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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

"Can I take you out for a meal"?

318 replies

RachelTopliss · 22/09/2025 20:16

Would you find this odd? It sounds like it's come from the 70s. What's a meal anyway? It sounds creepy. Lunch or dinner maybe yes but a meal?

I said I was busy.

OP posts:
Plastictreees · 22/09/2025 21:18

123dontcomeatme · 22/09/2025 21:15

I dont think it's a normal word. Ive not heard anyone say that since about 1985. People say ' go out for dinner/ supper '

Maybe it's a north/ south thing?

I think it might be. Although I now live in Scotland and I don’t hear it here either. Maybe it’s a generational thing too, as my parents say it.

MyElatedUmberFinch · 22/09/2025 21:17

123dontcomeatme · 22/09/2025 21:15

I dont think it's a normal word. Ive not heard anyone say that since about 1985. People say ' go out for dinner/ supper '

Maybe it's a north/ south thing?

I say it all the time, I often offer to take my friend or DC out for a meal or my DH and I go out for a meal.

Hysterectomynext · 22/09/2025 21:16

He’s imagining you with a horsebag

Crazyworldmum · 22/09/2025 21:15

Hummmm why is it weird ? How old are you ?

123dontcomeatme · 22/09/2025 21:15

I dont think it's a normal word. Ive not heard anyone say that since about 1985. People say ' go out for dinner/ supper '

Maybe it's a north/ south thing?

MyElatedUmberFinch · 22/09/2025 21:12

I would be happy with a ‘meal’ or ‘picky bits’.

QueenClinomania · 22/09/2025 21:11

The words themselves are perfectly normal so unless he said them while fondling his cock and making sex noises, Yabu

Plastictreees · 22/09/2025 21:10

I think you’ve got some harsh responses, I know what you mean OP. The word ‘meal’ gives me the ick for some reason. I would always say ‘going out for lunch / dinner’. I also hate the term ‘a bite to eat’.

londongirl12 · 22/09/2025 21:08

If this was for a date, you could find yourself single for a while if you keep pushing people away for no good reason.

landlordhell · 22/09/2025 21:05

What’s a meal??? Do you not know? Jeez he had a lucky escape didn’t he?

landlordhell · 22/09/2025 21:04

Tillow4ever · 22/09/2025 20:18

You’re being very weird.

This

Trafficwardentina · 22/09/2025 21:04

RachelTopliss · 22/09/2025 20:16

Would you find this odd? It sounds like it's come from the 70s. What's a meal anyway? It sounds creepy. Lunch or dinner maybe yes but a meal?

I said I was busy.

I’m with you here OP. Winds me up. Not sure why, probably the implicit indecision. I’d say it’s easily as bad as ‘picky bits’ which is also atrocious.

I’m prepared to be called out as odd.

123dontcomeatme · 22/09/2025 21:03

Op, I agree with you.

I think it's quite old fashioned language that is dated. Depending on your ages it would weird me out even more.

No one under 40 talks like that, but then I also get the ick when men talk about enjoying watching box sets like it's 2002.

Old , stuck in the past and I take as a sign we are not a match.

whatasillygoose · 22/09/2025 21:02

TheAquaCrab · 22/09/2025 20:20

I agree OP. Although I can’t explain why - a bloke once asked me out and said he’d get some ‘nice picky bits in’. I never turned up! Argh, what a cringe

Yeah I agree too but also can’t really verbalise why.

Would you like to go for dinner/lunch/a meal? Fine.

Take you out for… Sounds a bit eurgh to me. I don’t need to be ‘taken out’ or treated.

Zanatdy · 22/09/2025 21:01

That’s a perfectly normal thing to say. A meal is exactly that, either lunch or dinner. Don’t really understand what you find so odd about it tbh.

ThisCanFuckOffToo · 22/09/2025 21:01

Sounds like a perfectly respectable way to ask someone out on a date!

Are you more used to Netflix n chill types?

Enigma54 · 22/09/2025 21:00

Totally normal!!

Allthesnowallthetime · 22/09/2025 20:59

I thought you were offering there, OP, and came on here to accept...

PegDope · 22/09/2025 20:58

I’m rarely shocked on here anymore but you’ve done it OP.

Yes it’s weird. And I mean your reaction.

He’s had a lucky escape IMO.

WFHforevermore · 22/09/2025 20:55

The fact you find it creepy, makes you super creepy.....ekkkk, how does your mind work 😱

TY78910 · 22/09/2025 20:28

“According to the Oxford Advanced American Dictionary, a meal is defined as an occasion when people sit down to eat food, such as breakfast, lunch, or dinner, or it can refer to the food itself eaten at that time.”

what is the issue?

fluffiphlox · 22/09/2025 20:27

I despair. A perfectly normal question met with bafflement and contempt. ‘Yes please’ or ‘No thank you’.

Rustymoo01 · 22/09/2025 20:27

Seems perfectly normal to me.

TY78910 · 22/09/2025 20:26

Tillow4ever · 22/09/2025 20:18

You’re being very weird.

^

FirstdatesFred · 22/09/2025 20:25

"Go out for a meal" = totally normal phrase