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Original poster

To be fed up with work colleague!

32 replies

Crimble123 · 16/09/2025 15:07

Im finding it almost insufferable working with her. We have the same role but she thinks she's my boss when she isnt.
Im not the loudest person but will hold my own in meetings etc. I don't feel like I need to talk over others and make it about myself.
However work colleague is so loud! Often talks over others including me, makes it about herself. The other day a new person came in to meet us. Colleague made it all about her and she would do this and that and come to her for this and that. Not "we" meaning me and her.
So I did cut in and said oh btw im Crimble I do the same job as colleague and this is my other colleague1 who does a different role.
Other senior staff are asking colleague to hold meetings that I also should be apart of as I have information to add that is valuable but because is loud and all about contacting her for this and that people go straight to her.
Ive already approached our boss once to discuss issues but this basically got batted away. I got the sense from boss and other colleague they are worried about rocking the boat as other colleague1 has mentioned about walking on eggshells and worried about saying something as they know other colleague will get in a mood!
I just don't know what to do. I feel undermined most of the time, Im made to feel like a junior member when im not and my boss has once already batted off me asking to speak to her about these issues.
Im feeling so angry and frustrated

OP posts:
BauhausOfEliott · 16/09/2025 16:17

Swiftie1878 · 16/09/2025 15:23

Sounds like you just have different personalities, and that she is more proactive and energetic than you. That’s not to say she’s ‘better’ - just different.
Are you a little jealous of her and the attention she receives?

That's not the impression I get from the OP's post at all.

'Proactive and energetic' isn't at all the same thing as what the OP's describing. The OP's colleague sounds like someone who lacks professional courtesy and doesn't have the knowledge/aptitude to justify her confidence. Talking over people is just rude.

SecretNameAsImShy · 16/09/2025 16:16

If she wants people to go to her for this and that, then let them. Surely it means you have an easier life at work. If she tries to pass the work to you, then push back and say, no, you offered your services, not mine!

Friendlygingercat · 16/09/2025 15:50

Like your colleague I have a "forceful way" about me that does not always go down well. I can remember in a staff development course we were divided into teams and asked to select a chair. I was voted in as chair (I had considerable committee experience). As part of my role I made sure that everyone had their say and that when one particular colleague spoke across or cut off the quieter members I would say something like "Excuse me John but Mary was speaking so can you please allow her to finish?" That did not go down well with the facilitator who accused me of being overbearing. When I said I was going to make a complaint and two other members backed me he quickly apologised. Men in particular do not like powerful women.

IPM · 16/09/2025 15:33

I agree with @Swiftie1878 OP.

Different personalities by the sound of it.

Annoying but nothing you can do to change her.

All you can do is change the way you are at work if you want to.

Swiftie1878 · 16/09/2025 15:23

Sounds like you just have different personalities, and that she is more proactive and energetic than you. That’s not to say she’s ‘better’ - just different.
Are you a little jealous of her and the attention she receives?

Original poster
Crimble123 · 16/09/2025 15:17

IPM · 16/09/2025 15:13

Other senior staff are asking colleague to hold meetings that I also should be apart of as I have information to add that is valuable but because is loud and all about contacting her for this and that people go straight to her.

She has a strong and forceful way about her which is likely to get her promoted.

Refreshing when you consider how many men are like this and make it up the ladder.

I can see why you find it annoying but just keep holding your own.

We cant get promoted in this role.

She has been here a couple of years more than me so i get she knows the staff better but its like whoever shouts the loudest gets heard even if what they are saying isnt always correct. So frustrating

OP posts:
IPM · 16/09/2025 15:13

Other senior staff are asking colleague to hold meetings that I also should be apart of as I have information to add that is valuable but because is loud and all about contacting her for this and that people go straight to her.

She has a strong and forceful way about her which is likely to get her promoted.

Refreshing when you consider how many men are like this and make it up the ladder.

I can see why you find it annoying but just keep holding your own.