Husband touched a kid to reprimand them on school trip

Ah, this all sounds so stressful op. I personally think that schools taking parent volunteers on trips have a duty to provide proper training to those parents to protect them. I've been a secondary teacher for 25 years and run lots of trips but I was really impressed when I volunteered at my kids primary school how they held meetings to run through risk assessments and roles and responsibilities for all types of volunteering including how to approach behaviour issues. It doesn't sound like your dh was trying to hit her, just get her attention.

Didn't read all 28 pages of arguments but I think the child should be reprimanded for behaving badly and your husband should be reprimanded for his inappropriate reaction. But I think how far this will go depends also on the child's parents reaction. Involving the police sounds like a complete overreaction though, assuming it really was just a tap.

Firstly I'd try to draw a line under it for tonight, get a good night's sleep, and see how it looks in the morning. If I were planning to go to the police I think I would have prioritised that over the meeting, apology etc. so hopefully that's a sign they're not planning to escalate it.

As to whether they should escalate it, I see a difference between prodding someone on the head with a finger to get their attention (in order to speak to them - in the same way you might tap someone's shoulder) and an open palmed tap (hit) which in itself is designed to say "knock it off" rather than start a conversation. I couldn't get too worked up about the former and that's what I pictured when I read the OP. You might never know exactly what it was hence I think you now just need to put it out of your head.

Well, I’m glad everything is ok op.

If my son had told me someone gave him a tap on the head from the seat behind on a bus, I wouldn’t have batted an eyelid. I would have assumed he was being irritating and suggested he sit still in future. It’s not like your husband whacked her.

Made to apologise to the child in front of the teacher and parent lol - Well, good luck to that parent going forward, she’ll probably need it.

And we wonder how these kids get to 20 and can’t cope with life. Precious parenting at its finest. I can’t stand it. The pearl clutching is just so over the top.

As I say, glad this is over now op. I wouldn’t bother offering to go on any more trips. The school will have to fund a 1-2-1 TA won’t they.

But you've made that up

Aaahhh the old switcheroo! So you couldn’t find any guidelines to prove your point? I thought not!

However, here’s your link as requested to show teachers can touch children:

Please note the 1st line of this section: “Schools should not have a “no contact” policy. This has been in legislative policy for at least 15-20 years.

https://consult.education.gov.uk/behaviour-unit/revised-use-of-reasonable-force-guidance/supporting_documents/Use%20of%20reasonable%20force%20and%20other%20restrictive%20interventions%20guidance.pdf

So yeah this is real life and teachers are saying this. Some just seem to be more informed than others. Mind that you don’t fall when you get down off that high horse…

can't tap your own on the head either!!

It's the sort of thing teachers used to do decades ago to naughty kids making trouble on a bus, I know. But that was then. And they were teachers not random parents.

You just can't hit someone else's kid on the head. It might have seemed like a tap, but was clearly enough of something for the teacher to notice.

I guess he'll have to apologise and take the consequences.

Poor bloke. What a huge over reaction by everyone concerned. No wonder kids are little shites these days.

As a teacher I’ve often nodded off on the return leg of a trip. There’s always plenty of adults. It’s bloody exhausting taking children out of school for the day. Not sure how I’d ’keep myself awake’ as some are suggesting.

Lots of talk about the personal inconvenience of his actions having consequences. No thought for the little girl who had to tensely be around and try to avoid that man for the entire rest of the day before she could get away from him and be back home safely :-(

Op your post says he touched a kid to reprimand them. You need to change it to tapped a kid to get her attention to reprimand her. Very different.

Reminds me of the woman who got annoyed with another woman working in B&Q for removing her child from the shelving that she was climbing. It's incredibly dangerous to climb on said shelving (where I used to work it was instant dismissal if any of us were caught doing it, but customers didn't go in the warehouse.) I suppose the B&Q woman could have ignored the toddler, but if she fell and hurt herself it would be the shop's fault.
I have sometimes had to (gently) tap my DS on the head when tapping his hand doesn't work. He gets distracted when eating and I don't really want to sit there for two hours while he eats his lunch. Clearly social services need to be called. 🙄

I regularly make physical contact with children at school. They hug you , hold your hand etc. the key is that it is child led and minimal.

@ToddlerIs2

Oh blimey.... what a day.

I'm glad your DH has been apologetic and been into sort things out.

He's been an utter pillock but it sounds like he's no nasty guy. Just done something stupid.

I hope you both put this behind you now and calm down.

And on the discussion of teachers touching children - our primary school haven't read the "do not touch" documents.

I’m presuming he tapped the girl on the head to get her attention as only her head is visible in the coach seat? I wouldn’t worry as that sounds reasonable but not advisable. Im sure the head will just reiterate that he should have flagged up the behaviour with a staff member. I’m a TA.

Exactly

That explains why she is so clueless about the needs of children in school then

Agree @ParmaVioletTea

if anyone one asks OP just tell them the truth and absurdity of it all.

Times my DS has been touched in school (that I know about):

• the time he had a nose bleed in reception, he was sitting on his teacher's knee when I picked him up
• the time also in reception he had an unfortunate onset of Noro at school and his poor (and extremely lovely) teacher helped him out of his sicky clothes before he was picked up
• the time in year 1 he fell in the playground and put his teeth through his lower lip - he was holding his PE teacher's hand when I picked him up
• at sports day he won a race and gave his year 3 teacher a big hug to celebrate

These are just the ones that immediately spring to mind and I actually saw! Are you saying these teachers are all "sick and weird" or should be sacked. I cannot believe you actually work in a school.

She’s not a teacher