Is it as easy as mindset?

Nailed it

100% nailed it

So for me I do have things like migraines. I'm fortunate enough not to have had cancer.

But the point I'm making is that I can, and do, sometimes give in to feeling ill, wallow, lie in bed, feel sorry for myself. That has literally never made me feel better. If I'm ill I go to bed early, I might nap, I may take the day off. But I try not to just feel sorry for myself, if I'm that ill I try not to just watch TV or eat crap. What I try and do, is whatever it is, sniffles, migraine, chronic pain, try and accept that I'm not at my best and do everything I still can in that situation, even if it's just getting fresh air and going round the block, or enforcing a nap in bed. If I do that I normally feel much better very quickly, the amount of times I've felt like I just want to lie on the sofa and feel sorry for myself and after a 20 minute walk I actually feel fine. Or I think I can't handle a situation but I say I'll try it and see how I go, and then actually I feel fine and enjoy myself.

Saying mindset plays a big part doesn't mean you aren't ever ill, it just means you try not to make it the entire focus of what's going on... At least for me

*Edited to change a nonsensical sentence I typed while speaking to my husband

At a cold. A cold is not something you should be laid up in bed feeling all sorry for yourself about. God, I'd be forever languishing in bed the amount of colds and bugs that come into this house. It's not something that is incapacitating.

Ha ha. "Mindset definitely plays a part, except for this condition that I suffer with!"

😆

Maybe she has a strong immune system and doesn’t get as symptomatic as others. We all saw differences in how covid affected us, I had a sore throat for 3 days, my husband and daughter were floored and needed a week in bed.

Can’t stand these “heroes” though who refuse to acknowledge they need to rest

I went to a strict boarding school. Where we all ate the same things So, a controlled environment.

I got horrific mouth ulcers, other infections, and developed bronchitis when everyone else was just getting colds.

But sure, it was down to my mindset 🙄

To all the "it's mindset" posters on here - where do you draw the line?

Just at something you really sufffer with, like migraines? Funny, that.

Do you draw the line at bacterial infections? Viruses? Cancer??

But that’s being physically weaker, which is not a mindset. Some people are genuinely physically weaker just because they are. A mixture of genetics, availability of healthy food etc while the body is growing, and not suffering any major setbacks. It’s not a mindset it’s luck.

I’ve had a head cold for the last few days and it’s floored me. That said I have ME/CFS and Fibro so I’m probably not a straightforward example. I have spent most of the days sleeping and haven’t been able to function even at my normal level. I’ve had a pounding headache, sore throat, earache, blocked nose and sinus pain. The blocked nose is one of my worst symptoms because it seems to wear me out more when I can’t breathe.

No. Mindset alone will not prevent or cure an illness. It does obviously play a large part in your ability to cope when you're not 100%. Which is not to say you shouldn't rest when you need to...it's all about balance and knowing your limits. If you've got a vague sniffle, going about your normal business isn't going to harm you or prevent you getting better. If you've got a more severe illness, pushing through will likely delay your recovery or sometimes make you worse. Sometimes, however, there isn't a choice. Your reference to women pushing through while men don the dressing gown of doom isn't quite how I see it...women in those situations usually carry on because they have to.

When you have little kids (primary school age), you have to rest when you can as you can’t rest in the evenings. Therefore you might find yourself calling in sick more so that you can rest during the working day and recover.

When your kids are older or grown, or you don’t have any, can “push through” the working day knowing you can rest in the evenings and get an early night!

Absolutely

but no one can know that for sure. Two people could have same mildness or severity of a virus but one manages a lot better than the other.

It needn’t be one OR the other

A quick Google search will tell you that the same virus can effect people differently.

Why is it difficult to comprehend that some people will have same virus with worse symptoms?

Nothing to do with mindset. I don't actually enjoy being ill 😆

but that precisely contradicts your view that it has “nothing to do with mindset”!!!

Does your family generally tend to get sick first @RuttleTuttle

But you don’t know for sure it is the “same virus”

You could have got a more severe variant or something different!

Exactly. Caused by a virus.

DH and DC will be affected mildly, and I will be affected badly by the same virus. And nearly always get a post-viral cough.

Nothing to do with mindset. I don't actually enjoy being ill 😆

Interesting question and reflections.
I have been in bed only when I got pneumonia, bad flu and Covid, and was so weak I couldn't walk. Maybe 4-5 times in my life (I am 50)?
Migraines, colds, viruses don't stop me working and going about my daily tasks (they might get reduced i.e. cancelling social events or sports, but not always).
However, I am a very active, buzzing, productive person and - also- there is no plan B, most daily tasks are on me or on me.

I am torn between thinking I am generally speaking lucky with my health or I have 'that' mindset.

A cold would never put me to bed, to be fair neither did covid of flu type A when I had it last Christmas. I am the type to keep plodding on, so yes I do think you can push through that with mindset and a heavy dose of Lemsip. But a migraine or a sickness bug - no amount of mindset can get you through that.

I do think mindset plays a massive part in it. I have young kids so ill a lot, I get migraines and I have chronic pain which has meant I'm in daily pain for 4 years and I can't take painkillers for it, still moving slowly through the NHS waitlists...

Don't get me wrong, I sometimes feel miserable and let myself have a day when I sit about and eat chocolate, but I never feel better for it.

But generally if I accept that I feel rubbish/ have pain and think about how I can keep going despite that I have a much better time as I'll get distracted from feeling rubbish rather than wallowing in it. I might end the day going to bed super early or feeling exhausted but I mentally feel a lot better and able to take on more the next day than if I've had a wallowing day

OP your friend who always struggles through illness with a positive mindset may one day be struck down with a bad dose of flu which renders her unable to leave her bed for a few days. In which case she will explain that this was the worst illness ever and despite her incredibly high pain threshold she was, this time, entirely justified in being bedridden.

It is impossible to point out to such people that people experience illnesses to differing degrees and some people at some times suffer more with illness than others. As well as possibly some people being less mentally resilient. People can be very invested in the concept of their own superiority.

Is this a close friend? Someone who is supportive?
or more of a friend you see irregularly for the odd catch up?

A mild cold
🤷‍♀️