To wonder how people are coping?

And since when was council tax based on the size of your house?

Higher salaries only come with higher outgoings due to lifestyle creep and keeping up with the Joneses. A lot of wealthy people act like they’re being forced into this lifestyle.

@limescale you are missing the context of my posts with another poster. My first post said I didn't understand how Disney + was unaffordable, that's the problem with jumping into a conversation...

How? Our income is similar to the op's and we have a very small mortgage but sending both kids to private school (9 grand a term so 54k a year of post tax income) isn't on the table. It might be if we never went on holiday and pulled them out of every extra curricular activity but I really don't see any way to have a decent lifestyle and pay for private school on that income?

“Higher salaries often come with higher outgoings. I know that we pay a fortune on mortgage, council tax, insurance"

I've no idea who said this as I am quoting a quote but to me this sums up the thread. People GENUINELY believe they should be pitied because they have bought expensive things, with their big salaries, and now have to maintain them. Or even feel that they are entitled to more things, and need more things on top of the things, so how the fuck can they be expected to manage?

I work for a charity for marginalised and vulnerable families, ex-offenders, street homeless etc and one of our staff declared without a hint of irony that she felt terribly sorry for her son (solicitor) as he had a big house and needed a new car, but it was ok for me as I didn't have much in the first place. I read somewhere they call it "money dysmorphia" - where comfortably off people have lost the ability to think rationally about how much they have.

I am retired, mortgage-free and live on about an eighth of the OP's income and still manage to pay for Disney plus. I am worried about the relentless price rises but £4.99 for Disney plus is neither here nor there in the scheme of things when I see what a basic shop comes in at. Also I can only rarely afford to go out so I really like being able to watch films, ect at home as a cinema ticket plus travel to town and some basic refreshments come in at around £25-£30 so £4.99 seems like a bargain

Our combined income is about 1/3 yours. Just got back from 1 week holiday in Spain and that really highlighted to me how expensive food is here in comparison. Currently reigning it right back in. Resolutions include Waitrose only once a month, shop more at Lidls, more vegetarian dishes, organic chicken once a week. Take packed lunch to work. 2 boys at home, eldest has casual
work and I’m asking him to pay for his statutory daily chicken out of his income.

@Statsquestion1 I'm surprised you can pay all your bills and expenses out of 2k ish

That’s a very large salary I could only dream of. My partner earns 42k and I have to stay at home with the children because we would be worse off with me working.

im guessing firstly because you have a large income you probably have larger long term commitment costs. Like a big mortgage? I’m assuming your home may be a reasonable size too so your bills will probably be higher than many other people’s?

we have Amazon prime and Netflix but that’s about it. We have to budget and meal plan and there’s little room for luxuries. We get most of our clothes from Vinted, shein primark ect. Occasional treats must be saved up for. Neither of us drive either at the moment so that’s another cost we don’t have to worry about. That’s another thing, do you have an expensive car?

Ok. I am not young. Tell me what I’m missing that someone on 170k can’t afford Disney +?

If you could provide the following, you would probably get more helpful answers rather than loads of people saying - I get 10% of your household income and I live like a queen!

*Which area of the country do you live in? Town would be helpful.
*Where do you work?
*Mortgage payments - how much were you paying? How much are they now?
*How big is your house? Detached? Terrace?
*School fees - how much were they per term? Primary or Secondary?
*How many DC do you have and their ages?

Loads of people are pulling in expenditure at the moment, I suspect what you have saved in school fees have been swallowed up by increased mortgage payments and inflation so as a result you don't feel better off.

Yes I have 2. Past the childcare stage. Just a small amount for afterschool fees but it’s not a lot.

we are mumsnet rich -

cringe, right there.

@Onemorepenny I'm at the age where I want to feel more comfortable & not budget so much. God knows what council tax & utilities will increase to, that definitely puts me off.

I agree with this - the average 5 year fix in 2019 was 2.5% its now pretty well double that. If OP had calculated that they could afford say £3k pcm in mortgage payments in 2019 then she'd be looking at 5.5 now - that would leave £3,500 ish to cover everything else - so no way to pay those private fees. I'm going to assume OP is in London - the cheapest 4 bed house in my not that nice part of south London is just under £1.5 million which OP would struggle to afford at current interest rates without a big deposit.

Chances are one of the earners is in the £100-125K bracket with a marginal tax rate of 60% as well.

Having said that they are still far better off than many - just not as well off as they expected to be when they first bought their house and put their children in to private school.

Wow OP we have about £110k household income and feel very well off tbh, we save about 1k per month, go on two holidays a year and although our DC don’t go to private school they both have very expensive hobbies. We do live in a cheap area right enough and are very frugal in other ways (I grew up dirt poor and some habits are just ingrained).

It’s all down to housing costs I would imagine. If you bought in the last 10 years or privately rent it will be difficult in comparison to someone earning much less with mortgage paid off or housing association rent.

This. I will never understand the lack of financial literacy in the wealthy. You can literally pay people to teach you effective money management skills. I used to work with hospital consultants and it was terrifying how many of them actually lived paycheck to paycheck (they would genuinely argue over extra clinics). They had the big houses and the fancy cars but everything was financed up to the hilt-it’s terrifying.

I'm most annoyed that all the supermarkets have started selling it vacuum packed. It's horrible.

I put bach mince the other day, it's ridiculous.

This is what pisses me off the most

I wasn’t giving, or not giving sympathy. Just observing that private school is also beyond our means.

We've had this conversation so many times as well. Similar price point range 900k-1.5m
Can't justify the massive mortgage, just not worth it for the very little upgrade it brings.
We could totally afford it, but brings no joy, and the running costs at this point means it isn't even that great a proposition.

Well I suppose it depends if you have young kids or not who need childcare :)
Probably lifestyle means their spend has been very high - they've recognised this and are taking steps to address it.

I'd live like a multi millionaire on half your combined income - but my housing costs are low - small 2 bed bungalow almost paid off, low CT.
I guess you have a large house with an equally large mortgage in an expensive area ?

Since the kids are at school childcare shouldn’t be a huge expense