Friend using my credit card.

Same here. I couldn’t even use my card for online takeout. It kept saying my card was declined by my bank. After the fifth try and also trying another card I finally received a OTP.

The OP needs to increase her banking security and also get help from a food bank.

Get yourself a part time Christmas temp job and stop spending money on things you can't afford like businesses & holidays.

https://careers.royalmailgroup.com/gb/en/temporary-jobs

https://uk.indeed.com/m/jobs?q=temporary%20christmas&l=&radius=25&from=searchOnSerp&sameQ=1

Get your ex to take your child each weekend, get a Christmas temp job and pay her back.

She was wrong, she’s stealing. Plain and simple.

and youre also totally in the wrong! You cannot say a time and then say “well I had every intention but”. That’s not her problem, just like you need money, so does she. You need to pay her back asap. What you did isn’t okay! Think about her pov, she asked, you said yes and left her hanging with her bill. Pretty bad friend.

None of this adds up.

You lost the moral high ground when you borrowed money from a friend who sounds equally financially incompetent.

Why are spending money on a holiday when you have an outstanding debt to a friend?

If the friend can’t afford to pay her phone bill without your monthly £100 payment, how could she afford to lend you £2000 in the first place?

Can she afford the holiday?

What sort of ‘business’ are you running? MLM?

OP says the loan was £2000 borrowed six months ago and there is £1300 left to pay. That being the case OP is ahead with the payments - the agreement was £100 a month. I do agree it’s a bit of a shitshow though. Not least because it sounds as though her friend is waiting on OP’s payments to pay her bills. That suggests she couldn’t really afford to lend her the money in the first place.

Yes it’s wrong but you were wrong to go on holiday without paying her back the £1300. If you couldn’t afford it you shouldn’t have gone. Was that why you owe her £1300? For the holiday? Cancelling a card won’t have any affect as she didn’t use your card. I don’t understand how she paid her bill just using the details though. If she paid via online banking she would also need your login details. I would be closing the account and reopening a new one.

Why did she need your bank details to book a holiday unless she sent you money? Be very careful in future about what information you give her and make repaying her a priority.

It doesn't sound like you can really afford to be self employed full time, OP. Get a part time job and run your business around that.

I’m guessing the holiday is going to be tension

cc won’t do anything as you have her the 16 dig and exp date and 3 numbers on the back

I’m not saying what she did was right but what you did was wrong

you also said you overpaid her twice. How ? More than £100 a month ?

Completely untrue! Of course OP can do something about it!

@BePunnyDuck

Firstly this is fraud so you need to report it to your bank and have the payment reversed. You should also report this to the police. And cancel the card.

Secondly, you need to sort your finances out. If 2 weeks of no work leaves you broke then why are you booking a holiday?!? Holidays are a luxury!

Yes you owe this "friend" money but they have no right to just use your card details.

If the child lives with OP it doesn’t really matter does it ? The child is being housed, fed and clothed and all their other needs are being taken care of via OP’s household income.

Why are you booking a holiday when you’re in debt and barely managing to keep with the payments?

The whole thing is a shitshow. Don’t borrow big sums of money from friends. Being a day or two late is “letting her down”. She was unreasonable to use your card details but there’s nothing you can do about it.

The details were probably in an email or message that friend hasn't bothered to delete. I don't think you can read anything into that.

Phone your bank and tell them you didn't authorise the transaction (though might be more difficult if you gave her your details). Also ask to cancel that card because you're scared she'll do it again, and have a new one issued - do NOT give anyone else the details.
You do need to pay her back, but not from money meant for your DD! Instalments will be a better option, paid into her account (that will be a record). I understand her wanting the money back, but peoole also shouldn't lend what they cannot afford to lend!

What do you mean by overpaid her twice? Have you overpaid the loan which means you don't owe her anything? Or you've made over payments on the installments which means you still owe her but not as much.

Cancel the credit card and if you've shared personal bank account details then o0en a new account and cancel your current bank account.

If you have to take a loan out from a friend rather than a bank to start a business, it might mean that your credit rating is poor. I also think you don't have a sense financial responsibility or understanding especially if you share credit card details with a friend. Why couldn't you have saved the money and then started the business.

I'd look for a casual Christmas temp job or online admin job and repay her ASAP. Get an official CMS order for child maintenance and use it on yoyr child. Stop using your kids money to repay your loans & for your poor financial decisions.

Watch this finance video to help you get in control of your finances.

rebeldonegans.com/finance/rfs/course-notes/

It is fraud but incidentally if you said you were sending it and she also stole it from your account she would have had it twice!

But you wouldn’t be able to pay a bill with just bank details. You’d need either a debit/credit card, so the 16 digit number, the expiry date, and the 3-digit security code.

You are being very unreasonable. You also got the title of your post wrong. It should read: ‘I promised my friend to pay back a generous and substantial loan but I have on several occasions, including this week, been unreliable and a few days late. AIBU?’ Focus on paying her back, so she does not need to worry constantly if you’ll pay her back at all. She then won’t feel forced to ‘take’ it back herself; desperate times called for desperate action!

You shouldn't have shared your banking details with buyer friend

Your friend shouldn't have used your bank details (fraud/theft)

Cancel your card
NEVER share your bank details with anyone in the future
Work out a repayment plan for the money you owe your friend
Never borrow from a friend again - it always leads to probelms

This is madness.
You should’ve used a credit card or a bank, not a friend!

However - she’s committed a crime. A very stupid thing to have done..
I would report it as fraud and cancel your credit card. Get a new one.
borrow the money from the bank (or family if you really must) to pay back your friend asap.

Dont borrow money or lend money to friends ever again! And do not give this untrustworthy friend your card details ever again.

I am really confused now. Did the friend have OP’s bank details or credit card details? If you have someone’s bank details you still can’t go into their bank account and transfer money to yourself. All you can do is transfer money to their account.

OP, sorry to hear. It’s tough being self-employed. Pay her back as soon as you can, can you borrow the money from your dad and then pay him back ? I lent a friend £500 once and when I asked for it back a year later when I knew she was financially alright, she put the money in and never spoke to me again.

Cant you borrow the rest if what you owe and pay her back? Shes obviously at her wits ehds and wants her money back.

NOT ALL CARDS AND BANKS ARE LIKE YOURS PEOPLE.

just because you have TFA or OTOs set up for every transaction doesn’t mean it’s impossible not to. I only have to verify for large or unusual (international) payments when buying on line. It’s not that strange