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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be angry with DH for not coming home?

957 replies

Coffeeoftheworld · 14/09/2025 14:52

DH is on a 3 week work trip in Australia, he’s been out there for a week and has 2 more weeks to go. Our DD was admitted to hospital on Friday and DH is refusing to come home to see DD in hospital. He is just saying he “can’t abandon work” and that his boss will be “unhappy” with him if he comes home early. AIBU to he angry with DH for not coming home? DD is asking for him in hospital too and is really ill. I travel for work too sometimes but I would absolutely come home immediately if DD had been taken in to hospital whilst I was away, no matter how unhappy my boss would be with me for coming home. The most that DH has said is to send him “updates” on how DD gets on in hospital. I feel like he doesn’t care about her, he’s always been such a good husband and such a good dad but this makes me feel like he doesn’t care. He also won’t FaceTime her because of “the time difference” between the UK and Australia!

OP posts:
Comedycook · 14/09/2025 14:59

I think this depends on how ill she is... Australia is hardly a short plane ride away. However,even if he can't, it is absolutely awful that he won't even facetime. He should really make the effort to do that.

Wishing your DD well by the way

Coffeeoftheworld · 14/09/2025 14:59

JustFrustrated · 14/09/2025 14:53

Is this an "admitted but will be fine" or life changing admission?

Serious admission. Don’t want to give too much detail on here though so that it’s not identifying but the admission also relates to a chronic illness that DD has.

OP posts:
Coffeeoftheworld · 14/09/2025 14:58

Sirzy · 14/09/2025 14:55

How long is she likely to be in? Realistically from Australia it would be 3 or 4 days before he could get back anyway so if she is likely to be home and well on the mend by then then it seems a bit pointless.

Would be nice if he could arrange a call though!

She’s going to be in for at least a week we think so far.

OP posts:
minipie · 14/09/2025 14:57

Depends how serious the illness is tbh

If she is in real danger then YANBU
If she’s not and will be out in a day or two with treatment then YABU

Sirzy · 14/09/2025 14:55

How long is she likely to be in? Realistically from Australia it would be 3 or 4 days before he could get back anyway so if she is likely to be home and well on the mend by then then it seems a bit pointless.

Would be nice if he could arrange a call though!

Crunchymum · 14/09/2025 14:54

How ill is your DD? Will she improve? I know I'd want to be there for my poorly child but context is important.

JustFrustrated · 14/09/2025 14:53

Is this an "admitted but will be fine" or life changing admission?

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