To say it’s “because my parents were professionals”?

Did you go to private school OP? That’s probably the explanation surely?

My husband was born in Croydon, lived there for 2 years, moved to Farnborough, Hampshire until he was 7 and then moved to Dorset. His parents were both from London, and had the accent. My husband has no accent!! Neither of his parents were professionals, very much working class. I was born in Wiltshire, grew up in Hampshire and now live in Dorset, but I have a slight Hampshire/Dorset accent! 🤷 My son born in Dorset, growing up in Dorset but he has no Dorset accent!! 🤷

I grew up in a bog standard commuter town and went to private school. I have a posh accent without a posh lifestyle. My DF is from the North so when I go there I play the I'm a soft Southerner card.

I actually find it harder in London as I sound privileged. I would say I probably care less as I get older.

I also sometimes get asked if I'm Australian and genuinely I reply no but I watched a lot of Neighbours growing up as I genuinely think that's where I get it from!

"we were a Radio 4 family" was my go-to line

It's called sympathetic accent syndrome.

I know several (more than 10) born and bred and *unrelated Welsh people, moved to England for university or work (after university in Wales) and none have Welsh accents. FWIW they are all professionals.

*one couple are both Welsh but obviously grew up in different families.

I don't think that's true.

I work with a woman from the North East from a professional family. Father is a barrister. Sister was a QC.

She just sounds "posh". There are a few tiny cues that she's not from the south east, but you have to listen out for them.

Usually there is a "posher" version of a local accent - outsiders may not be able to pick up on it. But locals will get it.

Best to say 'my parents didn't have an accent'.

I went to private school so didn't have much of an accent to start with but when I went to drama school I had special.after school lessons to knock what accent I had out of me.

From observation most kids get their accent from school or choice.

I recently attended a wedding in Yorkshire. The brides family were from Yorkshire but none had a regional accent. All very wealthy. Kids went to boarding school - but in Yorkshire.

I assume the lacing regional accent is y generation after generation were educated outside the public school system and they didn’t spend a lot of time with folks who had a regional accent - despite living in the area.

I got a problem with accents. Maybe it's because I'm not British but I keep picking up accents when I hear them. I just listened to a Val Mcdermid audiobook and I started speaking Scottish to a friend. If I go somewhere I wind up speaking like the locals after a week. Surely this must be a syndrom of some sorts. I admire people who keep their accents wherever they go, don't know hiw they do that.

Ah maybe I just don't know any genuinely posh people 😂 I was thinking more along of the lines of nurses, teachers and solicitors. I know quite a few and they have local accents

I don’t think so. My niece and nephew have been born and brought up in Newcastle and whilst they’re clearly not southern they have very soft accents. I would say it’s because they’re from a fairly affluent part of the city. Same as my SIL who is from Manchester, she has a very slight accent in that she says ba-th not Barth and gras not grahs but she is very much from there but was privately educated and is the child of immigrants who still have strong foreign acccents

Everyone might have “an accent” but that doesn’t mean you can attribute it to a region. Many people think my husband is from Inverness. He has never been there in his life, but like me, his mother was keen to rise out of her very working class roots and adopted quite a fake posh accent. The most you could pin him down as is “Scottish”, which is about the same as saying someone has an “English” accent or an American one, which means very little.

I moved from one country in the U.K. to another aged 5 and discovered children would hit you if you spoke funny, I picked up the local accent quite quickly. Only to discover my mother was one of those people who thought the local accent just shouldn’t ever be spoken, let alone using the local dialect. It was battered out of us quite young. As a result, I have a very non descript accent where all words are pronounced “properly”. That said, havjng a “posh” grandma and a non posh one, I became quite adept at changing my accent to suit who I was speaking to. My husband jokes that the closer I get to “home” the more my accent slips into how I spoke when I was 5. I find it useful on a professional level because no matter who I speak to whether it is the CEO of a company, or the bloke cleaning the windows, they think I am one of them and tend to warm quickly. I am accused in my house of being posh because of the glass/glass divide. 😆

Exaggerating your accent isn't the same as changing it. We once sat at the next table to a well known Yorkshire cricketer who was often on TV where he displayed a broad Yorkshire, ee bah gum, accent. In real life he had a fairly mild Yorkshire accent which he was loud enough for us all to hear him unfortunately.

Everyone has an accent, even the very posh ones.

I spoke very differently from my friends as my dad was very Victorian and wanted us to speak the way he thought was "proper" for a lady (hahahahaha). This lasted until I went to senior school, got bullied for being a "snob" and up myself and quickly adapted 😂 I still speak differently to my husband (who grew up in the same area) but not as noticeably so. I just tell anyone who picks up on it (not many) about my lovely dad's pipe dreams 😂

Well yes yabu because neither being a professional nor being the child of a professional precludes you from having your local accent.

Yes as I said you can choose to change your accent.

YANBU, it was a stupid question to begin with and even more stupid to labour the point. There are loads of reasons why someone wouldn’t have a “regional” accent.

There is a lot of evidence that education, particularly going away to university, modifies how people speak. I think what you encountered is a kind of reverse snobbery.

Being nicely spoken is a life skill, like being able to write well and clearly. At some point it makes a difference in life.

My mother was from Derby and had no accent. My father was from Luton. His parents had the Luton accent. He hated it and got rid of it. I went to school in Herefordshire from the age of 5. I was never, ever allowed to speak with the local accent. I sound like I went to private school. My children grew up in Herefordshire. Neither has the local accent. My best friend's family are brummies. She went to work in a bank at 17 and it was very much not the thing to have a broad accent so she got rid of it . I was really surprised when I met her family for the first time that they didn't sound at all like her. Accents are entirely a choice. If it doesn't serve you in your working life then it needs to go.

My grandparents are from Jamaica and when they came here and had their children they made sure the children spoke the queens English with no Jamaican accent despite most of the community having the accent so I’d say parental input of ‘speak properly’ has some play - but also so do peers, me and my brother were both brought up the same way and I say ‘baRth’ and he says ‘baFF’

There's a sense in which people choose. Some people ham up their accents - A J Odudu, Tess Daly, Lisa Nandy. Some underplay them