School refused to release my child until after parents’ meeting – is this allowed?

All children are special. Didn't your mother ever tell you that?

Damn this is wrong. I feel so sorry for kids putting up with this sort of attitude all day. "You are not special, do as your told, get your mother to do as she is told, then we might deign to acknowledge your presence without a sneer. We might."

OP has said that she knew about the meeting. What she and at least one other parent didn't know until 10:30, was that the children would not be released if the person picking them up didn't attend meeting.

I spent last year grabbing child a from primary school and then racing over to grab child b from secondary school because there was a years waitlist for the school bus. This would have completely screwed me over particularly if I was meant to be getting them back out for clubs. Not okay without notice.

I would have insisted and not taken no for an answer. I don’t believe they are allowed to detain your child in that way, contrary to what many others are saying.

I also think you can walk in during the day and take your child - they can put it down as unauthorised but I don’t think they can stop you unless they believe there’s a safety issue.

As someone who has taught in schools for over 25 years, the school were completely in the wrong here.

We are only allowed to withhold a child from a parent collecting if we have been advised to by police, social services or a court order. Or we withhold if we feel the child is in danger, should the parent turn up under the influence of drink/drugs.

TBH, I'd write a letter of complaint to the headteacher. This is something I'd be willing to become "that parent" over. It is not ok for a school to hold a child against the parents will. Whilst I'm not given to dramatics, this is imprisonment.

There is absolutely no chance you only had notice on the same day. I would imagine they are used to people not reading the information and putting the kids in the hall is one way to make sure people attend and listen to what is probably some quite important information about the requirements of the school day, so they don't get repeated "I wasn't told...".

I'm betting the 10:30 email was a reminder....

It would piss me off. There’s a small window after school before the first activity. 20 minutes delay means no time for kids to have a snack, get changed, go to the loo. They have no right to keep the kids longer.

I think this might be the issue.
Many parents having limited English.

The school are struggling to communicate with parents. Emails are being miss understood, or ignored so someone has decided to try an in person meeting thinking oral English might be easier understood than written English

Doesn't make it right but they can only try.

Right, as a school governor of 30+ years, I would be very unhappy about this and tomorrow, when you go into school ask the reception desk for a copy of the school complaints policy.

Next go to the class teacher who refused to release your child and tell them you are not happy with what happened yesterday, if you do not get a fulsome apology, then say, "I am unhappy with your response and I am now making a formal complaint." At this point the clock starts running... you now have two options, if you feel your written English is not 100% ask the front desk for a mtg with the HT as you wish to raise a formal complaint about what happened today. If they ask for it in writing, remind them that a complaint can be raised both verbally and in writing.

Then when you see the HT, explain what you have told us here:

• You were ill;
• You did not wish to discuss this in front of other parents;
• It was wrong of the school to detain your child.

Hope that this is helpful.

This is crazy, what is you have another child to collect with tight timing or swimming class / activity after school? Sounds very strange

YANBU I used to run into school to pick my DC and then rush back to work.

I also had a childminder who used to go to different schools.

I used to get after school detention on most days in secondary school and they would keep me on the same day but I don’t think they’re allowed to keep a child longer if the parents say no.

In fact, you have every right to walk in at the middle of the day and tell them you’re removing your child.

I would complain to the governors.

Yanbu OP, meetings like that should take place either during school hours or after hours with prior notice and should be optional. The school overstepped here.

Sorry but they don’t have custody of your kid. You can do what you want. There’s no law saying you can’t pick up a kid at the end of the school day if the school decides on a meeting.
they can report you if they have concerns, they can kick you out the school, they can mark it as unauthorised pickup, but they cannot deny your access to your kid

‘There isn’t really a parents’ community at this school, no WhatsApp group, and many parents have limited English, so we can’t even talk things through properly. It’s just an ordinary London primary school’

I feel for the teachers if this is the case.

I feel sorry for teachers trying to manage a cohort of kids where none of the parents can even communicate in English and need a special meeting arranged after term starts to remind them of etiquette and wearing uniform. Reading between the lines I think this must be a quite a challenging type of school to work in.

Why didn’t you just say you’re sorry but you feel really ill and you really can’t stay as you feel like you might pass out or be sick. They would be like right here’s Johnny, see ya

stop wanging on about human rights you sound like a right drama llama

I can't work out what this means.

Are you agreeing with the OP that they shouldn't have been prevented from going home, or disgreeing because you don't think school children or their parents should need to be somewhere at a certain time?

I'd say school is very much centred around the needs of the child.

Children 'kept waiting for 20 minutes'? So what - does everything have to be about them? Some things are more important.

You can be aware of your legal rights without suing everyone around you. Of course OP should write a polite, calm letter to the head pointing out that the school had no basis to withhold children from their parents. This gives the head the opportunity to point it out to the teachers and avoids it happening again.

Teacher here. I'd be REALLY pissed off if this happened to me (as a parent) and I cannot believe my school/Head would ever do it. It surely can't be allowed?

I thought this was going to be a post about a major safeguarding issue. That's the only time that a school is within their rights to keep an adult from collecting their child.

I would be angry about this.

It's one of those threads where the first few responses want to disagree with the OP just for the sake of it, and then nearly everyone esle piles on.

These are obviously not the same people who start threads about managing school pick up when they have children at different schools or clubs that start at a certain time, or have had to leave a meeting early (despite agreed working hours) and rushed to get to pick up on time.

It actually doesn’t matter when parents were informed that there was going to be a meeting. Schools do not have rights over children to withhold them from their legal guardians. That just isn’t the role of a school, and I would like to think that if a school made it clear that they were becoming third parent when you enrolled your children there, people would go elsewhere!