I've never had anyone that i could call my 'rock'. Not my dad. Not my mom. Not my siblings. Not my exh. Friends neither. I knew from a young age that this life was for me to handle on my own. No help came to me in terms of emotional issues (boyfriends/friendship struggles or how to choose a partner) or practical issues (help to move house or childcare) or financial issues (no money as a present ever, no help with deposits, no inheritance).
Im in my 40s now and im finally coming to terms with the fact that the strong independent personality I built, was not out of wanting to be like that, but out of necessity. As a young person you rather build an armour and say you chose it, rather than shrivel away with sadness of knowing that no one has your back. Ever.
I think the only people that really care for me are my ds's. My family members have the emptional depth of a mushroom. Happy to see me at Christmas, birthdays etc, but no interest in me as a person. Some have taken advantage and lied. Exh was the same. Obviously. I didn't know any better. It sucks. I wish i had a helping hand with life every now and then. With the kids, with money, with talking about life. Connection.
Thats all. Do you have a 'rock'?