School refused to release my child until after parents’ meeting – is this allowed?

What would your boss do if this happened once, reallly? C’mon, don’t drama lllama it. I do school pick up whilst wfh and sometimes yes it is mega stressful but I do expect there is a risk that I wouldn’t be able to whip my children away to my schedule all the time. It’s a risk I take really, and it’s pretty much on me to take it.

it’s either suck it up or cause a huge scene, storm in and drag your kids out, which I suggest most people would rather not do.

I’m really surprised how many posters on here are ok with this. There are loads of reasons why parents can’t hang around after the usual school end time (and you know if there are a couple of parents who like to ask questions in the meeting it could run over by quite a bit).

I picked my son up from school today, I couldn’t have stayed an extra 20 mins because my other child had a club she needed to get to. Also, even if you turned up at any time to collect your child surely they can’t just refuse to release them?

I agree they can’t do this and similar to pp - I would have just insisted that my child be handed over if i wasn’t able to stay for the meeting. I’m afraid I’m always rather firm with schools or those in healthcare that try and say ‘you cannot do x or y’. I’d be emailing the head and the governors about it and getting their answer in writing - it’s always more difficult for them to justify ridiculous things in writing.

This isn’t something that would have happened at the primary school DS went to - albeit that’s because had the school done so, a large number of mums would have seen it as free childcare and shot off to the pub! The Head therefore was always wary about after school events which potentially indicated that the kids would be supervisors and the parents didn’t have to stay (ie PTA events).

Hahaha, do you live in an alternative universe. Schools seem to regularly give little or no notice for things and just assume parents are able to be there at the drop of a hat.

I mean I know some Schools are better at it then others but it's not that uncommon.

I would be shocked if this happened. Lots of people have things to do after pick up: work, medical appointments, clubs, other children to collect, buses and trains to catch.

Attending the meeting should be optional, and planned well in advance, and collecting your child should never be denied to you.

Don't be an arse. OP has explained multiple times that English isn't her first language and sometimes it seems over formal.

This is my situation. The taxi arrives sometimes minutes after we have rushed home as it is. If school had forced me to wait then my older child and everyone else in the minibus would have been left waiting outside my house for 15plus minutes. We also have after-school paid for classes that we would be late for, some people are still working at that time too so need to get back for that. I wouldn't be happy and would be emailing the head teacher a stern (but polite) message.

Was it about an upcoming OFSTED insection? My son's school did this once, kept all the kids in so a letter could be given to the parents about the inspection. .

Have you tried a no win/no fee lawyer yet? There MUST be compo in this somewhere.

🙄

I'm a retired teacher and I'm amazed at the number of posters telling OP that she should just suck this up. If parents were genuinely only told mid morning today that their children wouldn't be released (so many won't have seen the email, never mind have time to rearrange commitments/find someone else to pick up their children at other schools) then they are entirely in the wrong.

I don’t know what everyone on this thread is smoking but no it is not ok 😂 particularly given the short notice.
A meeting like this should be in school time and/or non compulsory, especially given they are primary school age.
I would have taken my child and left.

Should I also tell my boss to suck it up and be positive if she complains I missed my 4pm Teams meeting cause the school wouldn't let my DC out?

What odd replies. Regardless if she’s missed an email or not they shouldn’t be so rigid

i wouldn’t have been able to stay as my DS finished school 15 mins later a 10 min walk away

and on my working days the non parent picking up would have been very unhappy!!

I find it extremely frustrating when schools act like this, and you should be able to take your child home at the usual time OP, even if an exceptional meeting was planned and even if notice had been given.

That said, if your child sees you kicking up a fuss or even just detects your frustration on the way home or hears you venting to your DH later, I wonder if that teaches them that not respecting school rules and arguing with teachers is okay. I would suck it up for the 20 minutes and move on.

I'm a teacher and think this is very poor.

The school should have given much more notice and should have released the children at home time to any parents who couldn't stay for the after school meeting or who didn't wish to stay for it.

Yes, as was the claim that it breached your "right to a family life".
Perhaps because English isn't your first language you aren't aware of how that would come across in this instance.
Just an email of complaint to the headteacher would suffice. Good luck.

That is exactly what I would have done.

Ok so technically the school cannot do this, in practice some schools do, and you risk damaging your relationship with them if you complain about it.

What I would do is email the office asking them to check whether you are on the correct mailing list - explain that you had not known about the information meeting, and that for personal reasons and your other commitments it was very inconvenient to have to wait to collect your child, so you want to check that you are getting all messages that you should be getting so that this kind of problem does not arise again.

It’s entirely possible that there were multiple messages about this and that you didn’t get them! It’s also a polite way to subtly remind school that actually this was inconvenient.

I appreciate you want to know how things work in England - being overly polite and a bit passive aggressive is a large part of how things work here :)

This is definitely not ok. School should only refuse to release a child if there's a safeguarding concern.

On a more practical level, I'd have been fuming. DS currently has daily wound/dressing checks at a hospital 45 minutes drive away. The department he's with closes at 4.30 and he gets out of school at 3.15. Refusing to release him to me could have a serious impact on his health.

Nice to see all the stay-at-home mums have gathered round to judge those of us who have to juggle multiple competing work commitments.

What do you mean ‘shut the door on us’? Where was this meeting held?

FFS! Kindly OP, get a grip. I’m pretty sure if you had replied to the email telling them that unfortunately as you are unwell you will be unable to stay for the meeting, you would have been able to take them home at home time.