If your child is not Catholic

I also sent my child to Catholic school in Ireland, though am an atheist. I just totally ignored any religious bits and pretended they weren't happening. It was grand! If he mentioned God or anything he heard in school, I'd just say, some people do believe that, mum and dad don't.

I agree. I can't think of anything more likely to mess with you children's heads than sending them to a Catholic school and then later tellling them yiuu hate Catholicism.
If something traumatic has happened to you, concerning Catholicism, it's important you keep it to yourself. Parents don't generally inflict 'exactly how' they have been affected by trauma on their children.
After they have left the school, it might be appropriate to hint at something of what has hapened to you. But you need to get help first to deal with yur hatred.

Don't believe it.
If any school said such a thing, parents would be livid.

DS is Catholic but I’m not. He went to a Catholic primary school and I went to all the services that parents were invited to.

Happily lapsed Catholic, Ireland, have never in my life heard anyone call it Holy Mass. Might be different in UK.

I understand what you're saying. Realistically, there have been all sorts of horrible opinions. floating around in history. It's not just the Catholic church. Society as a whole has changed.
I dont believe RC schools in the UK are teaching anything like that.

My DD went to a catholic secondary school and everyone had to attend every Mass and assembly and religious festival etc it’s part of the school community

Not if you didn’t get in by claiming to be Catholic - anyone can go if the school isn’t over subscribed. And many children with EHCPs go to faith schools without claiming to be of that faith.

@Tiredallthetimeneedsleep You can choose to go or not, but I’m sure you’d be very welcome if you did. No one is likely to judge you either way.

They told me about it last year at the dinner table. How their friend who was out was having to listen to lessons about how homosexuality is a sin. The kid made jokes afterwards, but he shouldn’t have to put up with that.

No child should be hearing it either, but it is what the Catholic Church preaches.

I think if you're known not to be a Catholic, but choose to turn up at Holy Mass, that will do you nothing but good with the powers that be in the school. It's just the kind of thing they would appreciate. They will be very fed up of people sending their children to the school and then insulting it's ethos. But that doesn't sound like you, OP.
So. from that point of view, it's a good idea to go.
It's also good to support your child and learn more about the religion.
But obviously, if it gives you the horrors for some reason, then don't go. They won't be offended , but , realistically, they may well notice.

In all my days I've never seen anyone do this. Why would someone do this?

If you don't want to take Communion, then you stay sitting down?

Having taught in Catholic, C of E and non secular schools I can say that those who are not religious probably benefit rather than not. There is always a more caring feel. Non Catholics can choose to have a blessing in a mass if they so desire and most kids chose to. The majority of the kids really enjoyed the masses (probably as they missed lessons), they loved a good rendition of My Lighthouse!

Again, I’m not saying I had no choice for nothing. I literally had no other choice. And how exactly am I a bigot? I was a victim of abuse in a catholic school when I was a child. I live in Ireland with the legacy of abuse and the fact that most of the schools are still catholic run, like most people here.

My DS's go/went to a catholic high school (we are all atheists) and I went to no religious stuff and my DS's said there was a religious assembly very rarely and no other religious stuff at all! I was very surprised.

Not at all, unless it was a few decades ago.
Many DC have 2 mum's or 2 dad's, or a gay aunt, uncle, cousin, brother, sister.
I am Catholic, love is love.

We've a few family members in same sex relationships.

Speak to the school, they'll opt them out of lessons. Saves any confusion in the future.
Obviously teach them that we have to respect each others personal views etc.
Many DC in my DS class opt it, it's not a problem.
DS is aware some DC have other beliefs and others have none, but it is all good. 🩷

And what century was this in? It’s simply not true, is it?

It’s not the religion I have a problem.
Also, they’re only in the first year of school.

I’m in Ireland. Most schools are catholic. There are very few non religious schools and they all have waiting lists a mile long. I literally had no other option. How am I a hypocrite?

I went to a Catholic secondary school. I'm not Catholic and we didn't have to go to mass, only when at school. I however did feel singled out as a non catholic, just what every teenage girl wants to feel! This is going back almost 30 years ago though.

We did spend quite a lot of our history murdering each other and seizing each other's property, depending on who the king or queen was.

I grew up in a devoutly Catholic household in a Catholic society — educated throughout in Catholic schools. What I ‘learned’ was that a hierarchy of celibate men attempted to control women’s bodies, systematically protected their ranks from the criminal justice system when they abused their position, and failed to be, in any way, good. Forgive me for not signing my child up to that, and for teaching him that a secular morality of justice, kindness and care for others and the world is possible without hierarchy and without supernatural beliefs.

Was this in 1847 as no school would say that to a child?

My nieces and nephews came home being told gay people go to hell.

I'm Catholic and have always loved school masses. They aren't like normal masses but then again I also love normal mass.

Have you been invited to a class mass? That's a bit like an assembly and the children do readings and sing songs. Like assembly it would be nice if you could go so your child can feel supported. Don't beat yourself up if you can't make it due to work.

If the mass doesn't involve your child doing a prayer or reading then there's no real need to go except to take part in the school community or for curiosity.

Or is it an "invitation " to go on Sunday. In which case do what you want but that will be a standard Sunday mass.

Mumsnet hates faith school but my experience has been absolutely lovely and my dc's school life would have been sadly lacking without the faith element . Each to their own.