Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder what men mean when they say I’m like an onion?

35 replies

MyOpalReader · 14/09/2025 21:10

I’ve had multiple men tell me that I have “so many layers” and that they have to “peel them back” to get to the core of who I am. I don’t know whether to take this as a compliment or something else entirely. Do people actually like the idea of peeling back layers or is this a polite way of saying I’m hard to figure out?

OP posts:
MyOpalReader · 14/09/2025 21:34

PrivateMusic · 14/09/2025 21:29

Really, multiple men have all said this?

Yes, a few over the years, which is why it stuck with me. I’ve always wondered what they were really trying to say by it.

OP posts:
Pinkelephant66 · 14/09/2025 21:30

GeckoClimber · 14/09/2025 21:11

Maybe they’ve watched Shrek and think it sounds clever?

This 100%

PrivateMusic · 14/09/2025 21:29

Really, multiple men have all said this?

pizzaHeart · 14/09/2025 21:23

I would think that it’s difficult to say what your personality was like, you didn’t give out much info about yourself.
The cynic in me suspects that you don’t go to bed with them straight away or you don’t listen them with an open mouth.

Ormally · 14/09/2025 21:16

In some European languages, sadly the interpretation is for 'no heart' (after going down the layers to look for it).

Elektra1 · 14/09/2025 21:14

It means you’re guarded and they perceive you as a tough nut to crack. Some men might say “hard work”. Nothing wrong with having boundaries and taking your time before jumping into something though (from a fellow onion).

Soukmyfalafel · 14/09/2025 21:14

You either have many layers or you make them cry.

GeckoClimber · 14/09/2025 21:11

Maybe they’ve watched Shrek and think it sounds clever?

NotTodayMarshall · 14/09/2025 21:10

Do you smell? Grin