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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be considering a tonsillectomy for my 5 year old?

29 replies

Bearhead1867 · 28/09/2025 22:05

Backstory-
my son has a very rare laryngeal cleft so has been under ENT from birth, he has a severe speech disorder and suffered with repeated tonsillitis for years to the point his consultant was going to take his tonsils out, then it suddenly stopped so we decided on a watch and wait approach.

Fast forward to now, apart from his speech the cleft hasn’t caused any issues and we were discharged from ENT, his consultant was absolutely amazing.

due to his repeated tonsils his tonsils are huge and full of crypts, they get full of tonsil stones and his breath absolutely stinks 😭 so on top of his speech disorder when he does actually talk the smell is unbelievable, he can smell it too and it’s breaking my heart.

Last week I was at an appointment for myself at a private hospital and out walked his consultant, she immediately came over asking how my son was and I told her, she said I should ask my gp to refer him back to her or I can see her privately to discuss options. Thing is my gp can’t refer me back to her because she’s at a main children’s hospital and they can only refer local. Due to his cleft I would only want her because she’s an expert in the particular location of his cleft. I would absolutely take him privately for this.

am I mad for even considering the tonsillectomy? His confidence is already in the ground anyway with his speech and now the breath issue on top is too much for him. It’s not his teeth etc it’s absolutely the tonsil stones…

not sure what to do! Help

OP posts:
Tillylantern · 28/09/2025 22:18

I would definitely get them taken out. All 3 of mine had their's taken out at that age. They recovered so quickly. They were sitting up in bed eating that evening. I've watched a few teenagers and adults in my extended family get theirs taken out and the recovery was horrendous . Given his issues I would definitely get it done. Good luck whatever you decide.

bonnemaman1990 · 28/09/2025 22:17

Your GP absolutely can refer you to a tertiary centre- particularly if you are known to a consultant there. Don’t take no for an answer. They just need to send the letter there. I doubt an ENT surgeon at a local centre would be keen to take your child on if he was previously under the care of the tertiary centre where all his notes will be.

I’m a Tertiary centre doctor. I
wish him all the best with his treatment

whymewhyme · 28/09/2025 22:17

Get it done, if to can afford it you will not regret it.

My DS has just had his tonsils and adenoids out due to reoccurring tonsillitis honestly it has changed his life.

He sleeps better,speaks more clearly and no more debilitating tonsillitis.

I will warn you though, the op recovery is quite tough.

Pleasegodgotosleep · 28/09/2025 22:12

Get it done! Its so unffaur to leave him like that.

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