probably could have but the others definitely not

QuickPeachPoet · 30/09/2025 22:52

IsItBeesThoughLooshkin · 30/09/2025 21:32

I had a playpen so I could but otherwise wouldn’t have.

this.
I don't want to be surgically attached to my child all the time I am at home - going to the toilet, taking a shower, making a hot drink are all necessities. Make sure the kid is safe and crack on.

PorridgeAndSyrup · 30/09/2025 22:50

Yes, but very briefly, like to have a quick wee or grab something from the other room (otherwise I'd be dealing with a tantrum every time I picked her up and took her away from her current activity). At 12m, we used a travel cot downstairs as a play pen. By 18 months she could climb out of it so we stopped using it, and if she was in a calmer mood, I might leave her in front of the telly to make dinner (kitchen right next to lounge so I could keep looking in every 2 mins). But at the end of the day, you know your child. Mine were both similar to yours, but I have since realised that some children aren't like that, and are much calmer, and some of the criticism/surprise/"advice" you will get from other people will be from people whose children weren't like that, and so they have no idea quite how much mischief your child is capable of getting herself into! So therefore I would just roll your eyes and carry on doing things your way.

TeenLifeMum · 30/09/2025 22:29

Dd1 was never out of my sight, which I now realise was nuts. 2nd pregnancy was twins and dd1 was 3. I basically turned our living room into a big play pen and baby proofed it.

ItIsReallyFine · 30/09/2025 22:29

I don't remember leaving DS alone at that age. However I think I must have done it occassionally, because one time when we were visiting my parents, my DS managed to get to the back of the 6 foot tall freezer and turn off the power switch on the wall socket. By the time we realised, the entire freezer had defrosted. It was completely full because my parents lived in a place where they could be easily snowed in. My Dad was very money conscious, having grown up with little money.

We were very very unpopular that day, I can tell you. My parents emptied the freezer completely, cooked all the food, and put it back in the freezer. We spent about 4 hours in a car park some way away.

We were there for three weeks with still a full week to go. I think my Dad was relieved when we went home tbh.

So I think yes sometimes 18 month olds get out of sight, but it's not necessarily a good idea.

CarpetKnees · 30/09/2025 22:27

They went in the playpen if there was no adult in the room.

FrauPaige · 30/09/2025 22:22

Nope - I had an observer with me in the loo and the shower which didn't inconvenience me at all.

GetToHeaven · 30/09/2025 22:17

Oaktreet · 30/09/2025 21:38

1st child probably not, 2nd child all the time, never for very long though

This is my answer. Luckily my youngest is much less accident prone!

dontcomeatme · 30/09/2025 22:17

I had a playpen but once mine was properly walking he hated the thing and either climbed out or just undid the zip. So yeah I left him to his own devices pretty much from about 1.5yo, maybe earlier. I had safety gates on all the doors and stairs so he was contained wherever I needed him contained. But I would make dinner, pop to loo, clean and do jobs etc while he played independently, which he's always been great at. He's 2.5yo now and plays independently in his room most of the time he loves it. I have a video monitor on him just in case x

MumOryLane · 30/09/2025 22:13

No never at that age but he's just turned 2 this month and i can now leave him in the lounge whilst i cook dinner, popping my head in every 5 mins or so. A lot changes really quickly at this age

Theboymolefoxandhorse · 30/09/2025 21:57

I leave my 16 month old daughter a lot - for short periods of time. Once she realises I’m gone she follows if she can. She is walking very confidently and she can climb on the sofas but that’s not an issue - we have a big cushioned play mat in case she falls over. No play pen as she’s happier walking around. I will probably need to be more careful when she’s tall enough to walk into the edges of the table or reach higher table tops but there’s nothing particularly dangerous I think would happen to her which is why I am happy to leave her. Obviously in your case @andanotherproblem it sounds like your dc has had many accidents so I’m not surprised that you want to prevent further of them and find it strange that your family don’t understand this.

NamelessNinja · 30/09/2025 21:53

Yes, our living room is as baby proof as it can be. I leave my 18 month old to pop upstairs briefly or for longer doing something in the kitchen opposite. There is a baby gate on the living room so I can look in and she can come to the gate if she wants me. If my older two are home (5&8) will normally bribe them to entertain/keep an eye on her.