Random drunk stuck his head through my open living room window and scared me senseless

Drunk dickhead aside, where you live sounds absolutely lovely.

Christ almighty! Wtf should OP or anyone else do this? Smacks of victim blaming, the OP is perfectly entitled to have a window open, she’s explained why several times.

Well done OP. Don't feel bad about the outcome. This lad has learnt an important life lesson the hard way and hopefully won't repeat his idiotic behaviour.

Try to not focus on the "cool girls" who tried to victim blame you on the thread. It's the reason I don't create my own posts on here. Even when you contribute on a thread you often get someone calling you out for stating a fairly innocent opinion. There's a lot of bitchy, unpleasant keyboard warriors on MN.

Well that's good that he has had consequences. Quite confident for a newbie wasn't he? I bet that's taken him down several pegs.

You should have had a fly screen on it. No one should physically be able to half climb his way into your house. You should have had your window fixed so that's not possible. Especially as you're vulnerable with 2 kids. That would be hard to get over, but your house is clearly not secure and you need to fix it.

That's scary but a window should not be able to have someone's head through like that. That means any burglar can climb through the window. If he can stick his head through the window, he can climb in through the window. You could have left the room for a minute, come back, and find he is standing in the room after climbing in. You really need to get an insect/fly screen on it.

@ThatBlackCat some do. I hate it when a fly gets in 🙁

Don't people have fly screens on their windows in the UK? Where I am it's rare that a window is without the mesh screen, and that it's even possible to stick a head through even a wide open window.

Exactly. I highly doubt there’d be any sympathy for them either.

I would have been scared and then furious, I’m so glad you have reported it to the club as it’s totally unacceptable. You have the right to feel safe in your own home.

OP I have just caught up on this post. Please do not feel bad for this person. I understand they’re only 19, and we all did stupid things in our younger days. But this is a life lesson for this person. If it wasn’t you, it would have been someone else. This person chose to act in this way, and actions have consequences.
This young person will be ok. They’ve made a silly, idiotic mistake but they’ll get another job and hopefully learn from this mistake.
I’d say it’s well justified considering what they did. This could have happened to a little old woman of 85 years old.
I understand you feeling a bit of remorse that they’ve lost their job, but this was a bit beyond normal silly drunkenness of singing in the street. I’m glad for you they’ve had to face the consequences!

This makes me think - what if there was a very large dog such as a Bully or some other stereotypically aggressive breed (sorry I’m a cat person so don’t know much about dogs) who happened to be laying there and attacked the man? That would just show them (the idiot leaning their head in to someone’s home) the consequences to be honest.

Police and contact golf club. Utterly unacceptable behaviour. I’m really sorry you had to experience that, especially in your own home.
What absolute morons.

Can’t believe some of these shitty posts.
OP you are 100% right with how you felt. I would have been terrified.

I’m so glad he has hopefully learnt his lesson. You should definitely not feel bad for the shit losing his job. If I was his mother he would have been round today apologising.

oh sod off with your victim blaming - she SHOULD be able to have a window open ANY bloody time she likes!!! It’s HER house.

and ps not all on Mumsnet are in the UK!

There are a lot of men out there who enjoy frightening women or people who are vulnerable for whatever reason. Plenty of MN threads about men who follow women for no reason other than scaring them. Hopefully this experience will stop him from developing into one of those men.

I hope you’re you’re okay. Next time he might poke his head through a window where a big burly bloke is sitting on the couch.
I must admit I’m laughing because I read your thread title as Random Duck 🤣instead of random drunk.

@Bobiverse Sorry just read your updates - good outcome!

I agree you shouldn’t just be expected to move on from it. This sounds very frightening. We have one window right next to a busy public area and have had the odd bit of antisocial behaviour from kids, but never adults. I would be scared by a man doing that.

Yes, the man might’ve come from elsewhere but it’s extremely unlikely and anyone you report it to - golf club, police - will know that, on the balance of probability, this man has been at the golf club event. As I’m sure you know, when you report something, you don’t need absolute proof. Police and the council etc are interested in patterns. Evidence comes in many forms including (and significantly) what people report.

Maybe nothing will be done this time but if you report it and antisocial behaviour happens again you’ve got evidence of a pattern starting to form. Don’t report it and the next time will be the ‘first’ time it’s happened in terms of record.

To give you an example, we have a small open-air venue near our house which is accessible to the public at all times, including the night. A few years ago we had an issue with someone going in at night and playing very loud music. The first time, we did nothing as we hoped it might be a one-off (I hate nuisance noise but generally try to persuade myself to be ‘reasonable’ about one-offs!). The second and third time, we reported it and nobody came out. Fourth time, we reported it again and I said that I was going over myself to deal with it because we were sick of it not being dealt with. Two officers were then sent very quickly, dealt with the man quickly (I was there as I’d still gone over anyway, and it was just one guy with massive speakers; he actually seemed alright, just a bit clueless) and it never happened again. Your situation is more serious and frightening though so I would suggest reporting this.

Good. Don’t feel crappy. The young dickhead male needed consequences for his appalling actions and hopefully will have learned from this. (Sadly probably from what happened to HIM rather than the realisation of what he put you through). You may well have prevented him from going on to do worse to someone else. I’m glad you took action, and that this has had a positive result. You should feel proud. Males need held accountable for their shitty actions rather than them being laughed away with the ‘boys will be boys’ enabling nonsense.

What the fuck is wrong with you?!

Good point, what if it had been a teen on their own.
Such a fright!

Fuck there are some truly twatty replies on this thread 😳

OP that sounds very very frightening. I’m not surprised it’s shook you up. If any man I knew did this I would absolutely call him out on why he thinks it’s entertaining to deliberately frighten someone one this and invade their literal private space. It’s such a shame there hasn’t been a brick shit house of a guy sat inside that open winnow …

Honestly OP, with two sons around that age, whilst I would be absolutely apoplectic with them, as would their father, I actually would be glad that he was getting a really timely reality check, as have his colleagues, that a stupid mistake can cost you.

Stupidity has derailed many a young life and his drinking, showing off and drunken hubris has cost him.

I think he is very very lucky you aren't going futher with this.

The golf club taking it further is proof of how poorly it reflects on them, and how after hours drinking could leave them wide open to a formal complaint from you.

This has been a cheap lesson for him and them.

I’d have pooed my pants. I’ve just told my 16 year old daughter and she was angry for you!