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AIBU?

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Original poster

To want dh to stop taking my bloody water?

81 replies

Lovelyzara · 12/09/2025 17:21

I like to have a glass of water by me to drink. I keep the same glass throughout most of the day and just keep refilling it. I always have it with me on a coaster next to where I’m sitting.

Dh keeps clearing it away, all the bloody time. I go to have a sip and he’s taken it.

Just why? And yes I have repeatedly asked him not to.

OP posts:
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Nearly50omg · 12/09/2025 20:23

hes abusive. I suspect if you had a read up on different types of abuse and other people’s stories you’d recognise a lot of things. Starts as subtle and then ramps up over the years - always with an excuse

whimsicallyprickly · 12/09/2025 20:15

Lovelyzara · 12/09/2025 17:29

Very absent minded. Sometimes I swear he’s losing it.

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Take him to the Doctor for a dementia test

Sunnyscribe · 12/09/2025 20:12

Buy a glass case for your desk/table to protect it.

PinkyFlamingo · 12/09/2025 20:10

Lovelyzara · 12/09/2025 17:51

The person who voted yabu - id love to know why 🤣

So it’s not even like I’m leaving the water lying around. It’s next to me and dh takes it when I’m not looking.

I have tried telling him to get me a replacement, but he just forgets to get one.

I could start pouring his coffee away, but I reckon he’d just think he forgot to make one and get himself another.

I could change to a water bottle but I do prefer a glass.

When I ask him why he keeps doing it he just says “ooo sorry”.

Not good enough. You don't need an apology you just need him to stop doing it

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 12/09/2025 20:05

Maybe something like this would work?

To want dh to stop taking my bloody water?
Kreepture · 12/09/2025 19:57

this house is too clumsy for glasses, drinks bottles//flasks all the way.. it also keeps the water fresher for longer.

In your case, i think the swat, misting spray or the sign are best options xD

FeralWoman · 12/09/2025 19:56

Lovelyzara · 12/09/2025 19:46

When he has a drink of water he goes to the tap, does it then puts the glass straight in the dishwasher.

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How many glasses does he go through each day? I’d go through so many if I did that. I have one that I use for the whole day, then a fresh one on my bedside table overnight for if I get thirsty or have a dry throat.

ArmyOfNorks · 12/09/2025 19:55

My mother in law does this when we visit her. She cannot cope with a cup or a glass anywhere but the cupboard or dishwasher. Her beady eyes stare at you calculating when you are close to your last sip. She will then sit on the edge of her seat ready to leap up and clear it away. It’s control freakery.

ForgetMeNotRose · 12/09/2025 19:52

Maybe he doesn't bring you another as it will enable the dreaded slow drinking

ForgetMeNotRose · 12/09/2025 19:51

Lovelyzara · 12/09/2025 19:46

When he has a drink of water he goes to the tap, does it then puts the glass straight in the dishwasher.

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I knew it!

It's a slow drinks protest

Original poster
Lovelyzara · 12/09/2025 19:46

ForgetMeNotRose · 12/09/2025 19:45

Does he think drinks must be drunk all at once? Does it expire

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When he has a drink of water he goes to the tap, does it then puts the glass straight in the dishwasher.

OP posts:
ForgetMeNotRose · 12/09/2025 19:45

Lovelyzara · 12/09/2025 18:30

But wtf, why?

It’s my drink, I’m drinking it. Should I not be allowed to have a glass of water in my own house? Do I have to down the whole glass immediately?

That’s nuts.

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Does he think drinks must be drunk all at once? Does it expire

FeralWoman · 12/09/2025 19:37

It’s deliberate and controlling. To go upstairs just to take away your water?! I mean WTF sort of controlling bullshit is that? What else does he do to control you?

When you tell him to get you a replacement glass of water don’t let him get away with not doing it. Keep on at him. Keep talking to him. Get up and follow him and make him get you that glass of water. Kind of like making a toilet trained but lazy child who keeps wetting their pants do the clean up themselves. Hopefully he’ll work out that it’s easier to leave your water alone.

This would drive me nuts. I’d be swearing at my DH and telling him to leave my fucking water alone unless he wants to wear it.

ARichtGoodDram · 12/09/2025 19:03

I'd do one of two options depending on what would bother him more - tell him you're concerned about his memory lapses and say you want him to book an appointment at the GP or demand (and I mean in a firm, loud - not necessarily shouting - way) he replaces it every time, and instantly. Be on his case until you have a new glass.

He's either struggling with his memory or has zero manners.

Obeseandashamed · 12/09/2025 18:59

I share your frustration. This annoys me to no end too!

BuckChuckets · 12/09/2025 18:55

I vote for @TheGreatWesternShrew's spraying water in his face every time he does it idea!

LilyCanna · 12/09/2025 18:42

I like the sign or the post it note ideas. More practical than my idea of putting superglue on a glass, as it would probably become non-sticky by the time he got to it!

TheGreatWesternShrew · 12/09/2025 18:41

I’m afraid your protests aren’t making an impression. You have a few options for impressing the importance upon him:

  1. a work style power point presentation that you present to him of an evening.
  2. every time he takes it you take a spray bottle of water and spray him in the face
  3. no more water for him. If you ever see him pour a glass, immediately snatch it and down it in front of him
Original poster
Lovelyzara · 12/09/2025 18:40

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Well not really. If I’m watching TV and engrossed in that not looking out for my water thief husband.

He’s always wandering around so I’m not watching him like a hawk.

Funny how you’ve made it my fault and called me vacant. Quite rude really.

OP posts:
GloriousGoosebumps · 12/09/2025 18:39

Curious behaviour from your dh. What would he do if you stuck a post-it note on the glass saying " please do not remove this glass"?

if a post-it note is unlikely to have the desired effect, have you considered simply hiding the glass behind something?

If all else fails, I'd do something to annoy him. Not simply removing his glass / cup because you say he wouldn't even notice but there must be something that would piss him off!

CarlaLemarchant · 12/09/2025 18:37

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OakleyStreetisnotinChelsea · 12/09/2025 18:33

DH did this to me too. My glass just vanishes. My father does it too. This makes me rather concerned about whether I have, in fact, married my father.

Then in the evening if I bring my glass through to the living room and we are both on the sofa the git then drinks from my glass so there isn't any water in it when I want it.

He does however do so the food shopping and most of cooking and is currently making curry while I drink gin so on balance I'm not not going to LTB over it.

Original poster
Lovelyzara · 12/09/2025 18:33

CarlaLemarchant · 12/09/2025 18:31

I’m sat next to a drink now. My DH couldn’t take it without me noticing. I actually can’t picture how this happens without you leaving drinks unattended around the house (which would annoy me and I’d probably take it to the sink 🫣)

Because I’m sitting on the sofa and the glass is on the table next t me on a coaster, I’m watching TV and I don’t notice him taking it until I go to take a sip.

Why is that hard to believe?

Sometimes I go upstairs to watch TV on my bed and have my glass on my bedside table and he comes and takes it.

OP posts:
CarlaLemarchant · 12/09/2025 18:31

I’m sat next to a drink now. My DH couldn’t take it without me noticing. I actually can’t picture how this happens without you leaving drinks unattended around the house (which would annoy me and I’d probably take it to the sink 🫣)

Original poster
Lovelyzara · 12/09/2025 18:30

IGaveSoManySigns · 12/09/2025 18:27

Just buy a water bottle? If I saw a half empty glass hanging around I’d get rid.

But wtf, why?

It’s my drink, I’m drinking it. Should I not be allowed to have a glass of water in my own house? Do I have to down the whole glass immediately?

That’s nuts.

OP posts:
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