To be angry with DH for not coming home?

I don’t disagree. He’s a massive shit for not calling. I also doubt he’s even told his boss about DD being in hospital

but a Lot of men are afraid of ruffling feathers or asking for adjustments in the work place. They’re all terrified of being difficult, it’s very rubbish. He absolutely could be doing better from Australia OP.

he should be finding a reasonable solution so he can talk to his child

Ah yes, poor men. They have such a hard time in comparison to women who are all living the life of Riley.

So, yeah, ducks in a row, organise the lawyer right now, assuming any of this is actually true.

I've worked with this man. I'd be checking his knickers when he brings his laundry home for his wife to do.

Struggling to see the issue. My daughter has been in hospital loads, we work as a couple to make sure family and work are covered. There are times when my husband absolutely cannot take time off work. When he can’t, I do. The same works in reverse. His job is more important than mine at times. Millions of people rely on him being there to do his job half a dozen times a year. I understand that and know that whatever happens, I’m flying solo.

Your daughter is asking for him, it’s not difficult to remind her he is thousands of miles away and would be here if he could be, but you’re here and that’s ok. I’d be focusing on my immediate surroundings, updating him by text so he knows what’s going on. What could he actually do if he were there? If it is just to “be there” then that’s not enough for him to come home. If there is a lack of any physical support for you with your other children then you ask other family members or friends. If you have absolutely no support network then you need to have a discussion about what happens when he is away for work and there is an emergency.

I imagine not having a film director available is a massive problem for a production, you’ve already said your boss has covered your work so the comparative loss isn’t the same. Sometimes his job will be more important, that’s the nature of it. But from all your responses, it sounds like you have much bigger things you think are a problem with your husband. Those need to be addressed but him jumping on a plane right now won’t make any difference to those.

If the poor menz - we must all think of them.

I was thinking the same. Just another thread to bash men.

Ooooh thank you!

In my opinion there is possibly one of two things happening here.

Either there is a very very sick child and H is being breathtakingly callous, which would seem odd given OPs first post about how good a husband and father he is.

Or OP is massively over-egging the situation.

OP, honestly: how often is your DD in hospital, how life-threatening is it, and how much have you been calling and messaging your H?

Because honestly if it's not critical, if it's a common occurrence, and if you've been blowing up his phone every few minutes, I could actually understand why he's acting the way he is.

Yea I COMPLETELY agree. 100%. So does mine. But my husband doesn’t work in Hollywood industry. Totally different ball game and the people within that industry are a breed of their own.

Or he simply 100 percent does not care and just wants to stick his penis in another woman, uninterrupted.

He sounds like he is too wrapped up in his work. I don’t think I would necessarily expect him to come hope but I would be livid about not calling or video calling even if it means he has to get up in the middle of the night. I think in the film industry people get completely absorbed whilst away on location and forget their real life. But it is unforgivable to not speak to his child.

Ive read all your updates and i hope your daughter is feeling better.

To give your DH the benefit of the doubt, i expect that abandoning this project will not alone cost this production alot of money, i may also have a detrimental affect on his career. I understand his reluctance to get home.

What is less understandable however is the inability to give you 10/15 minutes in his day to call and check up on his family. Leaving the sick child out of it, i think this is the bear minimum your DH can give his partner holding down the home. That is not acceptable.

You say you're livid, @Coffeeoftheworld but kudos to you, you don't sound it here.

What are you responding to him when he sends you those messages saying he won't be replying to you for four days?

He's disgusting, as others have said he can find two minutes in his day to speak to his daughter. Vile man. This would be the end for me, he wouldn't have a wife to come back to, that's for sure.

You have very low expectations of your husband don’t you ?

Either this is a wind up or he's having an affair and it worried his affair partner will somehow intrude on the call. No one is this unreasonable otherwise.

Agreed. But that world makes them think they are too important and irreplaceable. Both things are untrue of course but the are Hollywood for you.

My dh has an equally demanding anti family type of role - he always move heaven and earth to be here for us, and would be in constant contact if this wasn’t possible whilst working on a plan to terminate his work and be with us asap.

Many women (friends of mine) have equally prestigious and challenging roles, somehow they always seem to not abandon their kids. It’s bullshit and you know it.

Old saying

‘He would, if he wanted to’

He is up to something shady. Sorry but he is.

I can maybe understand him not flying back if it is not life threatening.

But him refusing to talk and limiting messages is really really suspicious.

Absolutely. Completely agree. The fact he’s not ringing or FaceTiming I have said from the start is alarming bells, all the red flags are waving. Totally unacceptable. Him not travelling back from Australia is what I feel is understandable. The rest is awful behaviour.

He can find 15 fucking minutes.