Private school grief

Some may be but the number going to independent is only 7% so that doesn't account for the %.
25% of state children = 2.25 million children. There are only 550K children in independent schools.
Many state parents use tutors to make up for lack of subject teachers in GCSE years etc.

So, if 25% of primary school students are tutored but less than 5% go on to attend selective state grammar schools, are the rest not likely to be being tutored to pass private school entrance exams? Meaning the 25% of tutored children and those in private education overlap and this isn't a sign of a load of "state school parents" choosing to tutor instead of go private?

MN is a very rarefied middle class world.

30% get tutored? That’s higher than I assumed. I know our local senior school has a high number of pupils using tutors, but that’s to compensate for subject teacher shortage.

It is a strategy widely suggested on MN ie state "plus" which = tutoring.

No, of all children in education. Research carried out by Sutton Trust

Well actually 41% of children in London are tutored at secondary
NE it is around 16%

And 75% don’t.

25% of what children? Successful applicants to grammar schools? Is 75% not "many"?

Over 25% of children get tutored......
That rises to 30% at secondary age

Because for some people it is Schrodinger' education: independent schools simultaneously confer privilege and advantage whilst at same time not being as good as state schools.

It's complete mental gymnastics to attack choice and individualism, everyone should just fit into neat little boxes provides by the state.

Not necessarily. Grammars don’t exist in most parts of the country and many children do perfectly well without tutoring. As my mum once said “You can’t buy brains.”

No they wouldn’t. There are many people who could afford private education and don’t believe in buying privilege.

@blossomtoes most posters on here say state education is better than private so why is it buying privilege?

That’s oversimplistic.

There are lots of reasons for going private, including the desire to provide your children with a child-centred learning environment where they are treated with respect, fed well, given choice and responsibility and where they can focus on learning instead of tolerating constant disruption and conflict.

Just because the comprehensive system is such a failure doesn’t mean that private equals privilege. Just something humane and decent.

But are happy to buy privilege in form of tutoring/using grammars and buying ££ houses to ensure they have access to best state schools.

Everyone would if they could afford it. Or didn't prefer to spend their cash on other stuff. That is the truth.

No they wouldn’t. There are many people who could afford private education and don’t believe in buying privilege.

Please tell your husband to buck up and send your kid to private. Everyone would if they could afford it. Or didn't prefer to spend their cash on other stuff. That is the truth.

All the English secondary schools I know of are genuinely horrible places. Massive, badly resourced and under staffed by really sub par “teachers” who bully and demean the children and spend their time demanding compliance on the most irrelevant things like make up, uniform and even the colour of pen they use.
And the food is genuinely shocking, expensive and of very little nutritional value. And often runs out.

Private school does seem to give dc a lot of confidence. All 4 of mine went private for secondary and are good at putting themselves across. Dd3, my youngest, is in y13, head of house, head of CCF, just got 100% in her grade 8 LAMDA and is about to sit her grade 8 piano. She has done her d of e gold, has completed all her ballet grades, competes in athletics and fences a few times a week. We are on UC, she has a full bursary and she has ADHD.
She'd probably have been fine at our local state school though.

can they not do 11+ ?

a good state school, with extra curricular and tutoring will achieve similar academic outcomes

So, after all these yrs, I know. Thanks.

@HeWhoMustNotBeNamed Do you think bullying only happens in private schools?
My step daughter was so badly bullied at a state school for being ‘posh’ she had to leave. But maybe you would consider that learning resilience.

(The A star didn’t exist then)

@Idontpostmuch ,

S stood for ‘scholarship’, although they didn’t qualify you for a scholarship, sadly.

They were extra elective exams you could choose to take. Most people did 2 (who did any) and they were graded fail, credit or distinction (or 2 or 1, with the 1 being a distinction). They were a similar standard to Oxbridge entrance, although maybe a different style.

Although Oxbridge entrance exams were a thing then, some people still got conditional offers based on A levels, which might have included S levels. So, to read Mathematics, your offer might have been AAA with at least a credit in Maths S level.

I know all about boarding school syndrome but you then claimed that day schools were no different. Things have hugely moved on since your DH went to boarding school eg safeguarding etc.

You are applying old tropes and clichés to a whole sector of schools. It's like me saying all state schools are full of chavs.
Independent schools aren't 1 homogenous lump of schools all with rhe same characteristics, it's a hugely diverse sector. Same as state sector.

You had no problem being snidey about all independent schools FYI "putting your child in a toxic and judgemental environment where they have to build a shield of confidence around themselves so that the other children don't have anything to bully them for" .

Our private school is cheap but over half of the kids either come from a background of inter generational wealth or as a minimum the grandparents are paying the fees. One child at private is £22k a year here. That is about £2k of your post tax income a month per child. Both parents need to be in good jobs to be able to afford that, esp if you have more than one child.