DP not enjoying our “Special time” before the baby arrives.

So when will you be going home ? It could be another 3 weeks before the baby is born. And I doubt you'll want to be on the move home within 24 hours.

Remember the saying about guest are like fish - they go off after 3 days. The same applies to the way the guests feel too.

He's a good man, letting his partner move back to her parental home for upwards of a month ante and post natal. Let him have his whinge

The fact you’ve given it a name, ‘special time’ shows how you’ve built this up into something with expectations.

It’s so intense!

No you are not odd. Why would she want to give birth in her parents home?Surely all her baby stuff is in her own home.
Maybe she wants her Mum around a bit to help which is understandably. But her Mum could stay with her at her OWN home.

Can't think why you want to leave your own home. I don't blame him at all. Surely you can relax in your own home. I can understand why he doesn't like being in someone else's house,even if they are away. I would hate it too.

Are you a bit more emotionally intense than him? Why do you need to soak each other in? Why do you need to have forced fun to be together, could you not have been together at home? It seems a bit forced and fake…

My DH would never agree to this all happening at my parents’ house. It’s nice and safe for you there, but unless is his son-in-law number one in the world, I expect it’s hella stressful for him.
Also my DH would be worried he wouldn’t get a look in at new baby if we were at my parents’ house. Have you actually asked him what he would like / how he would like it all to play out? I suspect he is just going along with your whims here. Not entirely unreasonable as you are the pregnant one about to give birth. But I do think he should be a little considered! X

The thing is that even if your parents' house is lovely and a bit bigger, all his stuff is not there and there isn't the same opportunity to pick up a book, a game, a film, a board game, a magazine, a kindle, do some pending diy, whatever he's into. Whatever he's taken with him to pass the time, it would feel more like when you go on holiday, when you might be stuck with the book you chose to take but now you don't fancy reading that autobiography and preferred some fiction, for example. Being in someone else's house can prevent you from relaxing. You don't know where half of the stuff is, you don't want to be opening all drawers to find what you are looking for, you keep thinking of things you could have brought... I don't know, I think you could imagine yourself relaxing there because it's a familiar house and in your head it's probably a second home (if not directly a childhood home). For him it would be an in-laws home and not somewhere he can unwind, relax and have fun in the same way. Just even sitting on the sofa in someone else's house is different and even if they are not around, I don't kick my shoes, take my socks off, and cuddle in the same way, it feels a bit off-putting. I couldn't relax in the same way in my in-laws house and I would probably miss a hundred things from home that would be too minor to actually go and pick up. I would have stayed home and go out for meals, stay up watching films until late, have friends over, etc. You have turned on nesting mode but there's nothing for him to do in that regard. Better off at home and getting the nursery ready or doing DIY that won't get done later but is needed, going shopping for essentials, spending some quality time in places you won't be able to visit for a while, having dinner parties (when if pot-luck ones, so not much prep), etc.

When she's 39 weeks pregnant?

Why not? (Obviously being bit creative about positions! And assuming she doesn't have any medical problems etc).

A non home birth.

And what you can do is go back to your actual home to await the baby.
Having a home birth at someone else's house, but not by accident. Actually waiting for it.
The mind boggles.

We filled that last week with all the things we wouldn't be able to do for ages when the baby came. What you WILL be doing when it arrives is being stuck in the house looking at each other for weeks/months. Why on earth start that before you have to?
Our first was a week late, so we had three separate 'this is the last meal out we'll get for a while's!

When she's 39 weeks pregnant? 😲

Yeah i wouldn't be happy with that set up at all either if I was your OH.. it might be the perfect place for you to relax, be in your bubble and give birth, but it obviously isn't for him.
He should have spoken up though to be fair

He probably is bored. Tell him to suck it up and watch a box set.

He doesn't need to be told to suck it up - he's clearly already doing that because OP had no idea he wasn't loving this arrangement as much as she was until she chose to open a private conversation on his phone. The partner has been dutifully putting aside his own preferences and prioritizing those of his 39 week-pregnant partner.

OP needs to accept that this likely isn't what he wanted and that's ok - he's a whole separate person and isn't extremely pregnant, so it's expected that he isn't necessarily going to have the same feelings and preferences. He shouldn't have to apologize for that or feel guilty for having feelings that don't fit the dream OP has. There's absolutely no conversation that needs to happen about his boredom unless OP wants to (genuinely) offer to change the plan to suit them both instead of just her. Focus on how his behavior reflects his care and priorities right now instead of trying to control his feelings.

Have you got a source for that? I've never heard of it before. DD was born at 39 +1.

I love that episode!!!!

It's so funny when she's in the woods and she hears some rustling and then makes some kind of irritated comment to Carrie on the phone that she hopes it's not Steve about to jump out the bushes to try and have sex with her again 😂

It's one of my favourite episodes.....and sums up this thread perfectly!!!

Sirely you can just talk to him about the message you saw and explain it’s upset you and why?!

YABU way to OTT go home and just get on with it.

If that's what you want to do then go for it. The average first time baby is born 8 days after EDD so you still have at least 2 weeks. It's great you are creating just the atmosphere you want, and taking control of your birth. It's a very important time for you and it sounds like you have created a cosy environment for a successful home birth. Ignore those on here who don't understand about homebirth and oxytocin in birth.

The only thing I will say is if your husband wants to go out for a bit, to see friends or visit the office, he should go, just to balance your needs. You are enjoying this time but he doesn't have to. It's not a reflection on spending time with you, probably more the environment and being away from home
You would both be doing the things you enjoy whilst it's easy to do. So have you already got everything done in your house that you need to do? Meals prepped etc?

You're nesting. It's a hormonal, prebirth thing. In a couple of months you will look back on this notion of 'special time' and 'soaking it up as a couple' and cringe.

Your DH does not have these hormones making him want to nest and therefore is bored absolutely shitless and probably would rather be anywhere else except wasting his time off at his in laws house, doing nothing. Go easy on him.

Our bodies release these hormones for a reason. Namely to prevent us killing or abandoning our offspring. I could really do with some more tbh Without them, you too would be bored and stir crazy by now.

I would hate this, sorry. I am a very active, out and about type person. However, I do think your partner should have spoken to you or kept his phone messages better out of your sight. I can understand why you feel a bit upset that he is not enjoying things the way you are, but honestly, I would let it go, because he is there for you regardless.

Oh I see, full on bubble.

He works remotely. He’s not even allowed out of the bubble to go to work.

How is he in a little bubble if he’s still at work?

If he has a box set lol. They’re probably at home.