Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

That I could do this commute twice a week?

86 replies

gooseberryfooled · 25/09/2025 07:32

I've been WFH since 2020 but my employer has just mandated two days in the office for everyone in my department. There will be some flexibility but mostly I will be commuting twice a week, most weeks.

I am quite happy with this, I've been considering going in more for a while now and my current commute is a fairly easy 45 mins door to door (train and a bit of walking).

However, we (me, DH and DC8) have been planning to move house mid-next year. It's long planned and much wanted - we've found the exact village we want to move to and are very set on living by water and out in the country. But the move would out my commute at an hour and 20 minute train journey, plus around 15-20 minutes getting to and from train stations at either end (that might be reduced depending on how close to the village station we end up living). It would also be more expensive but manageable.

Am I being horribly unrealistic to think that's doable? There would be some weeks I could negotiate going only once to another office where more of my team sit so it might be 3 weeks out of 4. DH is a SAHP so no issues with childcare.

OP posts:
Bambamhoohoo · 25/09/2025 07:43

Do you know what, I’d just do it. Who knows what’s ahead of you in life? You might just get another job or do something else. You might decide the location is more important than the job if push comes to shove. May as well try though

Handmethegunandaskmeagain · 25/09/2025 07:41

I used to do a 2 hour door to door commute 5 days a week. It’s really tiring but doable.

I’d say what you are looking at is very workable, but if possible try to stagger the days, so don’t do Monday and Tuesday. Do Monday and maybe Wednesday. I found by Friday I was shattered, so get the journeys out of the way earlier in the week.

Having your DP as a sahp is a massive plus here, as on those days where you do the long commute he can presumably sort dinner (I say presumably as I don’t know your setup with who cooks and how often etc).

TheNightingalesStarling · 25/09/2025 07:41

How reliable is the train?
Have you considered a cheap hotel for the one night instead?

Thunderdcc · 25/09/2025 07:40

If it turned out to be a nightmare would you consider staying one night overnight? Then you'd only have to go and come back once.

You should probably be prepared for it creeping up to 3 days, then 4 but that will not happen overnight it will take a few years!

whimsicallyprickly · 25/09/2025 07:38

The thing is....2 days a week, ok, I guess. But many companies are choosing to gradually insist on 5 days a week.

Can you get the 2 days written into your contract?

How much is the travelling £ wise? Is it worth it?

mynameiscalypso · 25/09/2025 07:38

Pre-Covid, that was a very common commute for a lot of people that I work with. I’ve certainly done it before for particular jobs. It wouldn’t worry me particularly.

MuffinsAreJustCakesAtBreakfast · 25/09/2025 07:37

Similar commute to me although I do it only once a week. I try to travel off peak which makes a difference money wise too.

It depends what is waiting for you at the office, nice team, seeing people you actually work with etc, laughing...then it might be worth it.

my train journey is 1hr 10mins and I use the time productively. I also don't eat dinner on those days (higher lunch) or I eat a snack box I made at home on the train for dinner. Means when I roll in the door at 7.30pm I can get on with things.

ishimbob · 25/09/2025 07:37

I think with one child and a SAHP, this should be absolutely fine but I would want to be walking distance from the station for sure, not driving there.

Motnight · 25/09/2025 07:37

If you don't have to worry about childcare it is definitely doable.

As @Cheerfulcharlie says, how definite is it that WFH won't decrease?

tilypu · 25/09/2025 07:36

Cheerfulcharlie · 25/09/2025 07:34

Is it definitely going to only be 2 days a week in the future or do you think they will increase it in a year or two?

This would be my main concern. Twice a week, absolutely doable. But is there a chance they might make it more?

Cheerfulcharlie · 25/09/2025 07:34

Is it definitely going to only be 2 days a week in the future or do you think they will increase it in a year or two?

Swipe left for the next trending thread