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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To say school went too far suspending him for a vape

334 replies

Abdican · 25/09/2025 12:17

basically DS14 has been suspended for 3 days cos he was caught with a vape at school and I just feel like that’s too harsh for a first time he only had it in his blazer pocket he wasn’t even using it in class or anything it was at break time.

I know vaping isn’t good before anyone says it but loads of kids are doing it and I’d already told him off and taken it off him when I found it before so it feels like he’s getting punished twice. He’s gonna miss lessons and he’s already behind.

I rang the school and they were really rude to me saying they have a zero tolerance policy and if it happens again he could be permanently excluded. I get rules are rules but I don’t think chucking him out for 3 days is going to teach him anything except to sit at home on his Xbox.

sorry long post but I feel like they’re making an example of him cos he’s a bit cheeky in class sometimes. do schools really suspend for this straight away? or am I right to think they’ve gone too far?

OP posts:
ColinOfficeTrolley · 25/09/2025 12:21

This has got to be ragebait

FuzzyWolf · 25/09/2025 12:21

Surely you are the one choosing to punish him twice since school have already done so.

If he’s a bit cheeky in class then they probably do have a lower tolerance as it’s not the first time he’s been in trouble, even if for different things.

Ultimately he needs to follow the school policy and you would do better supporting the school than minimising his behaviour.

Slothey · 25/09/2025 12:21

Good. Terrible behaviour that the kids who want to learn and stay healthy shouldn’t have to be around.

Tunacheesequesadilla · 25/09/2025 12:21

Sounds very fair to me.

TallulahBetty · 25/09/2025 12:20

Not far enough, IMO.

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 25/09/2025 12:20

Maybe check what else they have a zero tolerance policy on so you're not shocked about the school enforcing rules.

Also he doesn't need to spend three days on an Xbox.

StarlightRobot · 25/09/2025 12:19

I think it’s a good lesson for you son to follow the rules at school and put up with the consequences. Is it ilegal to vape at age 14? If so, he was also breaking the law. Schools should be strict about these types of things.

Pixiedust49 · 25/09/2025 12:19

If it’s the school policy then you have to suck it up. And he shouldn’t really be allowed on his Xbox if he’s been suspended from school.

murasaki · 25/09/2025 12:19

I doubt it's the first time. While he's suspended, take the x box away and make him do some of the catching up he needs to do since you say he's behind.

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