DD and boyfriend are wasting their lives

You should be proud of your child for pursuing the activities that make her happy. You should also be relieved that she has found someone who is on the same page as her. Now focus on what makes YOU fulfilled 🙂

You are so mean. What do you mean boring? You sound arrogant and not very interesting yourself.

Are you just projecting your own regrets at having not done certain things on to them?

You are so interfering, it’s annoying.

Usually people who are satisfied with their surroundings lead a fulfilling life. Not everyone cares to travel the world. Many travel the world for the wrong reasons.
They will travel outside UK when they want. If you like you go ahead and live your life the way you think it should be lived.

This. The OP must think we're all stupid if she thinks putting a 😂 on the end of many bitchy comments about her daughter means we can't see through her. And then had the audacity to get upset about being called out.

Their life sounds blissful and how wonderful that they are so well-matched. They deserve better than nasty judgement from you and your friends. Leave them alone!

What lovely friends you have, all sitting there laughing about your dd's life choices.

With a mum like you she doesn't need enemies, you are just nasty. All the laughing emoji about the activities she likes. Your really are a nasty piece of work.

Times have changed and you’re being the arse here. How dare grown adults walk their dogs in the country, popping into a pub for lunch, baking cookies….. Dear me. This isn’t a waste of a life, this to me sounds bloody perfect. They sound sensible and extremely comfortable and grounded. You should be proud instead of condescending. Your daughter has grown up in a different time which differs vastly from the time you grew up. Sounds like she’s smart and someone to be proud of, doesn’t follow the flock and is her own person.

Not everybody has to find happiness in the way you find happiness.

You've said your piece to her, by all accounts, and you might be proved right or you might be proved wrong. But continuing to needle at her about doing things your way is just a recipe for resentment and upset, and it sounds like you've realised that now.

For what it's worth I'm a fair bit more like your daughter than I am you (though I like a bit more travel than your daughter, it seems), and always have been. I don't feel that I've missed out on anything and 'waste' to me would have looked a lot more like your idea of fun! Horses for courses.

They sound just like me.I was never one for going to night clubs or drinking.This was in the 70's and 80's. I went on walking holidays with my boyfriend of the time, in this country & abroad. We both went out walking with a walking group on Sundays.

Some people don’t know how lucky they are. Your daughter and boyfriend are not taking drugs/unemployed/living in your spare room/have 6 kids. Get my point. Let them live the life they want.

Their life sounds like a dream!
Leave them alone.

You wont be told will you. The message is quite clear, stick your neck in and mind your business.

I’m a 28 year old who loves staying in and doing crafts, doesn’t like to drink or go out, and i certainly don’t think that kind of life is boring. I’ve always hate ‘parties’ and the people in that scene are just not my type of people and thats ok. I have been abroad (to Japan this year), but only because I finally felt comfortable doing so.
My dad is now in his 50s and was very much the same and he doesnt regret it! He’s never been abroad and never wants to go. Never been a partier, doesn't drink, ect. Which is why my party girl mum has never given me grief about the way I live.
It would honestly break my heart if I found out my mum was talking about me the way you are talking about your daughter. Being so judgmental just because she’s not doing the exact same thing you did in your twenties is honestly embarrassing…everyone is different, some people just want a nice quiet life with the people they love doing things they love to do.

I moved to wider concerns because this thread was a total pile on with no nuance. The op did not come across well but I was trying to see if there may be any grain of truth behind her discomfort - there often is.

none of us know this couple - so my assumptions are just the same as your assumptions. I think on a thread with this much engagement it sometimes bears a bit of a wider discussion rather than the usual “leave them alone” narrative. Which is valid but can get quite dull after nearly 900 posts… I am also bringing my lived and professional experience to a situation i see happening in that generation that may or may not apply to them.

Sounds like lovely wholesome relationship. Unlike me, who’s late teens and early twenties are a blur of things I really wish I hadn’t done.

My DD and her partner are 26. They spend time going for walks,visiting gardens, baking and cooking. My DD loves jigsaws and painting. Her DP spends time in the park litter picking. If you ask me its a wholesome life, and much more enriching than going clubbing and getting pissed. Leave them be...

Wow, you’re the mother from hell! I’m not surprised your daughter is annoyed with you trying to control their lives. In fact, she might be doing the opposite of what you’re did because she doesn’t want to end up like you.

They’re obviously happy doing what they’re doing, keep your nose out and mind your own business.

Glad youre not my mum.

They are ‘living’ their lives. What you valued is different.

My friends all went to discos (clubbing) in their late teens, particularly on Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve. I preferred to babysit for double-time and save my money. I never did like clubbing. Your DD and her boyfriend sound like they are thoroughly enjoying their lifestyle. Good luck to them!

Sometimes more outrageous fun doesn't seem safe enough to try unless / until you've sorted out your finances to be comfortable. Are they saving for a house/wedding/children/paying off debt?

Are they doing ongoing study for careers? Or working in really demanding roles - their weekends sound appealing to lots of people because they're a relief from the busy-ness of the working week.

Working in fields where pictures of them enjoying themselves in perfectly legal ways put on social media would be a problem?

Your other possibility is that they're going to sex clubs or similar as well as doing the walking trips and not discussing it with you because nobody discusses their sex life with their parents.

The world also doesn't feel as safe now as it did pre 2016 or so. Trump, Brexit, COVID, Palestine+ Israel, Musk etc. If you're interested in international travel and do some research you can do it safely but if it's of low interest in the first place it's easy to see why they'd pick UK things.

They might find good walking trips in Wales / Scotland, including some mountaineering ones which would fit most people's descriptions of more adventurous/ a bit risky even with safety precautions. Northern Ireland and Ireland are also worth a look re walking trips.

I would be super proud that they are doing what they want and happy - so many people don't. I dont think they will regret anything!

What a disgusting attitude to have.

Calling your own child and their partner “boring” because they don’t go out drinking or go on foreign holidays.

I’m fucking appalled. What type of mother thinks like this?

I sometimes jokingly tell my daughter than uni is wasted on her because she is so “sensible” - but she is happy and we are different people.

Don't we all just want our children to be healthy and happy? Sounds like these young people have their heads screwed on better than some of us at that age had.