To be annoyed at friend for taking her kid to A&E so often

Jesus wept.

Yes to this. My husband is from Poland. Last week our son (we live in the uk) was off sick with a cold/cough/mild fever (he’s 4) and I got a proper judgy pants text from my MIL asking why I “haven’t taken x to see a doctor? He won’t recover if he doesn’t get medicine!”. The medicine she means is antibiotics. I got my husband to explain that he doesn’t need ‘medicine’ (other than otc, calpol, etc) and antibiotics are utterly useless for a VIRUS such as the common cold. It drives me mad 😂no one ever puts a lick of sun cream on but will rush off for antiBIOTICS for a bloody virus 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

@August1980 The drunks are also a problem. The fact that we already have a problem doesn't mean that it's okay for someone to cause another problem, quite unnecessarily and deliberately. It's time for that mother to grow up. If she's so insecure about cleaning a grazed nose, I suggest she buys a family first aid book. If she can't cope with that, she should self-finance a basic first aid course. You can go on ones designed for parents and childminders.

Hmm, there are people who go out on a Saturday night and then end up in a&e to sober up… I think that’s more of a waste of time:money for the healthcare stated than a parent who is worried about their child:

Same for American family. When they visit, their kids always have a ‘fever’ (they’re fine) and then mom and kids end up at the GP surgery making a fuss (then are told to give them Calpol).
Massive eye rolls from everyone else

We all know that the NHS is in a terrible state. It's because it's in a terrible state that the last thing we need is people like the OP's friend abusing the system. Nobody is going to die from a grazed nose. The friend knows this. And she knows the NHS is in crisis - she lives in the UK long term and her husband is English. She is surrounded by the English news media. There is no excuse for what she's doing.

Let's hope this happens. Ridiculous piss taker.

As someone who has seen a sick relative lying on a trolley for hours in A&E, piss takers who are there when they shouldn't be annoy me too.

Tell her that A&E stands for ACCIDENT AND EMERGENCY, not ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING.
I imagine her English is good enough to understand that so maybe she will get the hint.

I knew someone who took his 4 year old to a&e with chicken pox. Perfectly healthy otherwise and not especially suffering with it. Just to be on the safe side. Probably spread it to some very vulnerable people. Lunacy

Your friend needs to be careful. Taking her child so often to the GP or hospital could cause concern to the professionals and other services could become involved which your friend will not like at all...No one wants it to go this far....

Not your child, not your problem. If she wants to waste hours of their life sitting in a&e unnecessarily, that’s on them 🤷🏼‍♀️

The only thing I might have taken to A&E would be the cough if it had been going in for a long time or the child was very ill, but I’d go to GP first (DS had bronchiolitis as a baby and we ended up in A&E via the GP).

Contrary to popular belief, it’s not that hard to get a GP appt for a child although I wouldn’t take for a graze, or fever unless it was dangerously high. Obv it’s then an A&E job anyway - but you can google re high temps and usually tell by a child’s demeanour.

if she hadn’t got high anxiety/health anxiety then she’s got the use of A&E completely wrong. Is there a walk-in near you as they can be v useful when a GP isn’t available- I’ve used ours many times for me and DC over the years.

if it’s a cultural thing. Surely she’s got the memo by now that A&E is a horrible place that no-one should be accessing unless in dire need.

OP should butt out.

Yes some people do worry about minor ailments and go to the GP or A&E too much.

Doctors know this and deal with it regularly. They also deal with other people who should seek medical help but avoid health care professionals.

It's between the patient and the health care provider, nothing for a 'friend' to get annoyed about.

Have you tried understanding why your friend is so worried?

When my gran started with dementia, one of the first signs was that she kept telling people to get the doctor round (because in her mind, it was the 90s, and the family GP always wanted to come to see ill children at home).
Admittedly not for all these reasons!
But I heard an AE nurse say a lot of people just turn up there because they can't get in at the GP.

Yep, fully aware 👍🏼

Just to point out it is free at point of delivery which most others aren’t

This.
I wrote on that thread early yesterday about my son being fobbed off repeatedly by GP and walk in doctors and when I insisted on going to A and E everyone was eye rolling at my " Spanish" overreaction.

And at A and E my son was instantly admitted to hospital!!

Definitely some cultural differences. In Spain we wouldn't hesitate to go wherever necessary to get prompt medical attention.

The Snapchat and selfie stuff is not Spanish though. That's just international arseholery attention seeking.

I can imagine it’s confusing to move to a system where there are a lot of barriers to accessing care. I’ve never waited more than 15 minutes in a Spanish A&E but usually we wait less. You can always see a paediatrician the same day (and they do have better knowledge of child-specific things like croup than a GP). I’ve called an ambulance 4 times for my children and they arrive in 5–8 minutes.
However, I’ve also noticed that some parents of all nationalities and backgrounds find it really hard to judge when to consult a doctor, particularly when neither they nor their children have ever had any kind of serious illness.
I would assume that the triage in your local a&e is working and stops her literally killing people by attending, as some have suggested. I’m sure they can also suggest to her how better to access care if they don’t think she should be there.

Agree! Ppl are so precious about the NHS when it’s a pile of crap when it comes to it.

Agreed.
Strange competitive pride in never having been to A&E or never bothering a doctor.

I know this shaming attitude leads to people ,who need help, delaying and suffering consequences.

NHS is absolutely dreadful, we should not count ourselves ‘lucky’ to see a doctor.

As for women’s health services, as a society we should be ashamed.

Leave your friend alone, she obviously is used to a proactive health service.

Even a visit to a GP isn't necessary in some of those cases.

This is what I find the most shocking:
"For some reason we are expected to not complain and be nothing but grateful even when we are permanently harmed by poor care"
Thinking about the country where I grew up, there are many things that don't work well but the healthcare is actually pretty good compared to the NHS. However, people complain about the service they get a lot more than in the UK and there definitely isn't the concept of being a burden - if you're worried, you should see a doctor, if for nothing else than reassurance.

As an example, my husband was recently diagnosed with a pretty serious, not life threatening but unpleasant condition. GP wouldn't see him despite concerning symptoms . GP prescribed him one set of antibiotics and when they didn't work and had side effects, they have him another type of antibiotics??
This without any tests whatsoever.
I made my husband see private GP as we were desperate, we were prepared to pay for private check up yet the doctor actually told him to go straight to the urgent care centre where they kept my husband the whole day!
Guess what - now my husband needs the "fit note's from the GP but despite being off work for almost 2 weeks, GP offered him a phone call for next week! Apparently fit notes can be backdated, so why bother?
My takeaway from all this is that you actually need to go to A&E if gp doesn't help you, and you need to make a huge fuss otherwise good luck being seen

first time parents need that reassurance it’s a bit horrible to sit there and judge them. doubt anyone would want to sit in a waiting room with a poorly child for six hours unless they really felt the need or needed medical reassurance from a DOCTOR not google.

Just reflecting on all the comments about different cultures and different health care around the world...

Yes, it's not good to aviod the drs with genuinely concerning symptoms, but A&E for a graze is ridiculous and people in other countries demanding antibiotics for a cold (a virus!!! Not a bacterial infection!) isn't just pointless- it's actively damaging- antibiotic resistance affects everyone- so I don't understand why so many people view this as good health care just because the patient gets what they want.

Also, I'm not convinced that every ailment needs to be seen by a specialist. "What's your speciality Dr?" "Grazes"

I wondered about that, too...