Hen party - was this comment a bit shitty?

I had something similar happen to me (not recently, not me!) and I went with 'I don't use instagram' rather than potentially muddying the waters.
Then they replied 'found you, came up when I typed your name, I sent you a follow!' like bissh I lied for a reason! So then I had to say 'I have one for like recipes and work stuff but I don't really post on instagram etc and I don't really like my photos knocking about everywhere'

Which then opened a whole can of worms and resulted in the hen (her sister was maid of honour so didn't really know her) messaging me asking if I've asked to be excluded from all photos at the hen and surely her sis had misunderstood?!?
I was like no! I just didn't want my instagram being tagged all over with pics I can't preapprove I wasn't trying to be funny. I'm self employed so I don't use my instagram like that.

It was a whole thing. I wish I'd just told them outright from the start.

Yeah… the problem being she’s got to go on a hen do with a snarky bitch!

She’s a twat all it needed was I don’t have IG

Absolutely nothing wrong with that at all.
I'd say you are the one with the problem.

I think it was a snippy response to be honest .
oh I’m so busy and important to be on social media with my full time work and all my children 🙄type of response .
All she needed to say was “ I’m not on instagram “

All she had to say was ‘I don’t use Instagram’ - no need for he to be snotty and passive aggressive

‘Clapping back’ and ‘pushed over the edge’ fucking hell 😂
This very important lady has been through the wringer. No one else has ever been 33 or had a job or kids!

Seriously? It's 'to the point' to give your age and details of children and work status to a request about your Instagram address? Rather than just saying, 'I don't use Insta'?
Can you really not see anything snitty in her message?

My mind is boggled over and over by this thread.

Perfectly polite and to the point. I don’t see anything wrong with it.

and children!! Obviously she's the first person ever to have children and therefore couldn't possibly do anything else any more.

Well she has got a full time job 😂

lol well maybe she’s got a lot going on besides being chased for social media links.

The reply inferred she was of an age and social standing to be far too ' adult' to be faffing around with insta. Yes she was being shitty.

But not responding when someone asks you a polite question isn't rude or annoying?

It's weird to me that so many posters are criticising the organisers etiquette for chasing up (once!) but not hers for completing ignoring the original message.

Why is "what's your insta" any more invasive that any of the many other questions that have inevitably been asked on that chat. If rude!hen was so incredibly busy and important with her FULL TIME JOB she could have saved herself the effort and offence of being chased and typing out her whole life story in justification, by just typing three short words "don't have it " or "don't use insta" when first asked.

Do you think the organiser really cares either way about whether or why she does/doesn't use social media? She's trying to be nice by not leaving anyone out. 100% if she only tagged half the people in photos someone else would be upset at that.

Blimey, you’d think this was major trauma rather than a request for an Instagram name she doesn’t have.

She needs to chill out if she gets wound up that easy.

I wouldn't bother going now if I was her because everyone will think she's a knob.

I think the chasing up probably tipped her over the edge.

Yes, exactly.
I'd still like to know if some people on this thread genuinely message/speak to people like IRL the way they're saying here they find acceptable.

If she just said, 'I don't use Instagram' people would have understood.
Now what they understand is that she's chippy, rude and snarky.

It is possible to think something without saying it. A lot of adults, 33 or otherwise, would do well to remember that.

She’s said about being 33 with kids because organising to tag each other is something teenagers would do. And chasing someone up for their instagram link is a bit much.

I agree with her 🤣 but she could have just said I don't post on Instagram so leave me out of it

I hate people tagging me in stuff. Especially on nights out.

I have Instagram for my photos, not so people can upload shit photos (because most of the time they are). I untagged so many photos on Facebook over the years because they were shit and I don't want them on my profile, at one point I had work friends on my social media. It's also why I avoid photos now as I don't want them out there for the world and his wife to find.

If people don't understand that that's their problem. So I'm with this friend all the way.

She is trying to come across a bit holier than thou and could have just said she didn’t use Instagram. But your friend also shouldn’t have chased for a response.

Perfectly understandable each to their own - after all what happens on a hen doesn't always stay on a hen if there are too many photos floating about!