Keir Starmer "sick and tired" of hearing about children who aren't school-ready

I also blame the ‘gentle parenting’ style of ‘they’ll do it when they’re ready’ and long complex chats rather than short basic instructions. So many toddlers being essentially grey rocked and baffled with no clear rules and boundaries. They muddle around every day with these useless mixed signals and parents who think they understand symbolic things like ‘worry monsters’

I know. It’s so sad and infuriating at the same time.

I think that statement has been taken entirely out of context. Schools report a significant decline in pupils social and personal skills when children are entering nursery/reception. The cohorts after COVID developed very few social skills, but they also came with a decline in other areas (not toilet trained, not able to put on simple clothing, not able to hold a pen). Simply, skills that parents should be teaching their own children and that are not a schools job. Using school time to teach basic skills means a loss of teaching and impacts other children.
These assessments do not apply to children with SEN, disabilities or who have medical issues. So, in the case of your own child you don't need to worry. But, in some ways, you should be supporting his statement because he is highlighting that your child will have less teacher interaction and support because of it.

I am confident the child will adjust well in life and at school.

In many schools, there aren't enough support staff/TAs to deal with it.

Yeah, children with SEN need more. I dont think dealing.with the reasons neurotypical children aren't ready to start school (while important) will also necessarily help parents of children with SEN. They need specialist support or at least extra informed support.

Some children are developmentally delayed but I get his point. There are a lot of parents who don't teach basic skills to their preschoolers. They can't be bothered or act like their friends. We have become a society who make excuses, won't accept responsibility and have low standards and expectations.

They have started bringing back sure start. It's rebranded to Family Hubs.

Our town has had one put in the town centre with a little creche/play area.

They weren't actually able to help me with much for my SEN child though who is still not toilet trained.

In fairness, if you read the full transcript it does look as if his point is that the support isn't in place. So he isn't so much having a good old Mumsnet rant at rubbish parents but talking about the removal of support structures. Which is what he, as prime minister, should be focussing on. The thing is, if all he does is talk about the problem without putting money where his mouth is then it's still just gesture politics so we shall see. I agree.it would be fantastic if they brough back sure start.

25% of children turn up to school and they’re not potty trained. The vast majority of them just have lazy parents.

My mother has been in childcare 35 years and said the last 10 years it's got progressively worse and that it's really really bad now - not all (there are lots of well loved and cared for children) but for many, parenting has completely gone out the window

Playgroups can't do it all! They've got a lot of children and not a lot of time to be teaching them basics which parents should be doing at home. What's the point of spending time potty training 20 children then half of them go home and get put back in nappies...for example

It’s really sad isn’t it because I just feel so attacked when people talk about children not being school ready. We have tried so much with our daughter who has global developmental delay, & now suspected autism. I have tried and tried and tried for 2 years to potty train her it has been a living hell to literally sit and watch a child just not get it. You just wouldn’t know unless you lived it. I thought the same way as everybody else did until this happened to me & now my daughter is one of the kids at school who needs her nappy changed and it makes me cry everyday. She went to nursery & pre school 2 days a week where she was completely unsupported it has now come to light, they were not truthful with us at all & now she needs more funding etc. it’s a shame ! 😔

Techers are there to teach, not wipe kids bottoms when parents can't be bothered to potty train them. Don't care what Starmer says because he is an enemy .

Given the huge variation in what nurseries offer and the closure of Sure Start provision, I think he lacks awareness of how tough it can be when you've no money, no support and you're trying to get through each day as it comes.

I'm not defending poor parenting but I am saying that many are on their knees.

I wouldn't have believed it until I saw it first-hand: whole communities have suffered enormously from the combination mentioned above.

I'd be relaunching Sure Start at this point and look hard at how funding cuts to libraries has had a terrible effect on parent engagement and early literacy development.

So are they school unready having missed out playgroup or nursery?

And you would find it acceptable to be sat next to someone at a formal dinner eating with their hands ?

Many people in this country eat with their fingers
Statistics please?

My GD dad has her when he isn’t working and is working towards having her full time but unfortunately wasn’t in a Safe place to have her when she was left with me, and I believe that the other two are with their father now full time but I only know what social workers could tell me.

@Mischance No they don’t. Many are perfectly ok and respond well to the EY curriculum. Plenty are ready for school and we’ve never had a kindergarten system. No one thought dc should not go to school at 4/5 years ago when hardly any dc went to nursery. In fact summer born dc were prevented from having the full 2 years of EY by starting after Easter just before they turned 5. They didn’t get much in YR by starting so late. A good EY curriculum will get dc off to a flying start but parents have a crucial role too. My dd and plenty of others are more than capable of thriving in our system.

Well that's just daft. UK children go to school far too young anyway ...

And your point is?
While there is a lot about our culture that I would expect people who come here from other countries to adopt as a matter of course, eating with a knife and fork isn't one of them.

And here we are in a western country.

@canyouseemyhousefromhere The big issue was the parents who needed the help most not attending. Chaotic people just don’t. People at work didn’t go. Often they could not afford the bus fare if coming in from a village - or no buses at all. It helped some people but we had family centres but many mums never followed any advice at all. Some parents are very difficult to help. We need pin point targeting of resources but no one likes ti say “it’s you - you are the crappy parent”.

Once a week my son is allowed to watch things on my phone while we eat (it's a long story). I noticed his table manners go completely out of the window when he does. It's the same for adults and even me too. Something about it means I'm staring at the phone and using my fingers to put food in my mouth. Thats completely different to say a South Asian family who sit round a table together and talk while eating in a mindful way but with their fingers. Or a Chinese family using chopsticks. In that case their children are still learning table manners from adults. Its just the table manners are different. Its hard because what might be a symptom of a wider problem in one family is a result of different customs in another. But a small child who learnt to eat with fingers or chopsticks with the rest of their family has already learnt the importance of sitting and eating with others and the concept of table manners. So I don't think it's as hard for them to learn different table manners. It's different to a child where just hasn't been taught.

And I think the second thing happens for all sorts of reasons - stressed parents, parents not realising their children can do more etc. it's not always the parents are stupid and lazy.

So it's hard to differentiate but there is a difference