Calories in vs calories out is just not working !

Building muscle through lifting heavy and eating more will allow you to lose the weight and keep it off.
This is true but it becomes incredibly hard for some women to build muscle as they go into perimenopause. Testosterone levels crash and your body is also trying to force you to increase body fat as a way to get more oestrogen.

Eating under 1000 calories a day is very often not sustainable.

No calorie level that you lose weight at is "sustainable". The whole point of it, is it is a deficit level such that you lose weight. Its a perfectly ok level for a healthy middle aged woman to eat when looking to lose weight.

By Starvation mode I mean if you have a few days of being really restrictive, then maybe a couple of meals that are all the way at the other end of the spectrum or like a mini binge.

that’s not to say this is what you’re doing but you mentioned being inconsistent but it might not be as inconsistent as this. And I don’t mean to offend by saying that. I just know that I wouldn’t have the will power to stick with something so rigidly for months and in the past when I have tried to restrict I ended up doing the binging part for the occasional meal (or day!)

but like I said, really hope you manage to figure it out as you know how much hard work and effort you’ve put in so it must be really annoying to not see the changes you’re expecting.

Op is on WLI.

Have you actually spoken to whoever prescribed them to you Op? Doesn't sound like they're working for you

There is so much disordered thinking and misinformation within this thread, alongside some sensible and reasonable thinking.

Building muscle through lifting heavy and eating more will allow you to lose the weight and keep it off. Eating under 1000 calories a day is very often not sustainable. You mention going back to eating normally, but you have to find a way that allows you to sustainably and slowly lose weight and basically not ever stop.

I may have missed it, but have you been to the GP and had all of your bloods done? Thyroid, liver, iron, vitamin d, b12, folate all of that sort of thing. You will almost certainly have deficiencies unless you are supplementing and that won’t help either

With weight loss injections the guidance is usually if you are losing to go up the doses, so perhaps have a discussion with your prescriber.

I’m 38. My maintenance calories are 2019 - yes I’m tall and fat.
My daily calorie allowance at the moment is 1680, so just over 330cal deficit. I religiously track every single food/drink and my only activity is walking, usually I do between 12-15k steps a day. I eat everything, but just make sure it fits inside my daily calorie allowance, I haven’t excluded any food groups, because that’s just the path to toxic and unhealthy relationship with food and so far I’ve lost 35lbs.

Just my experience with calorie counting because it was literally the only thing that saved me.

According to everything I tried I should have been eating 1300 calories. I never lost a thing until I consistently went under 800 everyday.
Everyone’s different and these diets don’t tend to account for this.

It's scary as you get older, the reality of what your TDEE is, and also it's scary how many hidden calories there are - or calories you ignore.

My TDEE is 1350. Which means I have to drop to around 850 calories a day if I want to lose weight. I never count any exercise calories as they are wildly inaccurate.

I love condiments like mayo but there is a horrific amount of calories in that - I can easily eat 2-3 tbsps with a bowl of chips and that could be 250-300 calories etc. When loosing weight you really do have to think about the milk, oil, dips etc everything.

Also op - ive found as i age exercise does not seem to contribute as effectively to weight loss as it did. It used to be i could keep diet the same, and go running 3-4 times a week and weight would fall off

Now the only thing that makes me lose weight is a significant reduction in what i eat.

Its why mounjaro has taken off. Because it stops you eating and the single big cause stopping most of us losing weight is that as we age, we just can't eat a small enough amount.

Calories in, Calories out works.
So you're obviously miscalculation how many Calories you're consuming or how many you're burning.

Metabolism slows as we age and we need less Calories. Also the amount of people I see "working out" at the gym who arr actually just placidly moving around. Are you at 100% for 300calories and hour burn or are you at 20% so actually burning 50?

Starvation mode doesn't exist.

It is likely overestimating your tdee. How old are you? Honestly as we age we need really little. I am 40 amd no longer lose anything at all unless i limit calories to 1000 a day and eat very few white carbs at all.

If you’re in such a high deficit is it possible that you’re body is going into starvation mode and trying to hang onto anything you eat for as long as possible?

also I don’t believe that all Calories are equal, even if you are counting them. E.g 100calories worth of crisps won’t be as good for you as 100calories worth of veg.

of course everyone is different but the way I’ve been successful the few times I’ve had to shift weight is by not counting calories but ensuring about 3quarters of every meal is fruit/veg (never in blended form) and making sure work outs include strength training to build muscle as muscle burns calories even in resting state.

i hope you find something that works for you though because it’s bloody hard, and extremely frustrating when you start off well then plateau. I wonder if due to being so strict with your calories you’ve been eating the same foods for each meal? If yes I wonder if mixing things up for more variety might get you out of the plateau?

good luck op!

edited to correct typos!

You have hit one of your body’s set points (read up on them).

this is good! You are doing really well and losing the weight slowly which means it is likely to stay off. If you get past this set point (which might take another month of feeling like you are going nowhere) then the good news is that it is hard to get past on the way back up as well. So reframe thinking about it to - this is you cementing all the good work you have done till now and making sure your body won’t go back up beyond this point). You can keep going down and get past this. You will start going down again but it takes time. hang in there!

Once you get to a healthy weight, it is much harder to lose more. It is fairly obvious really. If a 20 stone person sticks to a low calorie diet, they will lose 10 stone fairly steadily. If a 10 stone person sticks to a low calorie diet they won’t lose 10 stone and die, they will lose a bit gradually or maintain their weight.

I understand where you are coming from....its definitely peri menopausal thing too...i agree your TDEE must be on the floor..Something changes and what you did before doesnt work..I have found hot pilates more effective than previous gym classes and doing weights. Its depressing though how hard it is to lose weight !

You've made some great progress OP, read back where you have used positive language here and use that ' I've done really well and I'm still working on it' etc.

But, lots of reasons that aren't you per se - body composition is a factor, your muscle mass could be lower than it was as when you diet suddenly your body just doesn't distinguish that well between fat tissue and muscle tissue. You lose less muscle tissue if you are lifting at the same time, but unfortunately you still lose some, which will impact the TDEE.

This isn't bragging at all but when I was doing it age 42 I was squatting (once I had worked up to it) 60kg, leg pressing up to 200kg, hip thrusting 90kg etc, three times a week. It was hard work in the gym (recommned a good playlist!), I would sometimes have to nap after! But it does work. Have a look if you are on the gram at Fit and Fifty, she is my inspo.

Do you not see (I've been there) that some of your language is contradictory:

"I just want to reach my goals and slowly taper off this stuff." I want to get to my goals and gradually resume normal eating. What is your frustration telling you? Why are you punishing and pushing yourself? Eat more food, don't think of it as a short game now that you are close to the end - at this point you can be tapering off and training for sustaining your diet and energy and fitness (you may be someone who always needs to track a bit), listen to your body's needs.

I'm now 45 , I do seriously need to build back up the gym as I crashed out hard at the end - I was doing a 'cut' with my PT and got down to 22% body fat at 42, but the last few weeks killed me, all the joy had gone. I'm getting more of a handle back now on my diet but am also currently really enjoying eating a lot of carb.

I seem to be doing mentally quite well , compared to people my age when they talk about peri struggles, and I'm sure that's down to me eating more carb, carbs help hormone synthesis (carbs are life my PT used to say 😃).

My new timeframe this time is 2 years of consistency to achieve what I want (just dropping some body fat and back into the rhythm of the gym as love the mental health benefits). September / autumn is always a good time for a gym push so that's what I'm working toward with an aim that by spring next year say end of May I will have done a solid round of it and be back to lifting what I was before. Focus less on weight numbers on the scale and more on weight numbers on the bar and how good you feel and what your body can do, it's incredible.

Not everyone likes the gym! But can probably sustain it with 2 gym sessions in the long run ( or adjustable weights at home).

This, my BMR is only around 1300 cal, I walk and do an exercise class most days (body pump, yoga, dance) and struggle to lose if I eat over 1000cals. I’m 57, unfortunately that’s the reality. I used to run a lot but even that didn’t have a huge impact, it’s far more about what you eat though obviously exercise is good for physical health the impact on weight loss is minimal. Even when I trained for marathons the exercise didn’t make a lot of impact. I’d double check your portion sizes etc and make sure you count the calories in fruit and veg. It’s hard, I know.

Please listen to this podcast with Dr Chatterjee and Dr Stacey Sims. https://open.spotify.com/episode/4eReF91DXty9Ngjk7bS4pr?si=YgLWnSZOSTqVKS1M6N4uNQ Excessive calorie restriction is very damaging for women.

I'm 41, 5ft4 and 8st11. I have a body composition that is much more muscle than fat (around 40% muscle and 20% fat).

I do 8 hours of formal exercise a week in the form of CrossFit, Hyrox and strength training, plus a lot of walking on top.

I don't count calories, but to lose weight (when I occassionally want to lose a lb here or there) I essentially need to eat like a bird! This was not the case in my 20s and 30s.

My weight loss intake will be something like:

• 200g fat free Greek yoghurt with protein powder, blueberries and a tsp of maple syrup
• 2 egg mushroom omlette with asparagus
• 150kcal dark chocolate bar
• little bowl of chicken thigh chilli with bulgur wheat

You will be eating too much, OP.