Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do I eat Dylan?

112 replies

MonsterX · 25/09/2025 20:33

Meet Dylan. He is an iced Dylan Dinosaur from Waitrose no less. Hand selected by my child(5) 3 days ago. Dylan lovingly sits on our worktop taunting me and my low carb diet. DS does not want Dylan. DS now prefers hot cross buns and keeps pushing Dylan away.

I've had a really shitty day where DP and I have fallen out and we're currently doing that awkward polite talking I hate. I've just made myself a hot chocolate to take to bed ... Would I be unreasonable to take Dylan with me and eat his head? I'd leave his body. I'm on a diet after all 🤭

Do I eat Dylan?
OP posts:
Original poster
MonsterX · 25/09/2025 20:50

@TheChosenTwo see this is sensible advice. But it's late and I don't want to go out and misery always enjoys company... The company of Dylan.

OP posts:
Fairy25 · 25/09/2025 20:48

do it now, leave no trace

TheChosenTwo · 25/09/2025 20:48

I’m generally low carb and no sugar but every now and then I will fancy something sweet - when I do I will buy what I really want at that time.
I think Dylan looks like he’d be an awfully disappointing ‘treat’ but that water sort of icing is my worst kind and I’m not mad on biscuits so probably not what I’d go for. if you want something a bit treaty make it fucking excellent and enjoy every bite!

Original poster
MonsterX · 25/09/2025 20:48

@MousseMousse no it's not a weigh in to get over the threshold or anything. It's a health check point. It does weight and height, blood pressure etc. It's so you can feel bad about yourself at work as well as at home.

OP posts:
Homegrownberries · 25/09/2025 20:47

Thinking logically about it - dinosaurs being extinct would make the calories also extinct. It's a guild free treat.

BeaLola · 25/09/2025 20:46

It's a well known fact that iced biscuits meant for children are calorie free ...

MousseMousse · 25/09/2025 20:46

MonsterX · 25/09/2025 20:42

@meganorks this is an issue. I have weigh in at work first thing. We have one of those self righteous machines that weighs and measures you and tells you your head will explode from stress.

Dylan isn't going to cause you to gain several pounds.

But...they weigh you at work?!

Titasaducksarse · 25/09/2025 20:46

As long as you give out a T Rex style roar before tucking in then all is OK!

Original poster
MonsterX · 25/09/2025 20:46

@Silverbirchleaf I like this logic. I wouldn't want my child disappointed that dinosaurs don't actually exist and this delicious biscuit will be confusing him.

OP posts:
Homegrownberries · 25/09/2025 20:45

Dinosaur meat is a really good source of protein.

Silverbirchleaf · 25/09/2025 20:44

You do know dinosaurs died out centuries ago, so shouldn’t exist in today’s society, so you’ll be doing the world a favour by devouring him.

StasisMom · 25/09/2025 20:43

Eat him all and don’t feel bad. You can get back on it tomorrow.

Original poster
MonsterX · 25/09/2025 20:42

@meganorks this is an issue. I have weigh in at work first thing. We have one of those self righteous machines that weighs and measures you and tells you your head will explode from stress.

OP posts:
Lonelycrab · 25/09/2025 20:42

Definitely eat his head

maybe have a nibble on his tail too

Womanofcustard · 25/09/2025 20:42

Do the Full Dylan, the new Full Colin !

meganorks · 25/09/2025 20:42

Also, if it was my child, they will want it precisely after it's been eaten....

ainsleysanob · 25/09/2025 20:42

Dylan looks like he’s got it coming with his silly little t-Rex arms. Gobble him up, if not for yourself then do it for the poor herbivore dinos from yesteryear.

UnmarketableTomato · 25/09/2025 20:42

EchoedSilence · 25/09/2025 20:37

You do know if you eat Dylan your child will be wailing for him tomorrow.

You snooze, you lose.

The real question, head first or tail first?

Arlanymor · 25/09/2025 20:41

Look at Dylan’s face (I am pronouncing it ‘Dullan’ in the Welsh way, I hope that’s acceptable) he WANTS you to be happy. Don’t deprive him of his mission in life.

meganorks · 25/09/2025 20:41

YABU. But only because he is going to be really disappointing. And then you'll feel doubly shitty for cheating on you diet and wasting it on Dylan

guestofclanmackenzie · 25/09/2025 20:40

Do it

Original poster
MonsterX · 25/09/2025 20:40

@EchoedSilence that's why he has lasted so long. I made sure DS doesn't want Dylan. He has forcefully pushed him away today and 100% just wants hot cross buns. I reckon he has forgotten about Dylan.

OP posts:
WinWhenTheyreSinging · 25/09/2025 20:39

EchoedSilence · 25/09/2025 20:37

You do know if you eat Dylan your child will be wailing for him tomorrow.

That’s why it’s better that she eats him all, so his remains don’t remind the child of his existence.

Allelbowsandtoes · 25/09/2025 20:39

EchoedSilence · 25/09/2025 20:37

You do know if you eat Dylan your child will be wailing for him tomorrow.

Too slow, DS, too slow

MummytoE · 25/09/2025 20:39

MonsterX · 25/09/2025 20:38

I've not yet tried him. But I believe he is gingerbread with yellow colour icing which probably tastes like pure sugar .... Delicious sugar

Oh wait, it's not dinosaur meat??

Swipe left for the next trending thread