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AIBU?

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Original poster

Random drunk stuck his head through my open living room window and scared me senseless

187 replies

Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 01:52

I know I’m not being unreasonable but just need to say this somewhere as I’m a bit speechless. I live on a road either just a few houses and a golf club. No pavement on the road and it’s a bendy country road so very rare we get people walking it, but it is just a few hundred meters before you get to the pavement and streets heading into the little town.

I’m up late working and there’s obviously some event on at the golf club that must have ended around 1am as I heard drunk people walking up to the town, happens every so often after an event at the club. It’s warm here so I’ve got the living room window open, and I was writing so looking down when I heard laughing outside and a noise, which was my window being pulled further open. I looked up as a man put his head through the window whilst making stupid laddy drunk noises and a gurning face. I did actually scream and jumped up. It all happened in seconds and I actually went towards the window, where there is a table by the window and it had some kid’s toys on it so I grabbed one of the plastic chuck and swung for the guy as he ducked his head back outside. I saw a him run back to a few other lads and they then ran off up the road.

It was obviously a “prank” by some drunk idiots but it’s really shaken me. I think I’ll be popping down to the golf club in the morning to have a word and see if I can find out whose party it was but it’s not like anything will come of it even if I can track down whoever had the invite list.

I’m just shaken and quite angry about it, not really sure what else to say.

OP posts:
SilverCamellia · 22/09/2025 09:15

GarlicPint · 22/09/2025 01:57

I can understand you needing to get that out and tell someone!

Yes, quite a shock and potentially scary in the moment. But also quite funny.
Hope the toy wasn't damaged.

Yes. Hilarious. Not.

wrongthinker · 22/09/2025 09:03

That's awful, OP. I think I would have called the police. You still could, and sounds like they would be easily able to find out who did this.

It's not remotely funny, it's extremely threatening. I doubt very much this man would have done the same if he'd looked in the window and saw a man sitting alone.

The people telling you to get over it or saying they think it's funny are just fucking clowns. They have no clue about anything. They're just here to be nasty arseholes to any woman posting. It's not just your thread, OP, they are all over this site now. Ignore them.

warmapplepies · 22/09/2025 09:01

itsnotagameshow · 22/09/2025 08:44

It's victim blaming at its finest, you don't have to justify your reaction or explain further, OP.

Those of you going on about why the window was open in the first place should take a long hard look at yourselves.

Exactly. Some of these responses are so fucking depressing.

No33 · 22/09/2025 08:56

Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 08:54

I see why people don’t come to mumsnet for reassurance anymore.

Thanks to those who have said they’d also feel a bit upset by it; makes me feel less stupid. But the “cool girl” responses just confirm that there’s no point at all in trying to find out who it is to have a word since apparently, it’s a totally normal thing for someone to do.

Yeah, MN is a viper pit for no reason these days. It's sad.

I hope you're doing okay

Elphamouche · 22/09/2025 08:56

I’d have called the police so you reacted more calm than I would have!!

Original poster
Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 08:54

I see why people don’t come to mumsnet for reassurance anymore.

Thanks to those who have said they’d also feel a bit upset by it; makes me feel less stupid. But the “cool girl” responses just confirm that there’s no point at all in trying to find out who it is to have a word since apparently, it’s a totally normal thing for someone to do.

OP posts:
Volpini · 22/09/2025 08:51

Ratafia · 22/09/2025 08:38

How is putting his head through a window climbing half way in?

And where are you that it's warm enough to have a window open at 1am?

Show quote history

Where are YOU living that a woman working in her own living room, late at night, with a window open is in the wrong for a man getting pissed and encroaching on her property!!!??? That she’s out of order for wanting to express how much it scared her in a seemingly safe place a mere hours later?

PollyBell · 22/09/2025 08:49

itsnotagameshow · 22/09/2025 08:44

It's victim blaming at its finest, you don't have to justify your reaction or explain further, OP.

Those of you going on about why the window was open in the first place should take a long hard look at yourselves.

Victim of what?

Original poster
Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 08:48

I live in a very small town. If I chat to someone at the golf club (or just ask on Facebook) then I’ll know who hired it for whatever party it was and it’s more than likely they’ll be able to figure out who it was if I can give a rough description of what he was wearing. Then words can be had.

I’m not tattling to the golf club because I expect them to do anything about it.

Bravo to all the cool girls though who would just laugh along with the guy and not feel a bit taken aback by a man doing that.

OP posts:
TallulahLikesHoola · 22/09/2025 08:48

itsnotagameshow · 22/09/2025 08:44

It's victim blaming at its finest, you don't have to justify your reaction or explain further, OP.

Those of you going on about why the window was open in the first place should take a long hard look at yourselves.

Abso-fucking-lutely!!
All these bloody 'hey I'm cool wouldn't bother me' girls are ridiculous, and the pp blaming the OP for having her own window open?! ODFOD!!

scalt · 22/09/2025 08:45

Yes we do need to make a fuss about things like this. Allowing it to pass sets a precedent, gives them a yardstick for what they can get away with, and emboldens them.

In an ideal world, the overstretched police would not be wasting time on things like this, but too bad.

itsnotagameshow · 22/09/2025 08:44

It's victim blaming at its finest, you don't have to justify your reaction or explain further, OP.

Those of you going on about why the window was open in the first place should take a long hard look at yourselves.

Original poster
Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 08:41

IWasScaredToBeHeld · 22/09/2025 08:34

Did he stick his head in the window, or “half climb” into the house?

Show quote history

My window was open about an inch, He’s pulled it open, put his hands onto the inside ledge and pulled his body up so his head and shoulders could get up “into” my house, with his arms then fully on the inside ledge to hold himself in (because it’s too high up to be able to stick your head in with your feet on the ground). His head, shoulders/upper body and arms were fully on the inside on the window, in my house.

The window is one which the bottom length is the part that opens and swings out so he was underneath it and inside my home.

At 1am, having a man pull open my window and pull himself up under it to grab my interior windowsill, it is quite frightening. I made a post on here simply saying I was quite shaken and then you come on and tell me to just get over it as if I’ve done something wrong?

Whats wrong with you?

OP posts:
Ratafia · 22/09/2025 08:38

Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 08:28

Needs to move on from it? Bloody hell. It happened late last night. I’ve just come back in so am replying. It’s hardly like I’ve been banging on about it for a week.

You ever had a strange man just half climb his way into your house in the middle of the night? While you’re a single woman with two kids in bed. Why don’t you just move on from it. So easy.

Show quote history

How is putting his head through a window climbing half way in?

And where are you that it's warm enough to have a window open at 1am?

Driftingawaynow · 22/09/2025 08:38

Not funny!

EmeraldShamrock000 · 22/09/2025 08:37

I hope you're okay, he's lucky you didn’t whack him over the head.
I would report the idiot. He cannot be doing that.

itsnotagameshow · 22/09/2025 08:36

That's awful, I am so sorry OP. Why people are minimising this, I really have no idea, the growing lack of emotional intelligence and willingness to stick the boot in on this forum is quite depressing. I would complain in writing to the golf club (mentioning you heard the noise of drunken people walking past at chucking out time and then the incident happened so you can only assume they came from the club). The club might then push the point at events that people should consider neighbours and not be a nuisance etc: they should take it seriously as down the line, if other incidents happen, it would affect their licencing.

Igmum · 22/09/2025 08:35

I’d be terrified too OP. I like the suggestions of reporting it to the club committee and the licensing authorities (and frankly, if you live in a small place and they were walking home then someone at the club probably has a pretty good idea of who they were).

IWasScaredToBeHeld · 22/09/2025 08:34

Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 08:28

Needs to move on from it? Bloody hell. It happened late last night. I’ve just come back in so am replying. It’s hardly like I’ve been banging on about it for a week.

You ever had a strange man just half climb his way into your house in the middle of the night? While you’re a single woman with two kids in bed. Why don’t you just move on from it. So easy.

Show quote history

Did he stick his head in the window, or “half climb” into the house?

Volpini · 22/09/2025 08:33

I totally get how you’re feeling.
When we moved into our house, we had works that had to be done and had scaffolding all around the building. One night, we had gone to bed we heard a load of noise outside on the street. I went to the window to have a look out and when I pulled the curtain back there was a person the other side of the glass inches from my face… It frightened the life out of me (and probably them, too because I screamed my head off.) We called the police and they were here very fast - I think in hindsight it was someone drunk with their mates - thank god he didn’t fall when I scared him - but it was terrifying and a massive shock to see someone‘s face peering into my first floor bedroom window.

As I type this, I also remember a time when I lived in a converted Victorian house and my flat was right at the top of the building. You could only get in via intercom and no one had buzzed me so when I heard the knock at the door, I thought it must have been a neighbour - didn’t even look through the spyhole. I opened the door to a middle aged drunk man swaying and incoherent. It completely freaked me out as so unexpected - it was about 10pm on a Friday night and my partner was out and the flat next door was vacant at the time so it dawned on me how vulnerable I was in that moment. With hindsight, the bloke was out of it and no real threat to me - he was just confused and in the wrong building. But these things are really upsetting at the time. I was less mad with this drunk bloke and more furious with whoever had buzzed him in.

Hopefully this shock will pass. I totally understand your fury.

Original poster
Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 08:28

IWasScaredToBeHeld · 22/09/2025 08:26

But again, OP doesn’t know they’ve come from the club. Despite her insistence that they have - she doesn’t know that. They could easily be drunk, wandering in the wrong direction and be lost. OP needs to move on from it and accept it was a drunken idiot doing something silly.

Show quote history

Needs to move on from it? Bloody hell. It happened late last night. I’ve just come back in so am replying. It’s hardly like I’ve been banging on about it for a week.

You ever had a strange man just half climb his way into your house in the middle of the night? While you’re a single woman with two kids in bed. Why don’t you just move on from it. So easy.

OP posts:
IWasScaredToBeHeld · 22/09/2025 08:26

Antimimisti · 22/09/2025 08:24

Yes, so it is in the club's interests to do what they can to keep it that way.

Show quote history

But again, OP doesn’t know they’ve come from the club. Despite her insistence that they have - she doesn’t know that. They could easily be drunk, wandering in the wrong direction and be lost. OP needs to move on from it and accept it was a drunken idiot doing something silly.

Antimimisti · 22/09/2025 08:24

IWasScaredToBeHeld · 22/09/2025 08:19

But this is a one off?

I do have to say, a lot of people are overreacting on this thread! Yes it would shake OP up, but it doesn’t really go further than that.

Show quote history

Yes, so it is in the club's interests to do what they can to keep it that way.

Original poster
Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 08:24

IWasScaredToBeHeld · 22/09/2025 08:19

OP also doesn’t actually know whether the person came from the golf club or not! She’s just assumed - she says that people walk from the golf club to town along her road. That implies that they could also be walking from town to their home!

No, there is literally nothing else here.

We’re down a country road with no pavement. There are 4 houses dotted along and then the golf clubhouse. We are surrounded by fields out the front and to the side, then the golf course down the back. When you head along to leave our road, you get to the road into our tiny little town with a pavement. If someone I walking past my house and running off in the direction of town, then they’ve come from the golf club. Especially on a night when I know there’s been an event on as others have walked past throughout the night, when usually we have zero foot traffic.

OP posts:
IWasScaredToBeHeld · 22/09/2025 08:19

OP also doesn’t actually know whether the person came from the golf club or not! She’s just assumed - she says that people walk from the golf club to town along her road. That implies that they could also be walking from town to their home!