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Original poster

To not want to send a voice note on whatsapp to someone I've just exchanged numbers with on a dating app

69 replies

Forfucksake84 · 12/09/2025 21:13

Anyone else hate sending voice notes? Especially to people you don't know. I just find them awkward and embarrassing, and would much rather text but he keeps asking me

OP posts:
Starseeking · 13/09/2025 13:39

TwistedWonder · 13/09/2025 11:39

Never left a voice note and never done a FaceTime. I’ve had people send me voice notes and I reply with a text. Hate them with a passion

I do this as well; I always respond to voice notes with texts, from friends and family, as well as potential love interests.

Plastictreees · 13/09/2025 13:32

@Pirandello2404 I would find this considerably more cringe and awkward than a phone call. I wouldn’t make a decision to date someone or not based on a voice note!

Pirandello2404 · 13/09/2025 12:33

@123ZYX @Plastictreees I think it can feel awkward/ embarrassing to have a phone call with someone you don't know so a voice note lets you into their world a bit without you having to engage with them. I think that's why Hinge has introduced an option to leave a voice note on your profile- if you can hear someone's voice you can more easily work out if you might like them. It's time saving as one voice message can save on weeks of texting before meeting for the date, and then realising you're not interested.

Just to say, I've never done this!

Globules · 13/09/2025 11:56

Yuck.

I hate voice notes.

Had XP and I exchanged voice notes, I'd never have met him.

Stick to your guns @Forfucksake84

Shayisgreat · 13/09/2025 11:47

Voice notes are shit! I have to either listen to them in private or put my headphones in. If I'm listening to music then the music stops to listen to the shit waffle.

It sometime feels like people don't want to organise their thoughts enough to compose a text so speak it out. Either message me or call me - I can't be dealing with voice notes.

nomas · 13/09/2025 11:47

I hate voice notes too. You’ve stated a boundary, if he keeps insisting, take it as a red flag.

Clarabell77 · 13/09/2025 11:43

You shouldn’t do anything you don’t want to do, it’s that simple.

TwistedWonder · 13/09/2025 11:41

Starseeking · 12/09/2025 22:22

I don’t like voice notes, but would be happy to have a chat before going to meet someone I’d met online.

Agree. I’ll happily have a phone call before a date but never a voice note or a FaceTime.

TwistedWonder · 13/09/2025 11:39

Never left a voice note and never done a FaceTime. I’ve had people send me voice notes and I reply with a text. Hate them with a passion

Plastictreees · 13/09/2025 10:47

123ZYX · 13/09/2025 10:46

Is there a reason that voice notes are preferred over a phone call? It seems like that would slow the conversation compared to a call or even exchanging messages?

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Yes this doesn’t make sense to me.

Plastictreees · 13/09/2025 10:47

@Pirandello2404 They weren’t a thing when I briefly did online dating, albeit several years ago now. Thankfully.

123ZYX · 13/09/2025 10:46

Pirandello2404 · 13/09/2025 10:23

Voice notes are definitely a "thing" in the online dating world (for those who don't know this and think it's a weird thing to ask for). They completely make sense as often as soon as you hear someone talking you know if you might be attracted to them or not, so it can save on weeks of pointless texting and then travelling to meet. However, if you don't want to, you shouldn't have to! I had a date with someone who wanted me to Zoom first- it totally made sense but I wasn't up for it and he respected this.

Is there a reason that voice notes are preferred over a phone call? It seems like that would slow the conversation compared to a call or even exchanging messages?

Pirandello2404 · 13/09/2025 10:23

Voice notes are definitely a "thing" in the online dating world (for those who don't know this and think it's a weird thing to ask for). They completely make sense as often as soon as you hear someone talking you know if you might be attracted to them or not, so it can save on weeks of pointless texting and then travelling to meet. However, if you don't want to, you shouldn't have to! I had a date with someone who wanted me to Zoom first- it totally made sense but I wasn't up for it and he respected this.

localnotail · 13/09/2025 10:17

I tell people straight away that I dont listen to voice notes. I dont have headphones and I cant be asked hiding somewhere to listen to it every time someone sends a message. Stop being so fucking lazy, or call me instead.

DelphiniumDoreen · 13/09/2025 08:19

pilates · 13/09/2025 08:09

Why is what I said odd?

If she doesn’t want to send a voice note she shouldn’t have to 🤷🏻‍♀️

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No, that was meant for @2Rebecca!

pilates · 13/09/2025 08:09

DelphiniumDoreen · 12/09/2025 22:18

How odd!

Do you also get them to write a letter to check their grammar and spelling is up to scratch?

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Why is what I said odd?

If she doesn’t want to send a voice note she shouldn’t have to 🤷🏻‍♀️

AffableApple · 13/09/2025 08:03

DelphiniumDoreen · 12/09/2025 21:40

Tell him you don’t like voice notes.

He should be jumping through hoops at this stage not telling you what to do!

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This. Ffs.

The13thFairy · 13/09/2025 08:00

Perhaps he wants to find out if you pronounce 'th'.

Crazycatladywithnocats · 12/09/2025 22:44

It’s not on for him to tell you how you “should be”. What is wrong with him picking up the phone and actually ringing you? All this voice note malarkey!

Ablondiebutagoody · 12/09/2025 22:36

Tell him to fuck off and stop pressuring you. Dick. I hate voice notes too.

Starseeking · 12/09/2025 22:22

I don’t like voice notes, but would be happy to have a chat before going to meet someone I’d met online.

Plastictreees · 12/09/2025 22:20

I hate voice notes. If he kept pushing it, I’d stop bothering with him. He sounds annoying.

whoosit · 12/09/2025 22:19

I think it's fine to say you don't do voice notes but I can understand wanting to actually speak to someone or hear their voice before you meet just to make sure they are vaguely who they say they are. However if you've only just exchanged numbers then there's no rush. I'm sure you can speak on the phone before meeting if that's how things progress. Do what you feel comfortable with.

DelphiniumDoreen · 12/09/2025 22:18

pilates · 12/09/2025 22:13

He doesn’t get to dictate to you and should accept if you don’t want to send voice notes. Sorry but it’s a 🚩 for me.

How odd!

Do you also get them to write a letter to check their grammar and spelling is up to scratch?

Ritasueandbobtoo9 · 12/09/2025 22:15

Just free yourself. No means no.

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