Help, I’m pregnant and don’t want to be

She has already taken the first medication. You could have RTFT.

I am so pleased he’s being your champion. It sounds like he’s a rare one that fully understands his part in this. You deserve happiness and health. Don’t let anyone bitter inside your head.

You are not alone here. You have to make a decision which is right for you.
At the moment, you are carrying a bunch of cells, not a baby. If you need to end this pregnancy, for any reason, you can! It's your body, your life. You don't have to tell anyone.
Please feel free to PM me, I'm here if you want to chat thorugh it.
Know you're not alone.

Wow. Both her friend and the father seem to be supporting her. Maybe let’s not be so black and white?

This is so much wiser than the patronising nonsense above. Nobody who knows has never used it against me either. Please don’t worry. Naturally there will be some pro-life people in life, but it’s your body, your choice and NOTHING to be ashamed of x

What an absolutely pointless, spiteful and unpleasant response written only because you could not actually respond to the fact that I am quite correct.

Move on.

What an unpleasant and cynical attitude. I had an abortion and confided in a couple of close friends, some work colleagues and my partner (who later became my husband.) Not one person was unsupportive or judgemental and it didn't change any of my relationships for the worst.

Almost 20 years on, no one has tried to use it against me (and I've told many more people about it since then) and frankly, I don't really see how they could. They could post about it on social media for all I care, I've got nothing to be ashamed of.

OP, I wish you all the best. Do what you need to do to get through the next few days but please remember that you've made the right choice for you. Own that decision and as time moves on, you'll feel empowered by it rather than guilty or ashamed.

I just want to set your expectations realistically. You will feel physically vulnerable, and depending on the level of material you need to pass, as much of a physical person as you are, you might want to be alone.

I had my termination at 7 weeks.

I've never had a labour so I can't compare it labour, but even though the main event was over quite quickly, the pains and the sweats were like I'd eating a spicy curry, and had to hold it in because there was a queue for the bathroom, whilst also having an IBS flare up.

It also stimulates the bowels, it can be messy and smelly. You may also have some continual bleeding that seems a bit more than a heavy period.

Whatever you decide to do this weekend just make sure your support person knows to give you space is you need it.

A lot of people have shit friends. A lot of people care whether someone would wish to use an abortion against them. You are quite well aware that some people's attitudes DO change and can become negative, judgemental and preachy. Having an abortion can, does and has changed and ruined relationships.

But you already know all this.

There are absolutely zero upsides to telling people her decision. There are many possible downsides.

And, as I said, she is young. She will learn. And good luck to her.

So that's that.

Not everyone has shit friends. Not every one cares whether someone would wish to use an abortion against them, in what way would an abortion be used against someone anyway.

You have already made a mistake telling your friend. It is an enormous mistake to tell him.

But you won't be told, and are extremely naively thinking people will support you, not be judgemental, that it won't change how they feel about you and that they will never use this against you. You are also very naive thinking it cannot be used against you.

You're young. You'll learn.

So good luck with it all, and I will leave it there.

This. Anything this private that the OP would not be happy to read about on social media should never be shared with anyone, ever. People who seem loyal and loving now can do a 180 in years to come, and can drop you in the shit accidentally too.

I think you should consider confiding in someone. A friend, colleague.

But also if youre sure Id pursue the abortion asap so you dont need a surgical one. You dont have to go to your GP. Any NHS sexual health clinic can help or you can ring BPAS.

Personally if you know your choice, and this isnt an ongoing relationship id probablt not tell the guy. But I dont think theres a right or wrong choice

As someone who has been through a medical abortion, I strongly disagree that she shouldn't tell anyone. I know it's different for different people, but I needed someone with me.

You actually sound incredibly responsible and sensible. If you truly do not want to do this, have a termination. Your body, your choice. Hope it works out for you. X

He sounds like a good guy, hope it all goes as well as it can for you both. Your hormones might make you feel quite emotional, you will probably feel emotional and some sadness anyway.
Be confident in the knowledge that you have made a rational choice for the right reasons for you, no judgement and remember above all try to be kind to yourself. Sending love xx

Oh @HelpIDontKnowWhatToDoNow I feel sad reading your messages and how guilty you feel. Please stop. You have done nothing wrong! Accidents happen, we learn and move on. Stop blaming yourself or thinking you’ve done something wrong.

If it’s any consolation, I was you almost 10 years ago. My family would not agree to abortion, wasn’t in a stable relationship, had a job but not amazing pay and I had a medical termination. I was full of guilt for a while. Almost a decade on, my parents or family (or the dad) still don’t know, I’m in a much better place, settled relationship and tripled my salary. You will get through this and forget x

You’re 26, it’s simple really, you go to your doctor. You don’t tell your parents. Because you’re an adult and you don’t have to.
you may live to feel bad about it in the future you may not.

But if you’re in the uk it’s not difficult? You have rights. You’re not in USA or Poland or Ireland years ago? Just do what you want to do.

Don’t feel bad. This is exactly what abortions are for. Thank God for them and than heavens that we live in a country where they’re available, that we have the NHS to provide them and where no part of the state or church has the power to stop us having one. You have no reason to feel guilty. Go and see your GP, get the ball rolling and carry on living your life.

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I'm glad you've reached a decision and started the process and also chosen to share with this man.

It sounds like he's being supportive.

Take care.