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Original poster

How Many Children Would You Have...

243 replies

OtherS · 13/09/2025 17:38

If you had no worries about space, money, negative impact on career, social life etc? A lot of people seem to suggest that the collapsing birth rate is down to financial worries etc, but I'm wondering whether it's at least as much to do with women not actually wanting huge numbers of children. We used to have 6, 7 or more very regularly of course, but we didn't have much choice back then. Now we have contraception and less societal / marital pressure to have kids, is the reason for low birth rates more to do with woman's choice than concern about the impact of a large family?

AIBU - It's all about money; if I could afford to have 14 kids, keep my job, figure and lifestyle, I'd be all in
YANBU - Even with all the wealth - and nannies - in the world, 1 or 2 would definitely be more than enough for me, thanks.

OP posts:
gudetamathelazyegg · 13/09/2025 18:17

My mum was one of five in the sixties. I'm an only child, and I'm having 0. Of my friends who have had a kid so far they're one and done (some wanted 2 but changed their mind after the first). I've seen people say "oh you'd change your mind if they paid you" it could be tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands and I'd keep saying no!

Too right all these right wing blokes should put their money where their mouth is and pay mothers for their (literal and otherwise) labour!

PeloMom · 13/09/2025 18:15

one. For me that’s the perfect number regardless of money, space etc.

Tipeetommeey · 13/09/2025 18:13

I’ve got 3 and that’s perfect. No way could I give anymore the quality time and attention they deserve

rosemarycait96 · 13/09/2025 18:06

I want 4, but we are planning to stop at 3 unless we come into more money. We have the space in the house but can't afford the car or other bits for so many kids especially as our first two are quite close in age and we are currently being caned by 2 sets of nursery fees.

Imissgoldengrahams · 13/09/2025 18:06

I have four.
In all honesty, I wouldn't have any if I could go back in time

Ponderingwindow · 13/09/2025 18:04

I would have had a second child if I had no concerns about money.

I can only afford university for one child in my country. That was our biggest constraint.

Simonjt · 13/09/2025 18:04

Two for us, money doesn’t buy more 1:1 time with them, and thats something we wouldn’t want to reduce at all to fit in another child.

GreyCarpet · 13/09/2025 18:04

can’t believe I brought such an amazing person into such a shitty world.

I often feel that way too

Springflowersyay · 13/09/2025 18:03

Zero! I love my child free life!!

GreyCarpet · 13/09/2025 18:03

I wanted two and I had two.

If I had my time again and with all the money/resources in the world, I'd still have two.

I wanted my own life too.

AnneLovesGilbert · 13/09/2025 18:01

I’ve got two from 8 pregnancies and would have loved two more but I’m terrible at the whole thing and another would literally kill me so I’m grateful for what I’ve got and DH had a vasectomy.

Gallopingfanjo · 13/09/2025 18:00

I have no money worries, work is flexible, DH adults, 2 was my limit as kids impose their lives on mine. I’m selfish

redgingerbread · 13/09/2025 18:00

I hoped for two; that didn’t pan out, and in many ways I think one was the perfect number for us. Even if I were rich I don’t think I could cope with a large family!

MaryGreenhill · 13/09/2025 17:59

None

Gnarab24 · 13/09/2025 17:59

I wanted none
I have one.
For a short while after having DC1 I desperately wanted another.
16 years later watching the environment collapse and the inequality growing and the way the world is changing I wish I’d stuck with none.
can’t believe I brought such an amazing person into such a shitty world.

ResusciAnnie · 13/09/2025 17:58

I’ve got 3, I can’t imagine I’d cope well with 4 but if I had a nanny maybe!! 2 was heavenly but a bit too calm 😁 3 is a good balance for us.

MelonElla · 13/09/2025 17:58

I'd have liked two. I have one due to secondary infertility.

Comedycook · 13/09/2025 17:57

If money was literally no object as in I could have multiple homes, luxury holidays, 24/7 nannies....then maybe 3 or 4 at a push. I have two DC and that is all I could cope with, but I'd love my dc to have more siblings.

bapples1 · 13/09/2025 17:56

I would have had 4 if I was rich.

EmmaRose89 · 13/09/2025 17:55

I think 2 is ideal

ninjahamster · 13/09/2025 17:55

We have 4 together. DH has two older daughters too. I think I would have had a couple more.

BlondieMuver · 13/09/2025 17:55

I have 6dc. 2 families effectively.
Money and space weren't an issue.
Unlike many on MN, having dc was a very positive experience.

DolefullySingingMotherfucka · 13/09/2025 17:54

I'm very happy with none, so I would stick with that number.

SerendipityDiamond · 13/09/2025 17:52

We have 3. Might have had 4 if started earlier and one of them wasn’t such a terrible sleeper.

CaroleLandis · 13/09/2025 17:48

I have five. Three stepchildren who I had full time after their mother died and they were only 1, 3 and 4 and two I gave birth to. All are adults now and we are all very close. I have three siblings so adapted fine to having five children.

Personally, I wouldn’t have liked to have just had one child.

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