Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What the in the entire F are they doing with it?!

34 replies

Lex345 · 17/09/2025 20:40

Toilet roll.

I don't buy-excuse the pun-shit toilet roll. I buy the decent stuff, that's rolled out and on by puppies, or bounced on by Koalas, or chased around by kittens, or some other cutesy advertising rubbish that "justifies" the price.

THREE FUCKING ROLLS OF IT IN ONE DAY!!! And of course, NO ONE else could possibly think to change it when it is empty...nooooo, we will leave the saddest looking shred of macerated tissue perilously dangling off the barren brown roll until Mum does it.

WHAT ARE THEY DOING WITH IT?!?

Writing poetry? Origami? Making some kind of elaborate early Hallowe'en costume?

Are they selling it on the black market?!

Light hearted thread. Ish.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Ratafia · 17/09/2025 23:27

Start getting more heavy duty loo paper. I rate Asda's own brand, I think it's called Shades. It's still soft, but it doesn't seem as think as the puppy stuff, so with any luck they'll take less.

Also tell them that in future you will be taking one third each of what you spend on loo paper and shampoo off their respective allowances as they use so much. It might make them think a bit if they have to pay for it.

sesquipedalian · 17/09/2025 23:11

OP, some people just use more than others. My husband has named loo paper ‘DD-roll’ because one of them uses it at such a prodigious rate. And I’m with you over the last poor mangled wizened sheet stuck to the cardboard that no-one can possibly change! And I did find a whole wrinkled roll in the bathroom bin where someone had evidently dropped it into the loo. So it’s not just your house, OP - up and down the country, teenagers and young adults are doing their bit to keep Kimberley-Clark in business.

hadjustaboutenough · 17/09/2025 23:00

That's just shockingly wasteful. I'd stop buying the nice stuff for them. Put out a stock of a cheaper type, then just bring the good one out of hiding when you need it. Stop refilling for them, as a PP suggested. They can do it themselves, from the supply of cheap roll.

InterestedDad37 · 17/09/2025 22:57

Is it national spicy food week?
Don't teenage boys use socks any more?

OutingHobbyWife · 17/09/2025 22:50

Three full rolls gone in a day? Is someone eating it?!

maudelovesharold · 17/09/2025 22:41

On a side note, I made a huge decorative pyramid on the cistern out of all the cardboard inners that no-one else in the house seems to know what to do with. I thought someone would take the hint, but no…So I had to resort to reconstructing it on the closed lid, at which point someone (looking at you, dh!) actually did transfer it to the recycling!

Original poster
Lex345 · 17/09/2025 22:28

Shit goblins 🤣🤣🤣🤣

OP posts:
Silvers11 · 17/09/2025 22:26

randomchap · 17/09/2025 20:54

Do you have teenage boys?

It's not just teenage boys. My Daughter used to go through rolls and rolls of the stuff.

YourSnugHazelTraybake · 17/09/2025 22:26

over50andfab · 17/09/2025 22:13

From experience girls can be just as bad

Show quote history

I'm absolutely certain that teenage girls would not be using it for the same ( not toilet based) purposes as teenage boys !!

randomchap · 17/09/2025 22:25

over50andfab · 17/09/2025 22:13

From experience girls can be just as bad

Show quote history

I don't think you quite understood

MrsMoastyToasty · 17/09/2025 22:21

Squash the toilet roll so that it doesn't actually roll on the holder.

over50andfab · 17/09/2025 22:13

randomchap · 17/09/2025 20:54

Do you have teenage boys?

From experience girls can be just as bad

GarlicPint · 17/09/2025 22:10

alpenguin · 17/09/2025 21:59

I sat on the loo this morning for a pee having just replaced the roll last night before bed, and discovered that sad single sheet stuck to the cardboard and contemplated making this post myself.

I know my partner does a roll on a day on his own but i was awake most of last night so who the hell got to the new roll before I got up? Only one teen in the house (a girl) and a toilet averse primary school kid (boy)… they’re never awake before me.

i think shit goblins eat it in the night

Ohhhhh ... SHIT GOBLINS! I've been sporadically whattafucking at the unexpected scratchiness of my previously cushy bog roll, while surmising they must be putting fewer sheets on the demonstrably wider inner tube. Sneaky, bum-hating bastards, they are. Yes, them! And now I know who they are 😂

They are ... 💩👺🧻

the shit goblins

Kurokurosuke · 17/09/2025 22:00

BasilParsley · 17/09/2025 20:55

This ...

Show quote history

Came (hehe) to ask the same question!

alpenguin · 17/09/2025 21:59

I sat on the loo this morning for a pee having just replaced the roll last night before bed, and discovered that sad single sheet stuck to the cardboard and contemplated making this post myself.

I know my partner does a roll on a day on his own but i was awake most of last night so who the hell got to the new roll before I got up? Only one teen in the house (a girl) and a toilet averse primary school kid (boy)… they’re never awake before me.

i think shit goblins eat it in the night

BeMellowAquaSquid · 17/09/2025 21:58

Remember in lock down when everyone bought it all and the pasta. I blame those people.

Ohwhatfuckeryitistoride · 17/09/2025 21:58

Get the "reusable" loo roll, that'll fettle em.

Motomum23 · 17/09/2025 21:53

Same issue in my house - I put on a new roll in the morning because presumably one of the teens has used it up late at night and then by lunch time it's gone again! Although I find nicky toilet roll (from asda) lasts longer than animal advertised products (and its cheaper - although at £5ish for 9 rolls I'm starting to think investing in a fancy bidet toilet seat would be a great idea!)

usedtobeprettybutImalrightnow · 17/09/2025 21:51

I knew this was going to be toilet roll before I opened it 😂

BigOldBlobsy · 17/09/2025 21:47

Wasn’t there someone posting the other day stating that their teens/pre teens were doing nonsense tik tok stuff with toilet paper - like dropping it in on purpose for it to go all wet and wrinkled ?
i cant quite remember the details but remember thinking what the hell

Original poster
Lex345 · 17/09/2025 21:30

notmycatagain · 17/09/2025 21:23

So what you need to do is take your own roll with you to the toilet. Then whoever ‘they’ are will have to deal with getting new rolls themselves when the last one runs out.
Also, only ever buy it in the weekly shop. If it runs out, ‘they’ will have to go to the shop and buy more.
(You will have your own secret stash, of course).

Ashamedly, I actually already do this with shampoo; because if I don't, I get none at all. It is astonishing how much they use and I half expect them to foam in the rain because it is surely impossible to rinse that amount out properly in one go.

I refuse to make clandestine midnight dashes across the landing with toilet roll!!
I will 100% forget until I am already in there!

OP posts:
notmycatagain · 17/09/2025 21:23

So what you need to do is take your own roll with you to the toilet. Then whoever ‘they’ are will have to deal with getting new rolls themselves when the last one runs out.
Also, only ever buy it in the weekly shop. If it runs out, ‘they’ will have to go to the shop and buy more.
(You will have your own secret stash, of course).

Original poster
Lex345 · 17/09/2025 21:23

There are two of them, full time school and full time college, so this travesty has happened in the hour before school, and the 5 hours since they got home.

The eldest has been out all day at work, so although he does have form for lavishing shampoo all over the bathroom sink, and presumedly eating ketchup with his breakfast cereal, I have to concede it is not him this time.

OP posts:
KingOfPoundbury · 17/09/2025 21:12

Some of you may have heard that I have someone to put toothpaste on my toothbrush, well I also have someone to gently apply toilet tissue.
I have instructed them, in future, to use no more than THREE sheets* *per 'swipe as my gesture to saving the planet.

Nopenousername · 17/09/2025 21:02

I don’t want to derail the thread but can we please talk about puppies working conditions? Are they being compensated fairly with treats and ear scratches? Is the workplace free of vacuums and cats?