Hubby wants to do a 6 week holiday alone

@PiratecatcherI knew it was going to be the Camino when I saw 6 weeks 🤣
(I did it).
Let him go OP. Let him have this. It can be life changing. You could meet him in Santiago for a few days at the end, or arrange a meeting point along the way, then the absence won’t be so long.
And do something of your own during that time - make the most of it.

The only responses she was going to be able to relate to are the ones saying "Yeah, he's selfish, you should stop him going".

Most people have said that he should seize the opportunity.
You'd have a point if a lot of people on their 30s with young children had piled on and started saying how selfish he was because they were only looking at it from their perspective. But people haven't done that.
Younger people are perfectly capable of weighing up the situation and coming to the conclusion that while it would be selfish to wander off for 6 weeks with small children at home, it isn't selfish and it's a great opportunity in retirement when someone has presumably dedicated their life so far to their family and working etc.

Men can meet women anywhere if they want to. Doesn't justify being coupled up all the time.

Slight word of warning here. A close friend's already X husband (deserted her and their two young children) did this. He met yet another woman and left his SECOND wife for her. It didn't last, but he wasn't the only one in his group of male Camino walkers who left their marriages after meeting someone on the Pilgrimage.

You've been with your hubby about the same time as I've been with my partner 7 years ish. He wants to do everything together and quite often forgets I have teens and one child under 10, I feel smothered sometimes. A friend asked if I wanted to go to Prague this December as it was her winter dream and she knows I want to go back there one day. He was all sad faced but didn't complain.

I ended up giving in and adding him because I couldn't stand the sad puppy dog eyes anymore but I just wanted to be with my old high school friend I've not seen in the flesh for 15 years and she's almost died twice this last 2 years. So I was the sad one afterwards.
She ended up breaking her leg anyway so this winter is off the table but I hope to go maybe next year.

I'm mostly wheelchair bound and can use crutches short distances so it's not like I'd be galavanting around getting pissed, I just wanna go see that beautiful city again with my dear friend while I still have enough mobility to use crutches and not completely confined to a wheelchair.
She's also the same gender as me so it's not like I'm going on holiday with some random dude either. I have a 360° camera and a camera for taking spatial photos and videos, also live stream available for both so it's not like he couldn't call me and me give him a virtual tour of where I am and the sight seeing I would be doing. She also takes millions of holiday photos wherever she goes so there probably wouldn't be a moment he couldn't see.

Maybe look at hubby taking a 180 or 360 cam with him to clip onto his hiking gear to share the experience with you as often as he could? Might be something he would enjoy being able to do too since if you can't join him physically you can still kind of share it that way.
(My spatial camera eats battery but the 360 camera doesn't so much so if you do then research which is best for quality and battery life)

I agree, but I was just pointing out that the OP might have got responses that she felt she could relate to more from somewhere where the posters were more in the older demographic.

Ahh that makes more sense that you’re upset.
i agree it’s too long but i began to see the other side when i read the comments but you’ve not been together for a very long time so 6 weeks does seem a big ask.
its a shame you don’t have a shared travel interest as you were so much older when you got together, I too wouldn’t expect to be parted for so long

I think the vast majority of answers have been about seizing every opportunity, this thread has had almost unanimous support for the DH to do the walk.

I think this is possibly a question that would be better answered on Gransnet or somewhere where the demographic is made up of people who are at a similar life stage. Of course if you are in the trenches with three under eights and struggling with bedtime every night you might find it hard to comprehend your partner going away for six weeks. Likewise if you've just married, being apart for six weeks might seem unthinkable. But asking people who've got into their sixties about seizing every opportunity that life gives you while you are still physically able might give a more balanced answer.

YABU, OP. Six weeks isn't long at all - if he'd said six months, you might have a point. Assuming you're both in your 60s, you're old enough to have developed the personal resources to spend time alone. The Camino is a lovely thing for him to do, and it needs to happen while he is still fit enough. Please give him your support - and maybe plan a fun trip of your own while he's away.

I’ve seen a lot of people say that while they may have done it in a group/couple they often walked alone and only met at the end of the day

If I was doing this there is NO WAYi would want my dp muscling in to “share something of the experience”…..

My husband ran the Camino over 3 weeks (he had a sabbatical from work) 7 years later on a second sabbatical he walked the Via Frantigena. For the fourth week of this I was able to join him in Rome. He had the most amazing experiences on each and we had lots of FaceTime calls and photos. I would not have enjoyed 20km daily walks and dorm sleeping! Consider meeting up with him at certain points for a couple of nights so you can share something of the experience.

Yep-she can muscle in. Or she can just let him go. I know what I’d do. And safety? It’s the Camino, he’s not climbing Everest solo!

I wouldn't have an issue with this. It's something he wants to do and 6 weeks isn't a lifetime.

He's blessed with good enough health that he can do this at 69 years of age. Don't stand in his way on this.

Isn’t there a saying - if you love someone,set them free??
I’d want to know about safety (too many news stories about missing solo hikers) - but 6 weeks is not very long in reality. Maybe you could go at the beginning and have a day or two together before he sets off? Maybe meet again at the end - although I’ve no idea how feasible that is as he may not know to the day when he will finish.
If he’s retired anyway then it doesn’t mean he’s using up a holiday allowance so there’s no limit on going away with you at another time.

Well to be fair, if the OP does not understand the need for challenge, to meet a long held goal or a lifelong dream, such as walking the Camino is, and the fire that doubtless burns in her DH’s soul to do this, they are probably not suited as a couple.

And maybe if she does not support him he will do it anyway, and keep on walking. But that doesn’t seem to be what he wants.

If you were willing to go and he wanted to do it alone then I could see your point more. But as it’s something you won’t do with him, you are essentially saying that he can never do it . If he doesn’t go he will probably understandably resent you, so for the sake of his happiness and your relationship, wave him off with a smile.

@T1Dmama

It sounds like he would be fine with her going away to pursue her interests. It’s OP that wouldn’t want to…

@Laurmolonlabe

well, it could happen! It’s a big interesting world out there and no one likes to feel controlled and restricted by their partner. If Op doesn’t get her head in gear around this then she could find herself alone for a lot longer than just six weeks…

This is just super weird! “Nobody would be happy with a partner buggering off for 6 weeks. Oh, but it would be fine if the other partner could bugger off for 6 weeks too.” It seems as if it’s a confused mix of jealousy and neediness. Different, of course, if there are children or other responsibilities, or it will take all the available family money, but there doesn’t seem to be any suggestion of that.

Yes very much this. It’s hardly like he is jaunting off to Thailand to sample the local pleasures.

DH did Kilimanjaro a couple of years ago with a friend and was away for 2 weeks ( they did some other mountain - Miro(?) - to acclimatise). The timing was inconvenient as DS still young and we have rookiedog who was entirely DHs idea and required a lot of walking and attention, tricky when I was working. But hiking is something that gives DH pleasure and he wanted to do it for his 50th, so I gritted my teeth and waved him off with a smile. Did annoy me a bit when people said I should be proud of him for his efforts when I felt it was probably harder to juggle everything for a fortnight, but hey ho.

Maybe it’s because we have been married for so long, but I would be delighted if DH now announced he wanted to do a 6 week hiking trek .
I ski every year without him - he tried it a few times but it’s not for him - and go on ladies trips so it’s not one sided. We would probably do more holidays together if we didn’t have rookiedog, but again that was 100% his choice at the time.

@Piratecatcher

Please don’t guilt him into not going.

You believe that if it gives you comfort.