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Should I have lied?

164 replies

Lillylillyflower · 22/09/2025 15:12

I recently broke up with my partner of 10+ years. Despite breaking up and telling him to move out he's still here quite often, he showers here, eats here and has said that he needs to sleep in the sofa until he sorts out accommodation.

My little sister has been staying with me over the summer until she goes back to uni. I obviously told her about our breakup but nothing more. The other day he asked me if I had told her that we had broken up, I said yes. He said he found it weird that she was staying up late considering he needed to sleep in the sofa and asked whether she was doing it on purpose so he couldn't sleep there because I told him I didn't want him staying in the house. I told him that she wasn't and didn't know anything about him staying in the sofa or me wanting him out because she didn't.

My sister found out today and was annoyed at me for telling him. She said it makes it awkward for her whilst he's still around the house and she's here for another 2 weeks until she goes back to uni.She said I should have lied to keep her out of it but I don't think I should have. She thinks I should have lied and said I didn't tell her to keep her from being involved and avoid any awkwardness. I don't think I should have lied and that there's no reason for it to be awkward. Am I being unreasonable for thinking she's overreacting?

OP posts:
Lillylillyflower · 22/09/2025 15:48

Luxio · 22/09/2025 15:44

Have you actually told him to move out because it doesn't sound like he thinks he needs to be in any rush to leave?

I just told him I don't want to be with him anymore. I assumed he will move out cause I didn't think he will still be living here after I told him this. He didn't say give me time to move out. He only said I will sleep in the sofa if that will make you happy

OP posts:
Izzywizzy85 · 22/09/2025 15:47

Tell him to get tf out your house. So weird, it’s none of his business how late your sister stays up.
Youre being an absolute doormat. Tell him to get him shit together an leave, today!

GlastoNinja · 22/09/2025 15:47

You need to tell him to go. Clearly.

I don’t think he knows you’ve split up

Fruitlips · 22/09/2025 15:46

If you are as clear in RL, as you are on this thread, he probably has bugger all idea what’s going on!

Luxio · 22/09/2025 15:44

Have you actually told him to move out because it doesn't sound like he thinks he needs to be in any rush to leave?

BallerinaRadio · 22/09/2025 15:42

You said straight away you'd told him to move out but have you actually told him this? Not assumed or guessed his actions... Have you told him to move out?

If so what on earth is he still doing there and why are you allowing it?

Lillylillyflower · 22/09/2025 15:38

JellyBeanSpring25 · 22/09/2025 15:37

Whose house is it?

Mine

OP posts:
JellyBeanSpring25 · 22/09/2025 15:37

Whose house is it?

Lillylillyflower · 22/09/2025 15:34

Fruitlips · 22/09/2025 15:31

And this just got odder

Yes. I would have thought he will be moving out .I told him I didn't want to be with him 2 weeks ago

OP posts:
Fruitlips · 22/09/2025 15:31

Lillylillyflower · 22/09/2025 15:30

He didn't even discuss moving out. When I told him he can't sleep in the bedroom. He said he will sleep in the sofa if that will make me happy. I feel like sleeping in the sofa but still living there defeats the purpose of the break up.

And this just got odder

Lillylillyflower · 22/09/2025 15:30

ItsOnlyHobnobs · 22/09/2025 15:17

When did you actually split up? What’s the expected timeline for him to move out?

He didn't even discuss moving out. When I told him he can't sleep in the bedroom. He said he will sleep in the sofa if that will make me happy. I feel like sleeping in the sofa but still living there defeats the purpose of the break up.

OP posts:
Someonelookedatmypostinghistorysoichanged · 22/09/2025 15:25

Why is he still there and why do you think it’s your job to fulfil this need.
your sis is being ridiculous, she’s an adult, act like own. People split up, so what.

ItsOnlyHobnobs · 22/09/2025 15:17

When did you actually split up? What’s the expected timeline for him to move out?

Fruitlips · 22/09/2025 15:16

So so much odd about this
from start, to finish

this is your home? You wouldn’t think so!