Dentist said he'd report me

When I saw the title of the thread I was expecting to read that a dentist was threatening to report the parent for neglecting the dental health of a child by not seeking adequate treatment. Instead it’s the complete opposite. Mum is trying to prevent further harm both emotional and physical. And the dentist’s behaviour is likely to seriously impact the child possibly for years.
I really feel for you op and I hope you can manage to get the treatment for your son.
good luck

Your son has capacity to make the decision about the braces and so it is his to make, BUT it is part of the dentist's duty of care that he must receive any additional support he needs to reach it. You have correctly identified the communication issue whereas the dentist has simply ignored it: the dentist asked a silly question and got a literal answer. The question needs to be "do you give your consent to this treatment?" The result is that important treatment has been withheld because of the dentist's failure to communicate with his patient.

There are guidelines in the codes of practice addressing both communication standards and meeting the needs of patients with autism, and they haven't been considered at all.

Make a formal complaint explaining this and request a rescheduled appointment.

Yes, do get your coat.
You know exactly what the OP meant.
Do you feel better now?

But patients have to have the capacity to consent. Gillick competency is quite complex

I disagree. Dentists should explain the advantages of having braces - ours certainly did. My DS said he didn’t want them. Dentist explained what dental problems are likely to arise requiring work in future years if he doesn’t have braces. He strongly advised him to have them. DS then said OK.

This is interesting to me as last year when my son was 7, we were at his dentist and the dentist said to him ‘And what do you like to drink the most?’ So my son said ‘coke’, the dentist was about to write this down that he mainly drinks coke when i said ‘No, you asked him what he likes to drink. DS, what is your main drink every day?’ And he said ‘water.’ He literally drinks only water not even squash but maybe once every few months will have a swig of my coke, which he likes. I was a bit concerned that they took the word of a 7 year old as gospel in response to a clumsily worded question.

This happened to several of my friends - all interestingly mothers of boys and NT boys - girls seem to have no problem consenting. I had a word with my son before his first appointment and basically told him that he must consent as to get braces on the NHS is a privilege as some authorities don't offer orthodontic treatment on the NHS.

I used to work in a dentist and unfortunately if the child doesn't consent the orthodontist cannot create a treatment plan - it is that black and white - but how many 14 yr old teenage boys really know what is best for them.

No, that's how the OP related the conversation to us. It was definitely the dentist who did the interrupting and said "you can't force him...."

(I'm not sure which way you understood it though, because as you say, you forgot to quote who you were responding to.)

OP clarified this on page 6 at around 8:30. It was the dentist who said this but it was ambiguously put. You're not the first person to have read it in a way that's negative to the OP.

I haven’t mentioned Gillick and he hasn’t been able to give or withhold consent because he hasn’t had reasonable adjustments to allow him to do so.

Incidentally it is so wrong to hand important decisions over to children without talking to them properly and making sure they have the information required to make their choice in their own best interests.

I remember I was asked, age 14 if I wanted braces. I said no. I made that choice based on zero information. It wasn’t explained to me that my teeth would continue to shift in adulthood as my wisdom teeth came in.

My teeth were very mildly crooked as a teen, but by age 27 they were a total mess, and I haven’t got £10k to sort them out. I could have has the op for free as a teen, if only I’d been given the time and information to make a proper decision.

I feel very aggrieved and let down by the dentist for not explaining to me the pros and cons and why it might have been a good idea.

The Gillick criteria for being able to give consent don’t come into it, as it is not a lifesaving procedure.

No dentist could or should force a patient who doesn’t want braces to have them. He very much can withhold consent.

Actually, this is a really good point. DD had her appendix out earlier this year, she was asked for her consent to the operation, not if she ‘would like’ the operation.

I agree with you OP. He lacks capacity and cannot consent or withhold consent but most importantly the dentist did not fully explain things or allow time for your son to understand what he was saying. You could argue that if he was refusing treatment it would be hard to force it upon him but again with support it would be feasible. There’s an excellent educational module I’ve just completed put together by the family of Oliver McGowan . He was a young adult with an LD who died due to medics not listening and taking into account his wishes and medical information. you could make an official complaint and mention all of the above but state that if your son can be reviewed under better conditions you will not progress a complaint. If they won’t budge there is a series of steps you can take to progress your complaint further . I think it would go to NHS England next. Mention as you go the failure to make reasonable adjustments and the threats to report you. Hope this gets sorted

I really feel for you. My son has diagnosed autism and adhd and is also quite literal. If a dentist had asked him if he was happy to have braces he would likely also have said" im not happy,no." A more appropriate question from the dentist would have been " do you agree to have braces on your teeth ?"
You should complain and state that these subtle differences can be vital and ask to see a dentist again. Its outrageous he should have to wait all over again due to a misunderstanding. Good luck.

Coercive control.. for wanting her son to have nice teeth? I'm not sure this will go anywhere to be honest.

We waited 3 years to get to the orthodontist. I nearly fell off my chair when she then asked my daughter if she wanted braces. I mean nobody wants to go through the hassle but the result is worth it. Why do they even ask if you've turned up after a massive long wait?

My kids have had multiple operations with general anaesthetic and they have never asked them if they would like the operation.. no one wants an operation.

Yes, exactly. A child-friendly question would have been “do you agree to have the braces?”

Definitely follow up. You have a strong case. Your dentist did not take account of your son’s additional needs when seeking consent and treatment is now being withheld on the basis of miscommunication.

If you drop the phrase ‘indirect discrimination’ into your phone call / e-mail of complaint, they may take you more seriously.

Yep - when the nurse asks me if I’m ‘happy’ for her to continue with my smear test, the answer is obviously a resounding ‘not really’. Would I like her to get it over and done with, that’s a ‘yes please’.

The report would be in relation to coercive control, not dental health.

What we like and what we need are two different things! Like you say does anyone really want/like braces? No. But what we do desire is the result of them so on that basis we agree to the treatment.
You were polite to have even thanked him, threatening to report you for taking a concern in your son's dental care is ludicrous.

Such a twattish comment. You know what she meant.

OP you definitely need to take this further. Dentist was probably trying to save money, they seem to try and worm out of providing braces whenever they can. And talk to your son and persuade him to answer in his best interests next time.

Based on?... your opinion?
You can keep just making stuff up to suit yourself, too, I guess...

Exactly! Most kids would no. It’s like if a nurse said “Do you want to have your blood taken?” I’d say absolutely not but do it anyway as it’s for greater good (as I wince in the chair almost crying, reluctantly giving her my arm 😂)

You can keep saying “no. Just no.”, but you’re incorrect.