Day of Dad’s funeral; Council demand Mum sell her house day after

Sometimes they don’t always follow the books or what seems to be the books. This happened to me in the past, dad & I shared a home but it was his house. He had £0 savings and I cared for him for 20 years without help and worked mon-fri. Three months in a care home and they told me I need to move out and sell his house because despite no savings it’s still considered equity. She said the only reason I can stay is if I’m disabled ( suddenly my type 1 diabetes was no longer considered) neither was my one year old complex DS on oxygen/ feeding pump.

What act? The Duty of Care 2017? Are you sure?

I have looked it up and you are right in that there have been changes in the original 2014 Act in 2022 and now under review in 2025. It doesn't escape the fact that the SS cannot just demand she sells up and goes into care in the way they are doing it. I have copied the following from the Government website on caring for the elderly:

This chapter provides guidance on section 1 of the Care Act 2014 and covers:

• definition of wellbeing
• promoting wellbeing
• wellbeing throughout the Care Act

That is shocking. They are supposed to have a duty of care to ensure that nothing happens to disrupt family life.

How did it turn out for you?

Sometimes they don’t always follow the books or what seems to be the books. This happened to me in the past, dad & I shared a home but it was his house. He had £0 savings and I cared for him for 20 years without help and worked mon-fri. Three months in a care home and they told me I need to move out and sell his house because despite no savings it’s still considered equity. She said the only reason I can stay is if I’m disabled ( suddenly my type 1 diabetes was no longer considered) neither was my one year old complex DS on oxygen/ feeding pump.

This act does not exist in law in England and Wales.

This act does not exist in law in England and Wales.

SS have to do things by the book but it is incredibly insensitive to force the house sale so soon. Can a deferred payment be put in place? Has DM got over £23,250 in savings? Is DM claiming Attendance Allowance and council tax benefit?
I’m genuinely so sorry for the loss of your father and how distressing this is for you and DM. I wish SS would be more helpful and human for you. Here if you need support.

They might be using the Duty of Care Act of 2017. Resist it. Get legal advice. I do not think they have a right to force your mum to leave the house, and sell it over her and keep the money if she has relatives.

YOU MUST NOT LET THEM TAKE THE HOUSE before you consult the legal people. Which? legal might help, or you can find someone who subscribes to it. They try it on. As I have often posted, they jump on anyone who is unlikely to be a drain on their budget. There must be tens of thousands of elderly people without assets who are ignored by social workers. They are they who are quoted when the authorities say there is no care in the community. Workers are too willing to save their budget by jumping on those house owners.

Do NOT let them put your mother in a residential home without you visiting it. When you do, look at the staff ratio. How many staff at lunch time? How many residents sitting all day in a lounge overseen by one care assistant?

Residential homes cost a lot of money, and as your mother's property is worth so much, the cost will probably be somewhere in the region of £2-3,000 a week. If it is a council run home, chances are it will be more, because the cost is often shared between residents, and those who have money pay for those who do not. If it is not LA run, you will fare no better, because they too may have a sliding scale of fees. Residential homes charge for NHS and private medical treatment. They factor in the cost of extra nursing, mileage and accompanying assistant for every trip outside, for clinic appointments. Your mother could end up paying for private health because she has the money. It works similarly with other private institutions, like private schools.

Ask if the residents get at least one hour of one to one time with an assistant every day. If they do not, it is better for her to be at home and pay someone for care by the hour. If you can possibly care for your mother with the help of other relatives, then that is so much better. In the present climate of lack of funds, they will take the money fast, racking up expenses you never thought of.

Did your father have life assurance? If he did, why would they want the house?

WRITE TO YOUR MP and explain the time factor. I cannot think that he/she will not be as horrified as I am.

Buried Dad Tuesday.

Mum, 88, Parkinson’s, lost her DH of 60
years. She’s shaking with terror today.

I had hoped Social Services would give Mum 24 hours after her husband’s funeral before calling and demanding she sell her house and be moved to a care home asap, house money to be controlled by council, but it was not to be.

SS want permission from her DC (me and DB) to move her asap - we’ve got a month left of private carers. Mum & Dad have spent £650k of their and our money on care. DM is horribly, painfully disabled and needs 24hr care. There’s £0 left.

I told the social worker before funeral that we wanted DM at home for a while before any more major life changes, in case the shock kills her.

SS know Dad died. They know his will is wrongly written and we can’t do equity release as a result.

SS know we can’t pay for more private care, and that they’ll have to fork out for a couple of months respite care with round the clock carers if she at home.

But they rang DB the morning after the funeral to say they wouldn’t provide any care beyond a toilet break once every eight hours.

DM ran a charity for our part of London for 40 years. She worked tirelessly for locals and newcomers alike for a tiny salary. As net contributors to society go, she’s right up
there.

We all know councils lick their lips at the prospect of getting the cash from a London house.

But AIBU - are these social workers being cruel, greedy and dangerous?

Buried Dad Tuesday.

Mum, 88, Parkinson’s, lost her DH of 60
years. She’s shaking with terror today.

I had hoped Social Services would give Mum 24 hours after her husband’s funeral before calling and demanding she sell her house and be moved to a care home asap, house money to be controlled by council, but it was not to be.

SS want permission from her DC (me and DB) to move her asap - we’ve got a month left of private carers. Mum & Dad have spent £650k of their and our money on care. DM is horribly, painfully disabled and needs 24hr care. There’s £0 left.

I told the social worker before funeral that we wanted DM at home for a while before any more major life changes, in case the shock kills her.

SS know Dad died. They know his will is wrongly written and we can’t do equity release as a result.

SS know we can’t pay for more private care, and that they’ll have to fork out for a couple of months respite care with round the clock carers if she at home.

But they rang DB the morning after the funeral to say they wouldn’t provide any care beyond a toilet break once every eight hours.

DM ran a charity for our part of London for 40 years. She worked tirelessly for locals and newcomers alike for a tiny salary. As net contributors to society go, she’s right up
there.

We all know councils lick their lips at the prospect of getting the cash from a London house.

But AIBU - are these social workers being cruel, greedy and dangerous?

No. 😁

S117 aftercare is in place once a person is discharged from a section 3 and remains in place as long as there is a need relating to the reason they were detained. S117 aftercare doesn't just include social care services, though.

OP you need to get independent advice, age UK are a good place to start. Some solicitors offer one off free consultations if you haven't already got one involved.

The problem is that the free care is only provided for as long as the section order is in place, and it’s reviewed every 28 days, so funding would be withdrawn as soon as the circumstances which required the section are resolved.

And people are advising OP to ask for an assessment for NHS continuing health care based on the fact that her mum needs 24 hour care. The amount of care needed is irrelevant, it’s the type of care that’s important. The person has to be assessed as needing nursing care, not just social care and eligibility is based on the complexity and unpredictability of the needs, not the diagnosis itself. It’s incredibly difficult to qualify and eligibility is reviewed three months after the award is made, then every year after that. Funding can be withdrawn at any time after review if the circumstances change, so initial eligibility doesn’t guarantee ongoing funding. If CHC is denied, the NHS may make a contribution towards nursing costs if the person is eligible.

The problem is that the free care is only provided for as long as the section order is in place, and it’s reviewed every 28 days, so funding would be withdrawn as soon as the circumstances which required the section are resolved.

And people are advising OP to ask for an assessment for NHS continuing health care based on the fact that her mum needs 24 hour care. The amount of care needed is irrelevant, it’s the type of care that’s important. The person has to be assessed as needing nursing care, not just social care and eligibility is based on the complexity and unpredictability of the needs, not the diagnosis itself. It’s incredibly difficult to qualify and eligibility is reviewed three months after the award is made, then every year after that. Funding can be withdrawn at any time after review if the circumstances change, so initial eligibility doesn’t guarantee ongoing funding. If CHC is denied, the NHS may make a contribution towards nursing costs if the person is eligible.

My mum was hounded... Disgusting!
People like you just spout rhetoric!

Reported for troll hunting

Reported for troll hunting