AIBU to refuse to give my mother any information about my finances. I am a 42 year old professional.
she walked into my new house and first question she asked was how much did this cost then? She then asked how much I got for selling another property. She then continually asked how much my business cost to partner in with. She is now asking if we will send our children to private school and how much this will cost. She asks when my husband is planning to retire as he ‘must have plenty of money now’. She asks how much of our property I own (we are married). She looks up the cost of our holidays and drops it into conversation how much it costs when I know I would never have told her. When I get awkward and do not answer these questions, she tries other family members to get the information. None of which know the answer as no one else has ever asked me or seemed to care.
without a drip feed i barely speak to my mother following years of abuse and neglect as a child, none of my siblings take much to do with her either so these comments are within the short spells of spending anytime / short phone calls with her. I would want no contact in an ideal world but i tried that and she turns up to my house demanding i talk to her which is very upsetting and not worth my mental health. I strongly suspect she has a personality disorder. I worked 3 jobs at times to fund my way through university whilst using all the loans / bursaries i could. I made my way to university aged 18 on a train with a bin liner to hold my things as we could not afford a suitcase. She was never that interested in me until very recently when in her mind ‘i made it’.
yanbu to think this is a strange questioning dynamic or yabu your mother should know these things about you.