LACK OF POTTY TRAINING BEFORE STARTING SCHOOL.

Where is the parent's support? We used to have children's centres the Conservative government got rid of them now we have issues with potty training has no-one connected the dots?

Plus you now need two working parent's to survive its really hard to potty train a child over various settings i had to train ds3 over nursery (fine) being with grandad (fine) home (fine) and dad's house (not fine they shoved him in nappy to make it easier for themselves) it took MONTHS to crack properly because I was being undermined because he didn't understand due to sen we got through it but it was bloody hard work

Unless there is a medical reason it’s out of order. Teachers study, get a degree, work hard and then are expected to potty train.

take a week off work in the summer and just put time aside. I stayed at home for week. Lazy parents. And yes, If no medical reasons they should be asked to come into the school to change the nappies. I work full time and did it on my own with the kids.

So this ^ is exactly the sort of advice I was referring to in my post upthread, and why I think it's understandable why lots of parents wait for something that never comes, and then end up panicking with a child in nappies just before school.

By the way, do you know who paid T. Berry Brazelton, the paediatrician who first started promoting the idea that you need a child to be psychologically ready in some way for toilet training? Pampers.

The training window is 20-30 months ideally. I trained mine at around 26/27 months each. It gets it done before they get too stubborn.
Good luck with your training.

The ridiculousness of it all. The advise is in the developed world is wait till they are ready which is of course correct as we don't want to bribe them or destroy their mental health. Once they are ready, usually around age 3 and only when they are interested, for most it should be done in days, not in years.
It's rightly so no longer done at 1 because women aren't slaves available to be on hand ready to catch it for thr next three years. And we value mental health and people as individuals so no need to force a child before they are ready.
Some that don't read much or value child development do it by pushing the kid earlier and end up mopping up for the next 5 years.

The ridiculousness of it all. The advise is in the developed world is wait till they are ready which is of course correct as we don't want to bribe them or destroy their mental health. Once they are ready, usually around age 3 and only when they are interested, for most it should be done in days, not in years.
It's rightly so no longer done at 1 because women aren't slaves available to be on hand ready to catch it for thr next three years. And we value mental health and people as individuals so no need to force a child before they are ready.
Some that don't read much or value child development do it by pushing the kid earlier and end up mopping up for the next 5 years.

I just mean particular contexts or demographics rather than geography.

Its just I work in two infant schools and have regular interactions with other infant schools and none of us have the numbers of childrens being described here as in nappies due to lazy parents. Im talking about seeing 150 children a year personally and then the children at linked schools so im hearing about maybe 500 children each year.

I think its not happening to the extent the press are saying because I think the stats have been interpreted badly.
Are there some lazy parent not potty training. Yes. Is it a quarter or half of every class in the country. No.

Thank you for this. My LO is toilet trained but still has some accidents (there are additional needs at play). Luckily he has a 1:1 TA who is amazing but I'm so worried about him being teased.

I think there are likely lots of reasons for delayed toilet training. Better nappies being one (nursery advised us to put something in my son's nappy to help him associate weeing in a nappy with feeling wet after our 100th failed potty training attempt-it did seem to help. Children are less inclined to care about potty training in modern nappies that are fantastic at keeping them dry and comfortable).

Less time is also a factor. I was lucky to be able to spend days at a time working with my son. That was only possible because I'm at home a lot with him anyway. If both parents work full time then a lot of potty training success is going to come down to the child themselves or how supportive childcare is (absolutely fine if you have a child that only needs you to take one week of annual leave to get them dry, or is able to do it in a weekend. Not great for reluctant children who need more time and/or go to providers that don't offer much support in potty training).

Not all SEN is diagnosed by school age. Some of the children starring school without being potty trained likely have undiagnosed needs. Many are absolutely able to attend a mainstream school, they may just need additional help and support to do so.

Lack of support is probably also an issue. The people who used to be able to access things like sure start still need support. There just doesn't seem to be much support available now.

I don't think pure laziness is the issue much of the time (surely you'd want your child out of nappies as quickly as possible if you're lazy? Life is much easier once they can take themselves to the toilet!).

Lack of potty training is not area specific…..😆🤦🏼‍♀️ Just because YOU haven’t seen it (how would you see it unless you know every parent of a toddler in your area?!) doesn’t mean it’s not happening!

You can do it!!

You'll need the will of steel, my experience was thus:

Day 1 - few accidents. Obviously to be expected, excited about the wins etc
Day 2 & 3 - feel like going backwards. A lot more accidents, feel so bored and trapped at home. Tired of constantly having to supervise. Feeling so anxious that no progress seems to be happening. The days feel like never ending.
Days 4 onwards - almost miraculous change. Progress made at last. Thanking the gods we didn't just bail at the end of disastrous day 3.

This was for both of my sons.

We used nappies at night until the nappies were dry in the mornings for a week.

Are you a Reception teacher? Because I have been, and every year there are NT children still in pull-ups who have to be toilet trained at school. This involves teaching the parent what we are going to do and say, giving them a script so that the child learns that big boys poo on the loo etc.

Yep! I won't give up. Got a week before carpet gets deep cleaned.

I don't think parents should be fined either. My point was that the mother of this child had not tried at all because of his CP but there was no actual reason why not. That wouldn't be the case for every child with CP obviously.

I had three children in my last Reception class before retirement who were in nappies and I only had a part-time TA. They may have turned out to have had SEN but the parents hadn't even started a process of diagnosis. They were eventually allocated TA support.

No need to be naked, t shirts/jumpers are fine

@autienotnaughty the part about nappies is exactly what my mother used to say about potty training being later and later in recent years. She said when people had to soak cloth nappies, boil them, dry them etc etc they potty trained much, much earlier. Also in other countries where disposable nappies are not in common use, children are also trained earlier. Disposable nappies just make it so much easier for parents not to have all the faff and bother of cloth ones.
Also, each disposable nappy takes around 500 years to decompose in landfill.

Life is easier once they are trained but the first few days of training are hard work, completely boring and draining. People give up.
Just like quitting smoking.

That is some crap advice, but a large part of parenting is common sense and forward thinking.
What happens if they never show signs of being ready? Nappies are such a big expense, you'd want to get rid of them ASAP.

Thank you. Will defo keep him naked